Recently I have been in a depressive slump. Bored out of my mind, lonely, upset, numb, essentially the works of what it means to be depressed.
But I mean, just last week I was over the moon. I’m in the rehearsal stage of my first production ever, i moved rooms to something more roomy, I got to see a friend i hadn’t seen in a while and talk to teammates.
The other night i was feeling like shit. I messaged that friend about whether they considered us friends. they wouldn’t give me an answer and it made me spiral a little. i flipped between laughing to numb and just was all over the place (this was late like 2am which may have contributed) but i hadn’t felt that desperate and just terrible in a long time.
i also feel bad at coming to them when i have a problem because it isn’t their responsibility to help me. i feel like a burden and just overall selfish.
