Hi J1992
It's a horrible feeling, that feeling of standing smack bang in the middle of crossroads not knowing which way to go. If you can imagine, there you are in the middle of nowhere, in the middle of crossroads, without a guide or any signposts. Standing still has a real feel to it, that's for sure. Can feel so depressing at times, especially when we've been there for a while. With the idea that we're not designed to stand still for too long, the question becomes 'Which way to go?'.
What would a process of elimination look like? Obviously you can't go back, you can't keep going forward on this same path based on it being too depressing. Taking the path on the left may not be an option, especially if it's going to lead to drugs, which is not your thing. This leaves the path on the right. What does the right path look like? James touches on the significance of guidance, in mentioning guidance from a good psychologist. Perhaps the right path is about developing forms of guidance and greater self understanding. Perhaps it's about better understanding why you think and feel the way you do. If you're more a soulful person, perhaps it could be about looking into psychospiritual development or counseling in some form. Whatever works.
Imagine you have all these different facets to you, just chomping at the bit, waiting to come to life. There is the adventurer in you, the risk taker (to a healthy degree), the lover, the part of you that tells the people pleaser in you to take a back seat when you're serving everyone except yourself. Imagine there is the extreme sports person (not just the sports person) who wants to go parachuting. Imagine there are dozens of facets to who you are and you've only, up to this point, touched on a handful. On the path to greater self understanding, imagine what parts you could come to meet with. Btw, the parent in us can come to life at any time. There's no set time. I was 32 when I had my 1st child. My sister was 19 when she had her 1st child. My brother became a 1st time parent just a couple of years ago at 56.
Not sure whether you're much of a reader. I've found a good read to be 'Insanely Gifted - Turn your demons into creative rocket fuel' by Jamie Catto. Catto touches on his serious struggles with mental health and his mastery over dark internal dialogue, those inner demons that can definitely make life hell on earth at times.
