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Cancer still here robbing me of my life

lilly2016
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hello all, I'm back after two years and updating my situation, and my situation is I still have Cancer and it's spread again, I had some wins! But the damage is done, the only thing I can do is pray. Being kind of young and living with cancer changes your world, you never feel the same and the future, well is there one to think about? Worrying about loved ones is the hardest of all, how do they deal with this. My anxiety is through the roof and medication is the only thing that helps, you try to escape at times in your mind, but reality kicks in and you know what your facing, it's like facing a firing squad, you never know when the trigger is going to go off. I've had a great life don't get me wrong, many ups and downs but overall it's been so remarkable.i still get around and go on little holidays etc but when your alone, your left with your own thoughts and believe you me, it's traumatic. I believe in the afterlife, I often seek out information about people that have passed and been brought back to life and what they saw when they died, some of the stories are incredible, that helps. Love,. Praying and caring for others are the most important things in my life right now. I still laugh, have fun, but there is a dark cloud above me constantly and it never leaves me.

2 Replies 2

geoff
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hello lilly, I am really sorry that you have cancer as I too found out last Oct that I have AML and know exactly how you are feeling and our days can be so different.

Fortunately I have many family/friends who keep in touch with me, but there are times when you wish you were just alone to do anything that still some pleasure.

I want to wish you well, unfortunately the site doesn't allow us to communicate separately only on the forums.

Please keep n touch with me.

Geoff.

Life Member.

lilly2016
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Gosh Geoff, I think I've chatted with you here before along time ago, I'm so sorry to hear about your diagnosis. I know it sucks, and thankyou for replying to my post, it means alot to me. Yes Cancer is a struggle, I try to keep busy at times, where other times I just lay in bed, as long as I still have my legs, I will just keep walking, I do not want to know when I'm going to die, I just wanna keep walking and when I'm gone, I'm gone, facing death is a whole different thing, it brings you closer to family, God, and it alters your life and the life of others around you. It's important we all come together to support each other. I have my good days and my bad days, I guess you do too. Love, is the key to happiness, but I'm saying that, it cannot stop a nuclear bomb, but it can settle your soul. If we spent our time giving and helping others, even though we may be on our last legs, then so be it, it's a great way to go down and be remembered. But never go down without that fighting spirit in your heart, don't ever let depression win, it doesn't deserve it. You, me and whoever is suffering deserve a fighting chance of a better life, so grasp on to the little things and hold on tight to your loved ones, create a support group, and pray. That's it in a nutshell. Sending good vibes and love to you and your family around you.