If you have never suffered from depression I don't expect you to understand it, you can't. That is not meant as a put down, it's just fact. It's like I cannot understand what it's like to be gay or black etc. What I can do, is accept that these things that I don't understand are a part of the world I live in and support those that struggle with their issues. Depression can be frightening to those that have never had it. Having the blues and feeling down is something that we all go through and in no way can be compared to clinical depression. Depression is hard to describe, but one way it can be expressed is like a Black Dog. There can be times when that dog will attack, overwhelm, have you down on the ground ripping at your heart and your throat until you reach a point that you want to succumb. It is physical pain. Then, when you receive help, medication, support, you fight back, you tame the dog, teach it to sit quietly and calmly. Understand though, that the black dog never dies, it is always there, ready to spring at you again and attack if it is not kept under control. This is the fear that depression sufferers feel every single day, that it might attack again, and at various times it does. It is a skill you need to learn to recognise when the black dog is stirring, ready to attack. This may sound ridiculous and fanciful if you haven't been down there, but it is only my description of it. Be there when you can and listen, don't try to offer answers, just support. Also recognise please, that if a depression sufferer is upset, angry, sad, that these emotions are not necessarily caused by the depression, sometimes we have valid reasons for these feelings, as does everyone else. Don't look at us and think 'oh it's the depression' I suffer from depression, yes, but I am not defined by it.
beyondblue’s clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.
