Overwhelming level of apathy

[Ken]

Hi,

I wake up every morning not feeling any emotions at all. I go to uni and I do moderately good with my subjects. I feel however, no excitement nor happiness in anything. My mind tells me what I should to what's the logical choice to make (study, do assignments etc), although I have no associated feelings towards the actions I make. Most of the time I can cope with this, but sometimes this intense apathy seems to lean towards negative emotions or negative thoughts which can be pretty overwhelming sometimes. I'm pretty certain I have no desire to end my life, but at the same time I don't care whether I die or not. I feel like I need to talk about it. I honestly wish I could feel something. If someone has any advice that doesn't consist of empty encouragements, that would be extremely helpful.

[The_Real_David_Charles]

Dear Ken,

Do you swim ?  Instead of over thinking have you considered taking a dip in a heated pool ?  To just float there and let all your thoughts drift.   Just saying.

Or you could visit the University Counsellors and do a bit of a heart to heart.   You'll need their support if your work gets behind - they can arranged extensions, etc.

When I was a London University (back in the dark ages - 1981/84) I had the same thing but it was more financial.   All English degrees were FREE at the time and Thatcher hadn't changed the system to user pays.   Honestly, I remember countless coffee chats where students who weren't paying for ANYTHING just wasted their time with inane conversation:  "Have you put in that essay for old Forsyth yet ?  Nah, neither have I"  [shock, horror].  And then the punch line "I haven't even begun it yet" with smug unsmugness.    Days of Glory, my friend.

Did you go to the careers office and get excited about your career or life after University ?   Maybe your subconscious is smarter than you think.   It knows you've only got a handful of uni years to be apathetic in.   The real world really doesn't have that luxury.   Make sure you visit the pool on the Womans' Polo Training Sessions.  For full therapeutic value.  Don't get mixed up with the over 55's aqua-aerobics session.  There are some things a young man shouldn't see.

Adios, David.

[Vegetarian Marshmallow]

Do you have goals?  Why did you start uni?  To be a geneticist, teacher, mathematician?  To simply learn more about the subjects that interest you?

Do you have things to look forward to in the day-to-day?  Seeing friends?  Seeing a band?  Your weekly knitting group convene?  Your favourite TV show on a Tuesday?

[Hayley]

Hi Ken,

Strictly from my own experience it sounds like you are running on auto pilot and that if you don't go and seek some professional help for what to me sounds like from what you have described is possibly depression you will break down. Your body is trying to tell you something. It sounds like you are listening to it now the hard part I know is going to do something about it. I don't know if keeping a journal is something you have thought about it can help to get on paper what's going around on in your head. Going on the thought that our feelings come from our thoughts. Take care.