Left family and friends to move interstate

[Buzmel]

Hi, my husband and I have moved interstate and have left our 2 children ( both adults) and our beautiful 3 year old granddaughter. My mum does live in the same suburb but that is not why we moved. We moved for something different as we had no ties and thought why not.  We had to live in a caravan park for 6 weeks until we found a house to buy.  Since moving here I am severely depressed, I miss my friends, kids and especially my granddaughter.  I cry almost everyday (my husband doesnt know) I have no friends, I hate my job and there are no others as its a small town.  When I speak with my friends from interstate they dont understand what and how I am feeling.  I cant speak to mum as she says it will get better, she has done the same thing etc etc. Im not coping at all.  I feel some days im doing stupid things like putting things in the wrong place ie. I make a coffee and go to put sugar in the fridge or a completely different cupboard.  The list goes on and on.  I just want to know if anyone else has gone or going through the same thing,  I really need help, Im so sad.

[white knight]

Hi, welcome

You might be interested that one reason I left home was to get away from Melbourne. I hated the city. I joined the RAAF and travelled around. Like you I missed my friends and Melbourne footy etc.

In your post you didnt mention the core reason for moving. This could influence my post because some people move away due to other people harassing them. In those cases I usually suggest that moving 2 suburbs away has the same result as you never bump into those people anyway and you retain your friends and family.

Your move interstate likely wont settle (Eg you feel its home) for several years and you'll need to travel back regularly to see your granddaughter as her parents will be too busy to visit you as in a typical young family situation is.

So my suggestion if it was me would be to accept the mistake made and return however, you dont have to return to your old town but an hour up the road so you can keep easy ties with your old life.

Is that a possibility for you? 

In regards to your lack of focus this is often the symptoms felt with depression so when you find relief from your living situation those symptoms usually subside. It would still be wise yo have a GP visit though, like my reply here, a response from a GP would give you more clarity and another opinion in your quest for a remedy to this problem.

Is there a reason for hiding your emotions from your husband? Is he content in his new home/town?

TonyWK 

[geoff]

Hello Buzmel, we tend to want to move for various reasons believing it would be much better, however, we don't realise what it actually means until it's happened and even while this is being done, these thoughts begin to doubt whether you have done the right thing.

No words such as 'it will get better' will dampen this feeling and living in a caravan is not going to help ether, although now you have a house.

It would be best to discuss this with your husband, hiding it will only increase these feelings, because it does seem as though you want to be lose to your granddaughter.

I only wish I was close to my 2 granddaughters but where they are is lose to both parent and my situation is different.

What you could try is move back for a couple of days and if you mood improves then you know what you need to do.

Geoff.

Life Member.