I think my depression is getting worse.

[megaownz]

Hi everyone.  Just joined tonight.  Why?  Because I need to talk about my depression, which I think is getting worse. I've had a few reasons in the last few years to be sad. After years of motherhood my children have all left home now.  I think they call it "Empty Nest Syndrome".  Add to that, Menopause has come into full bloom....hot flushes are not for the weak.  My mother died 2 years ago now and then my mother-in-law died in hospital last November with me holding her hand.  God bless her.

I added up all these stress factors in my head and can see why I'm so sad.  I'm grieving I guess.  I have a kind husband who bravely listens to me..  I have no friends and unfriendly brothers and a sister. I have a part-time job that keeps some of my week occupied.  I don't love my job but I'm grateful to have employment at this time of my life. 

I've started exercising as I read it helps with depression.  It really helps but I'm very sensitive and I've never really been any good at anything in my life.  I'm not attractive and I haven't got a sparkly bubbly personality like some popular people do.  I largely get ignored or people just talk over the top of me if I'm telling a story.  I try not to wallow in my depression too much so I read books, listen to upbeat music and try to keep my days occupied.  

It's nice to have a forum where I can vent.  Thanks for reading this.  I'll write again soon.

[Q_O_P]

Megaownz,

Hi.  Welcome to Beyond Blue.  It seems you have certainly come to the right place.  Everyone here is just so caring, understanding, non-judgemental.  I think it has to do with the fact that we all have our own issues that many people don't, or choose not to, understand.

So sorry for your losses.  I'm glad you have your husband who listens.  My ex refused to acknowledge there was anything wrong with me - probably one contributing reason as to why he is my ex.  I now have a loving supportive husband, who I know I don't appreciate enough.  He took on me and my two children and as much as I told him, he didn't want to take on my luggage, he refused to turn away.

I would like to make a bet that those popular people aren't all living perfect lives either.  Prettiness and bubbles don't always make for success and happiness.  Don't bring yourself down - I feel, through reading your words, you are a beautiful person and that is the most important thing.

I, to, have faced (pretty much all my life) the challenge of people talking over me, asking me something then blatantly turning away showing no interest or concern what so ever.  It is because of that, I tend to keep my opinions to myself and then come across as a coat tailer.  It is so upsetting.

(sorry if I seemed to have made this all about me, I just wanted you to learn that you're not alone.  I have already come across so many mirrored lives through this forum.  It's "nice" to know we're not the only ones who feels these things)

I wish you all the best megaownz.  xx

[geoff]

dear Megaownz, lovely for you to join this site, and I hope that you haven't been stewing on whether to post a comment or not, because everyone is welcome here.

My sincere condolences for your the loss of your mum and mother in law.

My wife (ex) wasn't with me when she had to go through menopause so I'm sorry I haven't experienced it, but I do know the symptoms.

When our children leave home it does create an empty space, so how many did you have, and do they keep in contact with you on a regular basis.

These people who over talk you aren't worth associating with, because they are too dominating and not worth your friendship. L Geoff. x