Do I have bi-polar?

[sydneyharbour17]

Hi there,

I have recently started seeing a psychologist to help deal with the emotions I have experienced after a particularly painful break-up. It has been very helpful but in becoming more in tune with my emotions through these sessions, I have noticed a few things. Firstly I have noticed that I experience what I could only describe as 'highs' where I am completely satisfied with life, become extremely impulsive, spend a lot of money, have racing thoughts, am very productive and social, become even more loud and talkative than usual (I am an extravert) and sleep very little. Following these episodes, which last anywhere from a few days to a couple of weeks, I usually become extremely down, have negative thoughts, sleep poorly, and yeah just become all round depressed. Again this lasts for anywhere from a few days to a few weeks.

My first depressive episode occurred when I was 15 (I am now nearly 20) and I have had these 'cycles' ever since although sometimes they are not as obvious and they are definitely much worse when I am experiencing severe emotional stress like I am now.

In the past month a have experienced 2 highs and am now entering my 3rd low.

My psychologist has been focussing very heavily on the break up but I would like to move away from that in my next session and explore these feelings further.

Does this sound like bi polar? How do I talk about this with my health professional without him thinking that I am just matching symptoms in my head like a lot of people do when they Google their illnesses? Also if it is bi polar what can be done to treat it?

Regards,

Concerned

[geoff]

hi Sydney, a lot of great replies here and with bipolar is can be controlled with medication, just as depression can, but both of these you have for life, although there could be times when you feel on top of the world, because of medication and therapy you are having, but because you need these you can't say that bipolar or depression has gone, because as soon as you stop your medication then it will come back, as it's always there bubblying under the surface.
Many people who have been taking some type of medication feel as though they are cured so they stop taking their med's, but once again they fall back into the dark circle and wonder why, well the reason they need to keep taking their med's is because these illness's are always with you, even if you don't seem to have it at that moment, it is more than likely to once again pull you down.
Negative thoughts and feeling down, not wanting to go out or see anybody or loss of interest in their hobbies, work and even family are typical signs of being depressed just as self harm is, and Mr. Kennett set up Beyond Blue under the heading of 'mental illness' with the main emphasis on 'depression', and under this there are different sections that fall under this heading, so for me depression is on top of the list and then incorporates all these other types of mental illness.

I've had depression since I was about 6 or so, because I developed OCD and through my entire life (61 yrs)depression has come and visited me on and off frequently, but I am very susceptible for having relapses, and prone to have another one, I hope not.
I haven't really addressed your comment, but the high's and low's would indicate bipolar, but then we can't give you a diagnosis, but when we have had an illness for many years, just as Kaz has had to deal with bipolar, which I am really sorry for her, then maybe we could suggest that you have it.
If you were our sister or brother we would tell them that they need to see their doctor and ask their doctor whether or not you have bipolar. Geoff.

[sydneyharbour17]

Hello again Paul 🙂

Thank you for asking how I have been. To be totally honest with you my current low is in full swing. I feel dreadful from the moment I wake up to when I go to sleep but no one really notices because I'm going to work, doing my assignments, reading, hanging out with friends etc. etc. Basically I'm doing everything I am supposed to be doing but it's not making me feel any better. 😞 I miss my ex dreadfully, too, so that is only making matters worse. But thank you so much for your kind words about my being pro-active and all that. I am definitely not going to give up no matter how bad I am feeling right now! I just wish Friday would hurry up because I feel like I might feel a bit better once I get things off my chest.

Sydney xx

[blondguy]

Hey SH, I understand how close you were to your BF and the pain and grief would still be raw. I was the same in early 2015 after my relationship fell apart. Right now distractions and time are the best healers which you know anyway.

sydneyharbour17 said: "I am definitely not going to give up no matter how bad I am feeling right now!"

I admire your strength SH..Paul 🙂 x

[james1]

Hey Sydney,

I've been following your thread still but I haven't contributed further because I didn't know what to add to everyone's great comments!

I'm sorry to hear your low is back. I can really empathise with you how feel - just doing all things people say you should, but not feeling the benefit.

But you have an amazing attitude. I'm really really impressed by how you're managing this through a difficult break-up which, from my own current experience, can feel very overwhelming. So your attitude to fix the really important stuff - your mood swings - is very inspirational to me.

Just one more day to go! I hope you feel comfortable letting us know how your session goes!

James

[sydneyharbour17]

Hello everyone!

So I had my session yesterday and I felt as though it was a very pivotal one for me.

In terms of the mood swings my psychologist is not overly alarmed at the moment because I am experiencing a difficult time in my life but has asked me to continue to monitor my moods over the next few weeks in order to determine whether or not there is something deeper at play here.

In addition to that, we discussed some of the strategies that I could use in order to combat the trust issues that will naturally occur as a consequence of the relationship with my ex-partner (for those of you who don't know what happened it is in my other thread entitled 'dealing with depressed and apathetic boyfriend'). This was really great as over the past few weeks one of the major causes of my anxiety has been whether or not I could trust a new partner. We also discussed some of the lessons I could take away from the relationship which really helped in putting a positive spin on the situation.

However, the most poignant part of the session was when my psychologist asked me to retake the depression/anxiety symptom test and in the short space of 7 weeks my scores have lowered from almost all 2's and 3's to almost all 1's and 0's. I didn't even realise how far I had come and I was almost in tears.

One question on the questionnaire in particular interested me. It was 'are you aware of a dryness of the mouth?' For the past 8 months, since my relationship with my ex began to fall apart, I have had a dry mouth no matter how much water I drank or chapstick I put on. My psychologist told me that severe anxiety causes this. I was in shock not only because I didn't realise that my anxiety had been that severe and also because my dry mouth went away about a week or two ago!

So overall a very positive session, guys 🙂 My mood has lifted significantly since, especially because afterward I spent the entire day with a great group of friends who made me feel even better than I already did. 🙂

[Kazzl]

Hi Sydney, how great to hear you sounding so positive! Sounds like you have a good psych and you've had a really reassuring session and a good time with your friends. I'm very pleased for you.

I've been keeping a mood diary and it's really instructive to look back and see how things change - it's easy to forget the down days when you're feeling good, and the good days when you're down. And, the thing is that everyone can have up and down days when they're going through a tough time with relationships etc, not just folks with bipolar. I'm think it's really good that your psych didn't want to make a diagnosis yet.

Hope your mood continues to behave itself 😊 and you have a really nice weekend.

Cheers

Kaz

[blondguy]

Hey SH, you sound so much better 🙂

You have a great counselor and good on you for having the personality you do to deal effectively with your recovery :-). You have a rare trait Sydney.

Kaz is spot on with the highs and lows, we all get them and they can be a pain.I have just been through some mega lows (for no reason) and it is a pain.

Your strength is an asset not only to you but many on the forums SH 🙂

My kind thoughts

Paulxx