Post Fathers Day Sadness. Lonelines and Struggling

Beaser · ‎08-09-2022

Hi to everyone and best wishes. I have found myself feeling very sad and lonely after Fathers Day. Im a 56 year old man but i still miss my Father and find these days so hard. Im not a Father myself so i guess its loneliness as well. I split with my girlfriend in Aprill and i just have this constant feeling that i need to contact her. I havent done so for ten days but i just so want to. All my friends tell me not to but i just feel so lonely after the weekend and feel the need to reach out. I have posted regularly this year so i hope thats ok.. I was wondering if anyone has any similar feelings or advice.. My best wishes to all Beaser.

Petal22 · ‎08-09-2022

Hi Beaser,

Lovely to hear from you and I’m sorry you are feeling this way I understand it’s hard.

I understand you would miss your own father they are such a support in our lives.

If you want to call your girlfriend you split from that’s totally up to you……. I understand your friends have told you not to but it’s not their decision it’s yours.

You are welcome to post on this forum as many times as you like.

We are always happy to hear from you 😊

geoff · ‎09-09-2022

Hello Beaser, someone being in your position you would definitely miss your father and that can be very difficult to accept, I'm sorry for you.

If you want to contact your girlfriend that's a decision you need to make, but there has been no contact with her in the last 10 days and whether this has been because you haven't done so or perhaps she decided not to, or it's only been you to have contacted her, then please be careful.

May be you send her a text and see if you get a response, could be easier for you, but just look after yourself.

Geoff.

Life Member.

Beaser · ‎09-09-2022

Thank you Petal.

Its always great to hear from you and i really respect and value what you say . I know that im not alone in missing my father and family in general.

And i guess its obvious that its increased my loneliness and made me miss my ex girlfriend even more . I know its my decision not to call or not. I am just scared of pushing her further away and even becoming annoying to her. I have to respect her feelings and that is probably that she wants to be left alone.

Thanks again Petal. I am very happy to talk more. I wish you a Happy Day.

Beaser · ‎09-09-2022

Thans Geoff.

I always love to hear from you and thank you.

I always miss my Dad and Fathers Day is always tough particularly with my life events at the monent.

I think your right about the text if i do make contact ,maybe even in a jovial and Happy way . As you say i need to be careful and protect myself.

Your a great contributor to these forums and i am one of many who really value and am thankful for it. Have a Happy Day Geoff.

Petal22 · ‎09-09-2022

That’s ok Beaser 😊

I understand in regards to your ex but as Geoff has said please be careful and look after yourself.

A relationship even with a friend should go both ways you should get back what you put in.

Sometimes I believe if we aren’t getting back what we put it then our energy can be put else where in a positive way.

You could start by putting your energy into other places and in turn meet new people and maybe a special person along the way.

Your person is out there and this person will want to give you back what you put in.

Beaser · ‎10-09-2022

Thank you Petal.

Just been a tough time of late . Im going out today to the footy so at least im getting out. I think the heart of it all is that im just so lonely at times. I think thats why i felt the need to see friends when i was with my girlfriend.I just felt i needed that connection that i dont have family wise. If that makes sense. Hope you have a Happy Day. Brett.

Petal22 · ‎10-09-2022

That’s ok Beaser 😊

I hope you enjoyed the football.

Its great that you are getting out and about.

I understand that feeling lonely would be hard at times and I understand that you want connection.

Have you thought about joining any new groups or hobbies where you can meet new people and feel more connected?

ecomama · ‎10-09-2022

Dear Brett, I'm sorry your Father's Day was tough missing your dad. Hugs.

Do you want to talk about your dad?

I just read a reply on my thread as I went to a Memorial today for an absolutely wonderful man (certainly not my father), the loss of this man has hit me really hard. He meant so much to everyone.

The reply was spot on.... that he was worth grieving for.

Your dad sounds like he was very much worth grieving for too.

Simultaneously to being SO sad about the loss of this man today, it was my father's birthday. My Uncle usually sends me a text today as HE grieves the loss of his brother. He didn't today.

Did you want to tell me a story about your dad?
Was he funny?
Did he like the footy like you do? (or is that a stupid question lol?)

I'd bet my house that he was a great dad. Do you know why?
Because he raised a GREAT son.

You're compassionate and caring, kind and ever so polite.

Thinking of you
EM

Beaser · ‎11-09-2022

Thanks Ecomama.

Thank You for your kind reply.

My father was a great man he was returned service man and he was a kind gentle man who put others before himself. He did love the footy but we barracked for different teams.

He was a funny man who loved a joke but some of them werent as good as he thought LOL.

I miss him so much . Im pretty lost at the moment i feel i have no one and that i ruined my relationship with my girlfriend by being insecure and jealous because of certain things that i shouldnt have.

I encouraged her to have her friends male and female . Its just when she stayed friends and texted with ex guys that she met online i didnt handle it and i regret it. I never got angry certainly or even raised my voice but i just got upset... Have i been a bad person for that i feel i have. I hope you have a Happy Day. Love to talk more if you felt ok with it. Brett.