Where do I go from here?

[houndstooth]

Hi everyone,

I have been living in Australia for several years and became a permanent resident about a year ago.

In the past I have been diagnosed with ADHD (primarily inattentive), generalized anxiety disorder and depression, however I have not been on medication or undergoing any form of treatment for the past few years. I have generally learned to manage them reasonably well (e.g. turn down the volume from 10 to 5). I have a good job and have generally done well; however, i do struggle from time to time.

Over the past 6-8 months, I have felt myself really slipping backwards. I am really struggling to maintain focus on anything and I often feel drained of motivation. It's gotten to the point that it is affecting my life significantly - both personally and my ability to do my job well. This has further been compounded by my role at work evolving so that I am doing more of the kind of task that I find most challenging. I feel tremendously unhappy, unmotivated and helpless. I have also frequently been feeling what I think is dissociation - I feel stuck inside of my head and like my brain and body aren't one and the same, or like I'm not actually part of the world around me. This is something that I haven't really felt on this level before.

And the COVID-19 situation isn't helping (anxiety, changed work environments/some time working at home), etc. I feel tremendous guilt that, despite being one of the lucky ones that still has a job, I'm struggling to keep motivated and actually do my job well. I'm also not sure if it's appropriate for me to seek help for my psychological difficulties at a time when there are bigger issues for health professionals, etc to deal with.

I'm frustrated to find myself in this position once again, and I don't want to end up falling into as dark of places as I have in the past. I know I need to seek help, but I really don't know how to go about it here in Australia. I do not have an established safety net here in Australia like I did in my home country, and I don't know where to go to get the support I need. I don't even have a regular GP here. I am also a member of the LGBTQI+ community and I don't live in a large city where I feel there are significant queer-friendly resources available.

Any guidance on how I can move forward in this situation would be greatly appreciated, as I'm feeling at a bit of a loss at the moment.

[Peppermintbach]

Hi Houndstooth,

I sense how lost & alone you might be feeling right now. You sound discouraged, worried & on edge...

I think you were brave to make that decision to move here to Australia. But I also realise that comes with unique challenges, such as losing your safety net...

My parents & most of my older extended family members are all migrants. It was a huge transition process...

They all love Australia, but it was still challenging for them...I didn’t realise how hard it was for them when I was growing up. But now, as an adult, I “get it”...

The past 6-7 months for you sound particularly challenging. I imagine your work morale has been affected by your evolving job role. So I think it’s no wonder you’re struggling to find motivation & feeling drained...I would probably feel the same way too if it was me...

I think COVID-19 is understandably playing on your mind a lot. I think the uncertainty of it all can be very distressing...

About what you said, I feel it’s absolutely appropriate for you to seek help. What you’re feeling is important & valid...

I understand it’s easy to compare problems & question whether our own struggles deserve attention & help. But I feel regardless of what other people are/aren’t going through, it doesn’t take away from our own struggles...

Just as my struggles are real, so are yours...I hope that gives you some gentle reassurance 🙂

On the more practical side of things, I think you’ve made a great start by reaching out here on Beyondblue. Well done!

I think a great next step would be to consider contacting your GP to book an extended appointment. It’s likely that it will be via FaceTime, Skype or other video chat, as I believe many GPs are opting for that due to COVID-19.

I would suggest telling them about your mental health/struggles & asking about the Mental Health Care Plan. If deemed appropriate, it entitles you to a no. of Medicare rebatable psychologist visits. Also, due to COVID-19, I believe extra mental health services are available on various platforms. So I would suggest asking your GP about what they would recommend.

The support services for the LGBTIQ+ community sounds very limited where you live. I imagine that must make you feel very alone & isolated...I feel you would want to talk to people who “get it.”

I’ve seen some lovely forum members on Beyondblue who are part of the LGBTIQ+ community recommending QLife. I don’t know too much about it, but I imagine it’s worth looking up online 🙂

Kindness & care,

Pepper