Depression

[M-ia_123]

So I’ve been going through a depressive episode for a while and today (this morning) I spent an hour crying because I didn’t want to get up and go to school. Then later today it was raining and I got really happy, So I like put on a raincoat and ran outside with my music and I was out there dancing and picking blackberries (which we have in our backyard) and just like being happy for an hour then once I come inside I give the blackberries to my family and ask if we can like picnic on the deck and my dad says yes, so I run and get a mat and like go to make drinks because that’s like how I celebrate something idk but anyway my mum seemed kinda upset and so I asked if she was ok and she nodded then told me I was getting everything wet. So I cleaned up then asked if they wanted me to make a lemonade. My brother gets really excited but my mum goes “no, it’s too sugary” then I say ok and only make mine and my brothers sweet. Then I ask if I can add raspberries and mum scoffs and says no because it’s to much for just a drink then she goes to tell me how messy my room is and how I never clean up or leave my room. So I went to do that but I just felt really sad. And then later when we’re eating dinner mum gets upset again for me not cleaning my room and dad gets upset because “you’re so moody, you were just laughing what happened.” And I don’t know I’m just upset.

[trying_my_best]

Hi @M-ia_123

I am so sorry that your rediscovered joy was squashed by your parents. I wish I could say I totally understood your experience, I have been in your shoes in regard to going through a depressive episode and understand how hard it can be to pull yourself out of it. So I would love to commend you for finding joy again during a dark time, and I know it’s hard but please keep trying to find the joys in life! 

[Psychdiaries2]

Hey there,

Thank you for sharing and being brave in opening up.

I’m so sorry your parents squandered your joy. My heart goes out to you as I know how hard it is to go through depressive episodes and have your parents say something insensitive.

I’m proud of you for finding joy in tough moments, it really is a testament to your strong character. I think that is the most important thing to try and do when you’re feeling depressed. To find something you enjoy, even if it’s small, and to let loose and just have fun. 

Keep going, you got this. Feel free to keep reaching out on here. You’re not alone. Hope things get better for you 🤗

[therising]

M-ia_123

You sound like such a beautiful amazing sensitive person, who is able to feel or sense so much.

Sometimes it can be a single thing that brings us down and sometimes it involves a recipe of ingredients that bring us down, a whole stack of things mixed into one. Same goes for the highs. Five perfect ingredients for the recipe for happiness could be 

1. The feel of the rain
2. The sound of much loved music
3. Connecting with nature (picking blackberries)
4. Sharing with others and
5. A gathering of some people who lead to feeling a sense of joy

The perfect recipe. I believe it pays to keep a 'recipe book' (a log of the kinds of things that bring you a sense of happiness). This way, you're creating a reference book for when you may wish to feel a sense of happiness again. Kind of like 'I'll try out my picking blackberries in the rain recipe and see how that leads me to feel'.

My goodness, mothers and fathers can be such serious people at times. I should know, I'm a mum). When others see fun, a mum/dad may see something they'll have to clean up later. When others see an adventure to be had, a mum/dad may see that opportunity as being something the family can't afford at the time. When others are squealing with pure delight a mum/dad may be hearing even more noise at the end of what's been a very noisy day. Sometimes parents aren't entirely conscious of how much that fun, adventure or delight means to their child. Sometimes they need reminding or sometimes a bit of compromise is what's called for. 

My daughter is 23 and still struggles with cleaning her room. She needs serious strategies. It took me a long time to realise that it's not a simple task for her. She's explained to me why it's not easy and a lot of it makes sense. Part of it's to do with ADHD. Sometimes we parents think something should be easy when it fact it's not, (based on our nature, the way our brain ticks or other factors involved).