Therapy helps, but still alone at the end of the day

[Ocelot1771]

Hi,

Just wondering whether anyone else experiences this and whether they can give any advice. I'm going through a bad patch in my life and I've lapsed into a pretty dark depression and sense of hopelessness. To make matters worse, I feel very isolated because I don't have a 'best buddy' that I can call every day that 'normal' people seem to have, and my support network is very limited (I do have a long-term partner but I don't want to just depend on him). I read plenty of tips online for how to help yourself during depression and the common advice is to reach out to friends and family, but what if you don't really have much of friends or family to reach out to in the first place?? I've started counselling, and while I'm at the session it seems to help and I walk out feeling good, but it's only for an hour once a week and in between I still have the reality of my lonely life to contend with. These online help forums help a bit too and thankfully they exist, but it's not the same as having a true face-to-face connection with people. Does anyone else feel this way? Just feel so alone.

[BlueBen]

Hi Ocelot1771,

Firstly welcome to the forum, lots of very kind and helpful people on here.

I 100% totally understand where you are coming from in the loneliness part in between counseling and not having the “one on one” to speak with as I am in a similar situation (albeit minus the significant other)

I have found this forum is a great place to vent, ask questions and get support in these times in between counseling

Sharing depression and anxiety with friends and even family can be problematic so here where you have a sense of anonymity can sometimes help.

all the best

BlueBen

[DSPicableMe]

Have you tried joining a social/community group, or volunteering? getting out and involved with something that's enjoyable, may lift your mood.

I joined a local mental health wellness group, but not because I needed help with coping with mental health issues as much. Even though what they teach are things I've heard many times before, they also get together for a coffee, and the group meetings are worth more to me than the content is, as the social interaction is what helps most.

I completely understand the being alone at the end of the day part. I'm also have very few family members. Soon I'll have one left, my sister. I keep myself busy with hobbies, or learning a new skill. If I'm not feeling motivated to do that, then I play online strategy games because a lot of them are played by the older generation and live chat. The feeling of emptiness, and hopelessness is something I know all too well, but trying to build social interactions and even finding distractions can help a lot.

[Ocelot1771]

Thanks for your reply DSP. I know I have to have to get out there and do things, it's just that I feel really stuck at the moment, I've lost my mojo and I really doubt myself. I know this goes hand-in-hand with depression though, so it's a matter of being brave and just doing something, anything. The irony is, everyone thinks I've got everything going for me.......I've got a good job, a partner, a nice home to live in, nice looking, etc, etc.....but I'm a mess and I'm lonely as hell. Thanks anyway for your response, it does help knowing I'm not the only one and that people are out there to help.

[Ocelot1771]

You're right BlueBen, sometimes it is problematic sharing depression with friends and family (as I've found) so these forums do definitely help.