new here can't function on meds....

[always_blue]

hi my name is simon I'm 53 yrs old and bipolar.

i have over theyears had 20 or so episodes none of which were good.

now I'm stable on a drug usually for schitzoprenia.

whilst being stable is good the side effects aren't. I'm currently in a depressed state.

i can't get out of bed to face the day.. I'm flatline with no desire physical mental sexual.. there is nothing.

i spend my days killing time wondering what to do next, with o desire to do anything.

I'm currently seeking help went to my gp looking for a psychiatrist earliest appointment 2 years can you believe it.

im desperate and at a loss as to how to turn all this around.

not even walking the dogs seems an option i just can't be bothered ,

anyone else suffer the same? my life is a big fat 0. nothing am suicidal but would never do it i don't have the courage.

hope to hear from someone?

thanks

[Guest_322]

Hi Simon,

I don't have bipolar or schizophrenia so I'm not sure if I'm the best person to reply. But your thread struck a chord with me as a relative of mine has schizophrenia and he has suffered a lot so I really feel for you.

What I can empathise with is the flatline feeling. I've had that before and it's horrendous in its own right. It's like you just go through the motions and feel like a zombie.

I'm glad you're seeing a GP but the wait for the psychiatrist is ridiculous. 2 years?!

Suicidal thoughts can be very intrusive and find us during dark times. I really hope that if you ever get to a point where you feel like you can't cope and want to act on those thoughts, please reach out. It can be to a trusted friend or family member or a helpline. Just someone.

In the mean time, hang in there. You're a legend for soldiering on despite everything that you're struggling with.

- Dottie

[white knight]

Hi Simon, welcome

Sorry to hear this. I know the feeling well. Am bipolar 2 and depression.

I have swung in and out of that feeling for many years. In desperation I got my GP approval to adjust my medication up then down to see if the medication dosage wasn't working for me.

I went up and it got worse, then over time went lower and presto. Fabulous result. My wife said "I've got my husband back".

But I stress it was done under the doctors supervision. Its no good being a zombie, a happy medium is best, for me anyway. Our individual circumstances are different if course.

good luck.

Tony WK

[always_blue]

Hi Dottie thanks for your reply.... no I'm not suicidal... just think about it sometimes... truth is i don't have the courage to go through with it so it won't happen. yea going through the motions.. its monday morning I'm out of bed soon to go back.. theres nothing to do for me except reply on this forum.i have halfed my medication in the hope this gives me some spark? i just don't know.i hate my life theres no point to it... its live breath smoke eat watch tv. the olympics are over now so theres nothing to watch.bye for now.... simon.

[always_blue]

Hi Tony i don't know what type of bipolar i have never been told... mine is like this.. i go high with racing thoughts and get myself into quite a tiz out of reality it never happens without severe consequences and is quite debilitating.. can't say i swing low except maybe my current state is called manic Low? i don't know. well your wife saying she got her husband back is good to hear and gives me hope my wife says she lost her husband years ago and the marriage just goes through the motions... I'm lowering my dose of meds in the hope this gives me some spark... really think the meds are to blame for my flattening lifestyle.i would love to hear my wife say WOW i got my husband back... i feel terrible about it all. my gp its back on the 6th september and maybe we can alter the meds.. he's not a psyche though and is slow to mess with it.. just i can't get to see a psych for some time.

thanks for your reply tony ill keep my chin up

[Airies]

Hi Simon,

53 also, diagnosed bipolar type 1 last year and similar journey to yours. There are many in the same boat.Have had thoughts of suicide . Thank god for my son and the timely intervention of some others.The right meds help, as does counselling and other interventions.Its a matter of getting things right. Easier said then done but give it time. Lots of support from fellow sufferers here

cheers Len