Help -What do you do to help when you feel overwhelmed?

[Mel_depressed_times]

I don't know if this is the right forum for this thread but I was wondering if anyone had any helpful advice or anything.

I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety when I was 14 and am now almost 30, it has not gotten better, if anything it has gotten worse. I was diagnosed with PTSD after a sexual assault a few years ago, and I am struggling.

My partner is super supportive of me, my family is understanding and only ever wants to help. I am medicated and not currently in counselling though have not found it hugely helpful.

I am tired all the time, I could not be bothered doing anything, my performance at work is slipping and my anxiety is rising. I become so frustrated and overwhelmed that today I stood in my hallway and screamed as I was feeling overwhelmed with the dogs. I often feel like I am screaming in my head anyway but I don't usually physically scream. I don't want to go to work, I want to die, not necessarily kill myself I just don't want to do this anymore, fighting is hard and I am not sure it is worth it, I tried self-harming as that used to relieve the stress a bit but it doesn't help anymore, I have constant headaches and body pain and I just couldn't be bothered.

I used to love cooking and art and all kinds of things, but I just can't be bothered. I feel as though my continued existence is always going to be this crappy I don't want to keep fighting to work 60 hours a week for no benefit, my mood stays the same whether I am poor or have enough to get by, I don't know what to do anymore, I am tired of spending $100 per hour for therapy to be old to keep a diary.

What do you do to help when you feel overwhelmed?

[smallwolf]

Hi. Welcome to beyond blue.

I read that you do not see any benefit in seeing a professional, so to answer your question I can only give you my world view since I started seeing a psychologist. And maybe I have been lucky. This is what my psychologist has gotten em to do...

• meditation (guided vs deep breathing exercises)
• mindfulness exercises (including mindful eating exercises to bring me back to the present)
• provided practical suggestions re issues I have presented to her
• not a diary per se, but things to look forward to each day, pleasures etc. to think about positive things
• exercises to challenge my negative thinking
• exercises to help me get to sleep and sleep better each night
• help me gauge whether I am moving towards or away from my values
• determine what my value are
• helped me determine where thoughts came from
• distraction and coping tools

the changes are slow and incremental. Many, or all the above you could get from a web sites or books. Some people, like me, prefer talking to someone. If your tiredness is related to sleep problems, then being able to empty your brain before going to sleep could help? There is this thing called "sleep hygiene" that my psychiatrist gave me which was quite helpful... why? because I used to go to sleep with work thoughts in my head, and then wake up in the night with the same thoughts stressing me out. So now, I do my reflection in bed, guided meditation and sleep. Which I will do shortly.

Hope that helps,

Tim

[BorderCollie]

Hi Mel,

I can absolutely relate to feelings of tiredness and ‘not being bothered’. I was in a dark place and thought the exact same as you earlier this year.... I didn’t necessarily want to end my life but I knew the effort required to get out of the pit I was in, and seriously questioned if I was up for it.

I’m an athlete though, and I’ve always had an ability to dig really deep when times get tough. Sometimes it’s a bloody struggle and exhausts the shit out of me, but I remind myself to chase that feeling of reward. I know saying this to yourself in this situation may not exactly be helpful, but perhaps a different perspective may enlighten you to a different strategy.

I may not be able to solve all your problems, but I would like to offer you this advice;

-Start really bloody small. Keep it real with yourself. I once set a goal to go buy a bike pump. Did I ride the bike? Nope. Did I even pump up the tyre? Nope. Did I achieve something? Hell yeah I did. You should celebrate with yourself all the minor things. I’m sure your partner and your support network will get around you too.

-Deep breaths. You’ve heard it before, you’ll hear it again. I literally used to hear this and think “what a load of crap”, thinking it offered me nothing. But when I actually tried it, I felt better. Plus, it was aligned with my values and that made me feel like I could achieve a little bit more.

Try to get outside if you can. Sometimes, I sit on my balcony- no phone, just myself. I take in the sounds, hear the pretty birds singing and let my head get immersed in the world around me. Nature can be so therapeutic if you let it be. Even if it’s just for two minutes 🙂

I’d like to finish by saying that I know it can be tough and I am hearing you loud and clear. Being overwhelmed can make you feel like there’s no escape from your current situation. I’m backing you in to prove yourself wrong, you can achieve something every day, I know you can.

Please reach out again if you need to 🙂