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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with Depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with Depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the chats on this Forum having been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Paul70 Why bother
  • replies: 3

A number of weeks ago I disappeared into the bush way out of sight to end my life. I was over life. I tried to call my psychologist for help but she wasn't there. I was second away from leaving when she called. She helped me out of the bush and took ... View more

A number of weeks ago I disappeared into the bush way out of sight to end my life. I was over life. I tried to call my psychologist for help but she wasn't there. I was second away from leaving when she called. She helped me out of the bush and took me to hospital. I was admitted into a private hospital for two weeks to get help. The hospital was falling apart, psychologists leaving, not enough nurses etc etc. Whilst in hospital I had an argument with my mother over the view she had of my upbringing, my boss came for a visit and said that they couldn't hold my job for much longer. I was released after two weeks with no help. I have my wife telling me that I have reverted back to my old ways and when I get upset with what she said we end up in an argument. I am now even more sick of this world than when I started. Why the f,.@k do we bother? Where is the help? Why don't people understand? Are we in hell?

Bec_Luke Is there anyone else
  • replies: 2

Hi all. I'm 19yrs of age and this is my first time posting on here. About 6 and a half months ago before I got diganosed with depression, my life and things started to all come together and was working out. But it wasn't until I got really sick it wa... View more

Hi all. I'm 19yrs of age and this is my first time posting on here. About 6 and a half months ago before I got diganosed with depression, my life and things started to all come together and was working out. But it wasn't until I got really sick it was when my life had changed.for a few years up until now and onwards, bi have been seeing a phsycologist and my GP. I was put on medication but it has been a slow process and I know that its still going to take me a while for me to fully recover. I have no one else in my life to support and who really loves me, except for my partner. We had been together 3 months before I had gotten sick, there had been a few ups and downs in our relationship that had been hard and I guess im never gonna hear the end of it. He has been with me all this time, which I dearly cant explain how much I appreciate that. Due to my past childhood experience and this illness, is so hard. I've find it really hard to relate with other people or build new friendships. My partner is a social person who has a really good group of friends that I have never had. I would go a long with him when we go out to his friends gatherings, how ever in find it hard to relate to as they are old schoolmates and friends of his not mine. Every time we go out I kind of feel l the outsider, the lonely one. I've tried having conversations but its hard because, all there is to talk about are just the general things in life. Apart from that theres nothing else to talk about. I know my partner is trying hard to get me out and meet his friends and get to know them, but its really hard to when either of you cant relate, I've been told by my gp that its normal in many relationships like this however, I have been told its weather hus friends are willing to accept the other half of the relationship. But its only a regular thing that these gather8ngs happen. Its playing a big part on the relationship as its hard to want both a social life and a commited life as mt partner has told me. Iv recently cut down on my medication because im changing to another type. Im seeing another dr now as well as my phsycologist and gp, but at times I just feel like things are so hard and no 9ne can hear or under stand me and I just dont know what to do anymore . My life feels like a roller coaster and it just feels like forever to recover from. I find every day hard sometimes and I feel that my relationship is slipping away. At time I just dont feel like my partner knows why or whats going on. Eventhough on occasions its happened before and has be3n explained to. I know it must be really hard for him but I just feel that his caught up in just him self and doesnt notice. I juat have no one else in my life and I just dont know what to do anymore. I feel like ive tried/trying and im finding things so hard right now, I just don't know what to do. If there is anyone who can understand, it just be nice to just to have someone to chat to, someone who I can relate with.

mamamia Exhausted.
  • replies: 1

Hi. My name is Ria and I have had this infliction for what seems a life time. Until recently I thought I had it under control but unfortunately it has me beaten again. Am trying to deal with it without medication because I hate taking it. Have been t... View more

Hi. My name is Ria and I have had this infliction for what seems a life time. Until recently I thought I had it under control but unfortunately it has me beaten again. Am trying to deal with it without medication because I hate taking it. Have been to counsellors and physcologists in the past and found them to be no help. I don't want to talk in depth about what my deep seeded issues are. Right now it is just too much to cope with. I have unfortunately made some bad choices in regards to relationships and this has some what scarred me. I was married for almost 25 years and have 3 children who are now adults. I stayed far too long in that marriage, for my kids sake. My husband was very controlling. He was jealous of anyone who took me away from him. He wanted my attention constantly. He was even jealous of our children. As a result of this I was never given the chance to enjoy our children. He was forever telling me what to do, when to feed them, where to take them etc. I have always resented him for that. I finally found the courage to leave when our youngest was 16. By then I had been suffering with depression for over 10 years and I was also diagonosed with Menieres. A very debilitating illness with no cure. I got very little from the settlement. He didn't want to give me anything. I know some people, esp guys are going to say all women say that but it is true. My husband was very very mean and I must admit I was too tired to fight. Any way I was very happy for about 4 months. I was on medication at this time. In frustration and anger I have hurt myself. I got together with some one I had known for 13 years. He moved in with me and my daughter. He was an abusive alcoholic and a compulsive gambler. He hurt me and stole my money. I left him but I had to leave town. Leave my kids. who I still miss terribly, and leave a very good job. I was a basket case and thought leaving town was the only way to get away from him. I moved in with my sister and her family. I slowly got back on my feet. Moved to a small town, into a little place of my own and found a good job that I enjoyed. Of course I thought I needed a man so met one online. Got to know him over 3 years. We spent a bit of time together. I really thought he was perfect for me. I gave up my job, my place and moved, away from my support which was my family, across to W.A. I have never seen some one change so quickly. I was again in a horrible situation. I left him after giving it a go for 18 months. Now I am not saying that I am a perfect person, but I certainly don't make out I am some one I am not. What you see is what you get. The biggest issue I have is not being able to forgive myself. For hurting my children, by leaving them when they needed me esp my daughter and for hurting myself. I don't mean physically, I mean emotionally. I really just want to be happy in myself again. I am tired of putting on a brave face for those around me. I am tired of working. It is such an effort to do anything. I have no where to relax and be myself. I just want to cry and sleep for as long as I need to. Now at midnight I will try and get some sleep so I can function at work this morning. Thank you for allowing me to vent. Sorry it was very long winded.

jodes76 so over it all
  • replies: 2

very depressed at the moment. been drinking heavily, I don't want to give it up. also having suicidal thoughts. have been self harming. im such a mess, feel like theres no way out of this.

very depressed at the moment. been drinking heavily, I don't want to give it up. also having suicidal thoughts. have been self harming. im such a mess, feel like theres no way out of this.

phil350 What else to try?
  • replies: 3

I have had depression on and off for most of my adult life. I'm better at recognising the signs these days and seek help. In the past a few months on medications will see me through the worst of it and I'll make changes in my life to reduce the stres... View more

I have had depression on and off for most of my adult life. I'm better at recognising the signs these days and seek help. In the past a few months on medications will see me through the worst of it and I'll make changes in my life to reduce the stressors. However this time it's not working. I've been severely depressed for almost 2 years. I've tried a huge range of drugs, none have worked. I've seen a couple of psychologists for a couple of dozen sessions. I'm also seeing a psychiatrist but this hasn't helped. I've have just had 9 sessions of ECT and this hasn't worked. The psychiatrist now wants me to see another psychologist but my life sucks and I hate talking about it. I have spat out my story to so many people already I can't bear to do it again. Suicide is looking like a very good option. I have attempted it in the past and didn't want to head back down that path but I've run out of options and ended up here. Suggestions?

ecm1 I'm not sure what to do....
  • replies: 3

Hi, I am new here and need some help figuring out what to do. I have been feeling very down/sad/worthless since taking an acne medication 4-5 years ago. If feels as if ever since taking the medication I have not been the same person. I was warned tha... View more

Hi, I am new here and need some help figuring out what to do. I have been feeling very down/sad/worthless since taking an acne medication 4-5 years ago. If feels as if ever since taking the medication I have not been the same person. I was warned that it caused depression but I am not sure what I am feeling is depression or not because some months I feel okay and others I feel horrible. When I do feel bad I feel worried, hopeless, worthless, I have no self esteem and no motivation. As well as this I have started feeling a bit nervous like having hot flushes and racing heart. I am too scared to see a doctor because I feel stupid going if what I am feeling is just the "normal" feeling down in the dumps because I know what I am feeling is not as severe as some peoples experiences. I have not talked about this to my friends or family because I am too scared that they wont understand or think i was being pedantic so your advice would be very helpful and much appreciated. Thank you.

dwilli10 Reaching Out...
  • replies: 5

Hi, My name is David. I’m 33 years old. Married. Two kids. I’ve been living with depression for nearly 10 years now. I tried to write why I’m depressed for this forum. I read it and I laughed. Then I thought, what’s wrong with me?! On the surface I s... View more

Hi, My name is David. I’m 33 years old. Married. Two kids. I’ve been living with depression for nearly 10 years now. I tried to write why I’m depressed for this forum. I read it and I laughed. Then I thought, what’s wrong with me?! On the surface I should be happy. My kids are healthy. My wife loves me. So why do I hate them so much? Why do I do this to myself? I can’t stomach own reflection most days. I see my family as burden sucking the life out of me. I’m constantly thinking about all the things I’ve never done in life: a youth squandered, a tonne of regrets, no fulfilment. I have very few friends who I rarely see. I have interests but I don’t have the freedom to pursue them. I feel trapped in my own existence, walled within commitments and responsibilities. People say to me, “the grass is always greener…” or that “things could be worse”. Sometimes I think they’re right. But then it’s back to the drudgery of work and home, work and home. I get nothing out of it – no pleasure whatsoever. I’m reasonably healthy, I don’t take drugs or smoke. I wish I had an alcohol problem sometimes. I wish I had a specific problem to pinpoint all this on. But I don’t. It’s a bit like purgatory – that middle ground where it’s not quite Hell but sure ain’t Heaven. You go for months not being noticed. An insignificant spec whose very existence doesn’t matter. You want things to be better, but you should be grateful that they’re not worse. So if that’s the case then why do I always feel like this? Why do I feel so lonely? Like no one understands me. I’m only here to prop up others. Drowning while everyone around me breaths easy. It’s like the whole world is in on some secret to living life that I’m not privy to. I feel like such a loser. A failure. I could’ve done more but didn’t and can’t. I’m not even sure why I’m posting here. Maybe I just need to vent, or find someone to talk to - the people near to me are sick of hearing me bitch about the same things. Hell, even I'm sick of myself. I'm just so tired of being me.

Lisado Lost the plot last night
  • replies: 4

Last night I lost the plot . Had nothing to eat for 2 days, had too much wine , fight with my hubby for " not understanding" he does but he keeps it to himself and I am mean about it. So I took some pills. More to show him I'm at the depths of dispai... View more

Last night I lost the plot . Had nothing to eat for 2 days, had too much wine , fight with my hubby for " not understanding" he does but he keeps it to himself and I am mean about it. So I took some pills. More to show him I'm at the depths of dispair. It was silly off. I seem to be doing so mAny things which are out of character for me. i was very sick all night and feel dreadful now. Going to book counsellor for first time but I feel scared and I'm a huge failure if wife and mother . lisa

Arian Anyone else out there
  • replies: 1

Hi all This is my first time posting here. About 12 months ago I went to my doctor because I felt like I just wasn't coping with life and the smallest things set me off crying. He asked how long I had felt like that and I said a couple of months but ... View more

Hi all This is my first time posting here. About 12 months ago I went to my doctor because I felt like I just wasn't coping with life and the smallest things set me off crying. He asked how long I had felt like that and I said a couple of months but he suggested it had been much longer than that. A year later I understand that he is right, feelings of hopelessness and sadness are things I have dealt with for many years. Found it hard talking to a psychologist, was never encouraged to talk about feelings when I was young and really struggle to articulate them now as an adult. Been on anti-depressants 12 months and dose just been upped recently so feeling a bit better but find that i just want to scream sometimes because I feel constantly weighed down and havent resolved anything. I have been reading stories and forums on here but I find it hard to relate. I am a single 34 year old female with no dependents and never been in a serious relationship. Most posts by females seem to be young or older and married and with children and a lot of their issues seem to come from those relationships. I also dont think i have had a dramatic life event which has caused these feelings. Is there anyone else out there whose experience is similar? Thanks

hobbitmomma losing my mind?
  • replies: 5

ok here goes I am hoping that by writing this down it will all become either much clearer or just disappear into thin air - don't hold out much hope of either happening. I am off work due to stress caused by the attitude of my manageress, fighting wh... View more

ok here goes I am hoping that by writing this down it will all become either much clearer or just disappear into thin air - don't hold out much hope of either happening. I am off work due to stress caused by the attitude of my manageress, fighting what appears to be an endless battle with workcover, 12000 miles from my family, live in a very remote outback town in south australia, live by myself and am feeling so low it hurts. I cannot see a way out of the mess my life is in right now - and I don't think anyone realises how bad it has become. My days seem endless - not just boring but pointless, I cry for no reason, feel suicidal a lot of the time, only am too scared to do anything about it - that seems really stupid I know but it is how i feel. Most of the time I feel l am going crazy by degrees - I have had panic attacks when out and am now too scared to do that unless I have someone with me - that is not always possible so I tend to stay in a lot. I want my life back - I want to go back to where none of this was happening and where I felt if not in total control , at least in partial control. Sorry if this sounds like the rambling of a mad woman but I think I need help and am afraid to ask for it in case I am told to go away ans stop being silly.