here we go again

[BLACK_BEAN]

After many years of being manageable the depression has come back with a vengeance. To the point of tears on Sunday. Had a great talk with my partner to let her know where I am at. From that point things changed,and was feeling much better, but today can feel that mood changing. Just want this to stop. 

[Zeal]

Hello Black Bean,

I’m sorry to hear you’ve had a depression flare-up. Do you know what could have triggered this, or are you under intense pressure lately? Sometimes a huge life change can trigger old mental health problems. This has happened for me with anxiety. It’s great that you’ve had a good talk with your partner about this – open communication is the best way to deal with this situation. So good on you!

In order to nip in the bud this plunge back into depression, seeing your GP is a great idea. They can refer you to a counsellor or psychologist for more specific help. You’ve already done a great thing in coming to this forum! I’ve had mild to moderate depression before, but that was in my early teens. Hopefully others with more experience of depression will give you some extra advice :)

Good luck, and take care

SM

[Neil_1]

Hi there Black Bean

Welcome to Beyond Blue and thank you for coming here and providing your post.

May I ask in the past, how were you able to manage your depression?   Did you have gp appointments, counselling sessions, perhaps meds that you took?

Prior to Sunday when was your last gp appointment and also, IF you were on anti-depressants, did you go off them, or are you still taking them?

Do you feel there some kind of catalyst that happened on Sunday to you to cause the tears brewing up?    In my own case, I feel an overwhelming desire in the days and even weeks leading up to a certain time to cry, but just cannot – so did you feel like things were building up for you, or was it a case of something happened on Sunday and whooshka, the tears began to flow?

Do hope to hear back from you.

Neil

[BLACK_BEAN]

Thanks everyone for your advice,

I do feel it builds up to the point. I recognise this but an unable to stop it. Have been on medication before but had bad experience with it. Just feels like I've gone back 10 years. 

[BLACK_BEAN]

People are just bleeding me dry. 

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[BLACK_BEAN]

Just gets to the point of I had enough 

[Neil_1]

Hi there Black Bean

Can you please write back - let us know how you're going?

Was your weekend, good, bad, indifferent?

Please write back soon.

Kind regards

Neil

[AshleighGee]

I feel like I experience this every few months, at the very end of 2012 I began to have my first bout of depression and it was very terrible, new and scary. People around me noticed and it was not good. That went on for about 6 months and I didn't ask or get any help. Then mid 2013 I had a very good 3 months, then back to the way it was. This time I got frustrated and upset and I started to get help and I took the first step by telling my mum and I went to the doctors and began medication and counselling early 2014. 2014 was a good year of change and it was well and so was I, I had that clarity in my brain and I grew a lot. Anxiety did kick in quite badly mid year and went on for a few months (I think it was induced by the medication, antidepressant). I was doing very very well. in December 2014 I slowly weaned off the antidepressant after a full year of use and I felt my brain un-cloud in a way? The medication didn't make me someone else but I realise that I wasn't fully myself, positive or negative effect I'm not sure. At the begging of school 2015 after a full year of recovery I begun to 'relapse' and it saddened me because I knew what was ahead, I got very unwell for the first 3-4 months of 2015. I'm doing my best and continuously working on this and I'm interested to see how my 'illness' will affect me throughout my life, if I eventually move away from my current non-desirable situation will I fully recover? when I finish school will I be better? when I can drive will I be better? will it just be one of those things that just linger in my life every few months that I have to push through? Every day I learn more from my depression/anxiety. I'm not a lost soul and I have a purpose, I'm bitter and the chemicals in my brain are out of balance but I'm just one of those things that takes time.

[Neil_1]

Hi there AshleighGee

And welcome to Beyond Blue.

Thanx for providing your post and from the sound of it, you’re fairly young (in that (A) you’re still in school and (B) you’re of a driving age as yet).

It is great that you’ve got these symptoms addressed and that you’re working on plans to battle it and that you’re trying hard to beat it or at least keep it at bay.

You know, it could just be the current situation that you’re experiencing – and on this site, we get a fair number of younger posters coming here to unload with their issues and troubles, so please also know that you’re not on your own with what you’re experiencing.

When you say non-desirable situation – are you referring to school or something perhaps in your home life?  You actually don’t need to answer this if you don’t feel comfortable in doing so, it’s just that if it’s school, then again you aren’t on your own with these issues.

Would love to hear back from you on this.

Kind regards

Neil

[geoff]

dear Black Bean, I have just been reading some posts that I haven't responded toand found yours, and I'm so sorry that I haven't been here to help you with SM and Neil my good friends in their support for you, which is indeed a very serious post that needs all our assistance.

I would dearly love for you to get back to us, as it's been 3 days since you posted, and in depression that's a long time, so please just post something so that we know you are OK.

(AshleighGee I will reply to you.) Geoff.