Hey all,
I'm 31, 2 kids (9 and 4, both autistic).
Diagnosed post-natal depression aged 24.
Depressed from age 15, anxiety from age 5.
My son's therapists when he was being diagnosed with Autism said that I would be diagnosed Aspergers (now autism) if I'd been assessed.
I've just come out of an almost-9 year relationship with a guy, who got more and more verbally abusive and controlling as the years went by, and escalated to his worst once we'd split (almost 3 months ago now). He finally moved out 2 weeks ago.
I also lost my close friend around the same time - she got angry because I was being "selfish" and focused on fixing my life after my breakup, rather than "being there" for her (she also has depression) and sent me a hate-filled letter blaming me for her feeling suicidal.
So that's my basic story. Lots more to it, but that's the main stuff.
My depression has been medicated on and off for years, my last medication was about 2 years ago. I've been coping reasonably well without it, other than the last few months since the breakup. My new boyfriend is amazing, but he just doesn't always seem to get that I can't pull myself out of it. I'm trying, I really am, but it's not that easy. Granted, I do a lot of things that make my depression worse, like read the blog of my ex-friend. It's almost a compulsion.
The thoughts of
self- harm are hard to ignore, but I AM ignoring them. I' m not suicidal, but self- harm has been one of my coping strategies for years - it's been about 5 weeks since I did, and before that it had been about 6 years.
My depression is by no-means under control, but it's under control enough that I don't do anything silly. I have days where I cry and cry, but I can pull myself out of it enough to have a semi-normal life. And my kids are always well cared-for, even on my bad days.
Hi all 🙂
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