I am struggling to deal with it.

[august2001]

Good Morning,

I have never done this before and I am a little bit nervous to do it.

I have known for a little while that I have depression but I have started feeling like I have anxiety and bipolar issues to and I don't know how to deal with it.

I have never told my doctor because I feel embarrassed and I struggle to tell my family and friends because also I feel really embarrassed. When I try to talk to my partner about it it makes me sad because he doesn't understand how I feel and he doesn't really believe in mental illnesses.

At the moment I am really struggling to just get out of bed and to actually do work. I get home from work at 5:30 and sleep all the way until 7:30 in the morning because I don't want to get up. I have gained 15 kilos in 3 months because I am comfort eating. and I am ruining my realtiosnhips with my partner because I struggle to do day to day tasks. I get so incredibly angry every day. I will go from really happy to angry in about a minute. my mood swings are terrible and some days I really struggle just walking. which is terrible and I realise I really need help for that but also I have no one to talk to about it all. and I wish I just had a friend to talk to about this all but also I feel like they would think I am attention seeking.

I just don't know how to feal with it and I wish I did because it is ruining everything around me and I want to be happy again.

I don't understand why my partner doesn't car either. I think he thinks I am going through a stage but im not I feel as though I really am depressed and it makes me a terrible person to be around.

[Sujema]

As someone diagnosed with Clinical Depression, (MDD), I understand your feelings of helplessness, and your reluctance to take the first step of reaching out for professional help. But continuing to internalise those distressing feelings, will be very toxic to you Pysically and Mentally.

It is not a sign of weekness, it takes a person of great courage admit they need help.

I wish you peace of mind,

Susan

[CeeBea]

Hi August2001,

I have struggled with chronic depression and anxiety for as long as I can remember throughout my childhood and adolescence; hiding the horrible feelings and thoughts that went through my mind every day.

It then morphed into an eating disorder, and dropping to a very low weight. This was never diagnosed until later when things got so bad that I nearly ended things. This was when I finally got some professional help, saw a psychiatrist, and got a diagnosis, and started the journey of unravelling that nasty she-wolf on my shoulder. I will never get rid of that voice, but I can manage her better most of the time.

Good on you for reaching out, and I do encourage you to keep talking with your partner; it is important that those close and dear to you support you through your journey of learning how to cope. Try and plan things each day (even if it's just going for a walk around the block, reading a book outside) for yourself.