Depression

Farda · ‎02-01-2023

With a constant unhappiness inside me, I look at people who are happy, having fun and enjoying their life surrounded by people who love them unconditionally. Whereas I am stuck here in a marriage where there is no love, care, empathy and respect. A marriage that is only based on sexual desire.
I have a lovely daughter, who has been playing a major part in keeping me going in life and pushing me to cope. Its just her today if im in this relationship and alive or tolerating everything.
My husband doesn’t seem to care or understand anything and doesn't even bother to try. For him I am a drama queen, an ungrateful woman, dishonest, a bad wife, a boring wife, the worst person. If he goes out alone and hit the car and get it scratched he will say it was because of ME. Every problem in his life is because of me and every problem in my life is also because of me.
I want to go back to my pre-married life but i dont know how. When i think about leaving so many things come into my mind and I stop.
I am stuck at home. Can't go out. Don't have friends. Dont feel like driving. But want to go out and enjoy like i used to before getting married. But don't have the energy. And thinking about leaving the house alone with a toddler gives me anxiety.
I dont know what to do. I cant anymore. I cant...

Sophie_M · ‎02-01-2023

Dear Farda

Welcome back to the Beyond Blue forums, we are glad you had the bravery to post.

We can hear just how trapped and powerless you are feeling at the moment, it can be hard to think of a future when you cannot see a way out of your current situation. We have included some links below for you to obtain as much information as you possible can around what options you have, this knowledge will be your power in moving forward from here; they are all free to access, just click on the links below:

In addition to speaking with trusted friends and family members, including your GP about how you are feeling, we would love for you to give one of our fully trained counsellors a call for some counselling support. Our counsellors are here 24/7 on 1300 22 4636 or via our WebChat.

As we mentioned, we can hear these thoughts and feelings are somewhat intense lately so please know that our lovely friends at Lifeline (13 11 14) and the Suicide Call Back Service (1300 659 467) are always there for you whenever things are feeling like too much to cope with.

Thank you again for reaching out, we will leave you in the hands of our lovely community members who will be here on your thread soon. Thanks again for sharing. It’s a powerful and brave first step towards feeling better.

Regards

Sophie M