Can't find a job, deflated, was on my A game now I have no motivation

[hasher22]

Hey guys,

Many people out there are doing it tough and I never thought I would land in the position I am now. I just want to say, we all go through very tough times and I hope we all make it out healthy, well, and soldiering on!

I lost my job due to Covid in May. On jobseeker. I went from a nice 65k salary to jobseeker which is now roughly 20k (with the $250 supplement). Not to mention the supplement will go down further in Jan (if accepted!)

My experience is niche, it's graphic design and there are like 150+ applicants to 1 job listing and it's very competitive. Pre-covid, every interview I have won the job, I loved my winning streak. Now, I've landed 3 interviews and I didn't get the job. Each rejection is putting me in a heavy state of depression. Most days I don't even have the will do being my old self back and constantly say to myself "whats the point?"

Over the last 3 months, I've been spiraling down and getting worse.

- I've stopped going to the gym because I can't afford it
- I moved homes to pay cheaper rent
- I stay in bed the majority of the day (roughly 15 hours in bed)
- I rarely eat because I want to save the food for the next day
- I don't want to see my friends because I know I will just bitch about the situation I am in, I am in misery and misery loves company (but I dont want to project misery)
- I had to take off hospital cover from my health insurance
- I don't listen to music anymore, it's weird I know, but I only listen to music when I am happy
- I do most things in the dark because of electricity prices and try eat ready made stuff because of gas prices

My life has flipped

My best friends don't know the situation I am in. Both of them have jobs and both of them earn over 150k per year. I am quite stubborn in the sense that I can get through this myself but at the same time, I feel them just listening to me is not enough. I need to change and the only person that can do that is me.

I have no family to go to except my mother who is quite elderly and every time I speak to her, I need to repeat myself like 5 times, and then she still doesn't get it.

Every day, I look for jobs, I try to eat but all I keep thinking about is the money and how I am going down that hole no one wants to go into.

[Sophie_M]

Hi hasher22,

Welcome to our friendly online community. We're so sorry to hear that the pandemic has impacted you in this way. We understand that looking for work is a time that can be really hard on our confidence. Please know that there is support available to you in this tough period.

If you feel it may be helpful, we’d recommend reaching out to our Coronavirus Mental Wellbeing Support Service. The website will be regularly updated with information, advice and strategies to help you manage your wellbeing and mental health during this time. You can also call our dedicated support line, staffed by mental health professionals, which is available 24/7 at the Beyond Blue Coronavirus Mental Wellbeing Support Service on 1800 512 348.

You might also be interested in our page "Eight tips for looking after your mental health through unemployment" - https://www.beyondblue.org.au/personal-best/pillar/supporting-yourself/eight-tips-for-looking-after-...

We're grateful that you reached out here tonight. Many of our community members are going through similar experiences, or have in the past. Hopefully a few of them will be by over the next few days to welcome you to our community.

[Croix]

Dear hasher22~

Welcome here, I see you have already met Sophie_M and have been given a couple of good links.

I'm not that good at saving money so probably wold not be the person to advise you, however utility companies often offer discounts, benevolent societies provide some meals, maybe the following might have some links

https://moneysmart.gov.au/losing-your-job

It's only partly realistic, but every bit helps. The Salvos, St Vincents, Anglicare and more can all help, even if it is only with advice. They might even have a voluntary job (with meals etc) you could do.

Trying to do things on your own - um.

I'd not think it that good an idea, keeping up a brave face if you see your freinds is all very well, but you have a lonely life, with nothing to think of but your situation and job seeking. This is not good. At least have another you can talk to and hang out with. It makes a huge difference.

Nobody will think less of you.

I also might suggest you divide your day, with a set time -maybe each morning - to job search, do correspondence and so on. Then rule off the day -maybe before lunchtime, and spend the rest of the day doing thing you have liked in the past that don't cost, give yourself things to look forward to. Maybe the library is free and you can get books or cd's, maybe something else.

Just break up your day so it is not all job worry.

What do you think?

Croix

[Jstar49]

Hi hasher,

Your post caught my eye and altho I can't relate in one way as I didn't have a job to start with, I can relate in another, as most of my life I have been on very low income, with a child.

It sounds like your life has changed dramatically- kinda riches to rags, rather than the normal fairy tale. I'm really sorry cos it's obviously very hard to adapt. However there is a lot of positives to living a simple life, which maybe you haven't had a chance to discover.

Beaches and the bush is free, hobbies like birdwatching or star gazing literally eat up the hours. Making meals from scratch, maybe from food you have gathered at a nearby community garden, is a great survival skill and one that many people have lost touch with.

Ready made meals might save on gas, but will cost more than buying some mince and making spaghetti bolognese, which you can eat for a week, or else freeze some for another night. I usually make lasagne with mine too, for the second nite. There's tons of cheap meals. Maybe there's a neighbourhood house nearby that's running 'cooking on a budget' classes- or mite if you asked for it. I'm sure there's others in your situation.

Libraries and op shops are awesome, and filled with interesting, generally friendly people.

You're obviously very good at what you do, and have enjoyed success as well, so it may not be very long before you're back to some kind of normal......please don't let it get you down.

Also, have you thought about donating your skills?

There might be some good you can do for a local organisation or charity/youth group which would lift your spirits and do some real good in this economic downturn. It sounds like you have some pretty cool skills....

I know it's hard when you feel down and haven't got much motivation, but hey. Sun's still shining, we live in the lucky country (never truer!) and things WILL get better.

All the best for your journey,

J*

[Tammy2006]

Hi Hasher

I also can’t seem to get out of bed these days, my body won’t let me.

its really hard I just can’t get motivated

all I want to do is sleep

Tammy

[Jstar49]

Hi Tammy,

It sounds like your days are a struggle, I'm sorry thats happening for you at this time. Have you lost your job also?

Sometimes my motivation is my cup of tea and toast, if I'm honest. When I was a single mum with PND my kid and her needs got me out of bed, but I was sleepwalking thru my days. Not exactly the experience of motherhood that I'd read about!

Depression is so nasty, it's an enemy that you have to fight. I have also read that it's anger turned inwards, so that's maybe food for thought for another day.

It's easier to keep a ball rolling than to start one, so if you can just get started, one foot in front of the other, even if it's just getting up to sit in the sun- sun is so good for our wellbeing. Exercise of course- everyone says that and it's the hardest thing in the world when you're depressed, I know, but if you can somehow motivate yourself to do- walk to a friends house, or to a coffee shop for a daily cuppa-it will start to pay off in endorphins.

Wishing you well in your day,

J*