I feel as if I cannot tell anybody how down I am because I will just annoy them

[LexyB1993]

I have just registered. I have never been one to talk about my feelings so I suppose I have registered out of desperation. I feel as if I cannot tell anybody how down I am because I will just annoy them, I don't want to be a burden on my family and friends.

I've gone from having good days and bad days to just having bad days. I can't get off the couch. I don't socialise anymore, I cant even respond to something as small as a text message. My feelings have changed from sadness to nothing at all. I don't care about anything anymore. I get desperate for human contact but I just cant make a phonecall.

I don't know what I need. Ive been seeing a psychologist for 3 years. Two weeks ago I started back on medication again. I guess im just tired of feeling so alone. I see everyone else so happy and it makes me feel like a freak. Why cant I just be happy like them? Please help, I feel like I have nowhere else to go.

[Neil_1]

Dear Lelouch

Welcome to Beyond Blue and thank you for coming here and providing your post.  Well done on coming here and registering because here you can do exactly what you've just done and unload and what you'll receive back is care, guidance (if possible) and above all else, support.

I would like to pick you up on one thing though - when you say, why can't I be happy like everyone else?!  You know, I see other people as well and for the most part, they all look happy as well - but are they really?  Perhaps they're walking around with their own "depression masks" on - which hide away the true inner feelings.  But enough about others - we need to concentrate on you.

That is good that you've commenced back on meds (are they prescribed by your GP or your psyche?).  As they may have told you (or you may already know) meds do take a number of weeks before their real effects start kicking in - somewhere between the 4-6 week range.

Do you have family/friends that are close by?    A job??   Another biggie is, do you have a pet?  They can be heaps beneficial for us who suffer, because you don't have to answer to them and no matter how you're feeling, they'll be pleased to see you everytime.

I look forward to hearing back from you.

Kind regards

Neil

[geoff]

dear Lelouch, I had replied to you when BB website was having trouble, so I can't quite remember what I said as the second reply is never as good as the first.

I have to agree with Neil and that people are all walking around with smiles on their face, but are they all happy, we don't know.

I'm also pleased that you have started your medication, but there must have been a reason why you stopped, and I would presume it was because of side-effects.

You would know that there are different types of AD's so hopefully they have given you a different type.

What I am concerned about are these 'good days and then bad days', so I would like you to ask your doctor about maybe having bipolar depression, or perhaps you could google it.

If the medication you have started on again is the same type then it shouldn't take too long to kick in, but if it's another type then you may have to wait a few weeks for any effect.

The reason why you can't respond to any text or phone call is because depression has got a grip on you.

Hope you can reply back to us. Geoff.