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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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1one ruminations
  • replies: 7

i have been struggling on & off for 15 years with melancholia, having 3 severe clinical depression episodes, one lasting a couple of years...lately i feel that i generally function at 80%, which i suppose is better than not functioning at all, yet i ... View more

i have been struggling on & off for 15 years with melancholia, having 3 severe clinical depression episodes, one lasting a couple of years...lately i feel that i generally function at 80%, which i suppose is better than not functioning at all, yet i can't seem to get past that point. the main reason is i still cannot accept the past & choices i made long ago. in my mind i can accept where i'm at but i just have been not able to quit the 'what if' thoughts, & i really need to be able to do this to overcome my emotional paralysis. help!?

frequentfler44 starting depression episode how do i stop
  • replies: 1

i have just started a depression cycle, recognise first indicaton of depression, my problem is i dont know how to stop it in its tracks, right now. i dont want to go thru the full 10 -14 day ineveitable cycle

i have just started a depression cycle, recognise first indicaton of depression, my problem is i dont know how to stop it in its tracks, right now. i dont want to go thru the full 10 -14 day ineveitable cycle

White_Rose Not Sure Where or what I am
  • replies: 4

I feel really odd these days. I walk through the world yet it seems I am not part of it. Things happen round me but don't impact on me. I am going to stop seeing the psychologist for reasons I cannot talk about. Maybe I am so afraid of this happening... View more

I feel really odd these days. I walk through the world yet it seems I am not part of it. Things happen round me but don't impact on me. I am going to stop seeing the psychologist for reasons I cannot talk about. Maybe I am so afraid of this happening because he has been such a wonderful support to me and really helped me when I was in despair. I feel I can't talk to anyone except my GP who is on holiday ATM. I have been ill and maybe I have not yet recovered but this does not explain why I feel so disconnected from everything. What a load of babble I am writing. Mary

MAR Maybe i just need someone to understand me!
  • replies: 1

Hello everyone,a brief, i have been jobless for over years now, trying but nothing seems to work, i am 37 male, single, live with mother and sisters, and nephews; family tension is always there. and it is frustrating. i am creative, and i am pro-phot... View more

Hello everyone,a brief, i have been jobless for over years now, trying but nothing seems to work, i am 37 male, single, live with mother and sisters, and nephews; family tension is always there. and it is frustrating. i am creative, and i am pro-photographer, this gives you an idea that i pay attention to details.I for as long as i can remember worry a lot,to an extent that it gets to me negatively, even when i was a kid, i remember to have stomach spasm after my school exams.2 years ago, i suffered, from what i found was Depersonilization or Derealization, due to smoking a couple of puffs of weed, some told me, it is not that, and the over all was stress. but it went well after that...as this feelign started fading away. lately,i am being consumed by fear, fear of illness,death, and i start analyzing everything that is happening in my body... i suffered my first anxiety or panic attack last week,and it was scary, did EKG, blood tests, everything was normal,but cant stop thinking of it.. visited a neurologist, who told me that i am in early stages of depression, he gave me dietery supplements,and medication to help me sleep.but still, i have this foggy head,tightness in my chest, i feel like something is holding and strangling my neck,something holding that back of my head,and still worry about everything,and honestly i am becoming creatively pessimistic in all aspects of life.I am a religious person, and suddenly i start asking question that i can not answer,which creates this kind of being in a dark alley feeling, then thinking about my health,then thinking what;s happening to me? am i going to stay this way? i wasn't like this before,...i want o my old me.and it frustrates me when i try to talk to someone and he tells me it is all in your head,and you can change your situation, as if i i happy with i am in now, and i want it.been through a lot lately, i don't know if it depression,or anxiety. will it change when my life style changes... its just that i feel down, and at times, i feel ok (and i will be very happy), and then boom, down the drain i go again.sometimes i feel i wish i am in dream and snap out of my mood.i dont want to be this way, i want my old me back . Maybe i need a few words or maybe i just want to let the steam out.thank you for your time

AGrace Welcome to MENTAL HEALTH WEEK 2014
  • replies: 10

Mental Health Week is a national event, held in October to coincide with World Mental Health Day (10 October). It's an opportunity to promote awareness about mental health and wellbeing, and equip people with the right information. There's a number o... View more

Mental Health Week is a national event, held in October to coincide with World Mental Health Day (10 October). It's an opportunity to promote awareness about mental health and wellbeing, and equip people with the right information. There's a number of things you can do on an individual level to promote, or raise awareness around mental health. POST YOUR MENTAL HEALTH PLEDGE HERE. Talk to someone about your mental health Reach out and talk with someone else about their mental health Take time to support your mental wellbeing Make a donation toward mental health awareness through a charity such as Beyondblue Fundraise for mental health Promote mental wellbeing at work Celebrate Mental Health day on Friday October 10 by getting together with friends/family Send a text, card, email, postcard, or letter to someone you know who is struggling with their mental health Support someone struggling with mental health on the Beyondblue forums Participate in a mentally healthy activity: exercise, brain foods, brain training, relaxation, going technology free

laura86 Finding it hard to cope
  • replies: 8

Hi Everyone, I thought I'd start a new thread as the other one is getting a bit old now. I'm writing again because although I'm not crying in heap quite so much anymore I am still suffering with horrible depression, anxiety and now I've started feeli... View more

Hi Everyone, I thought I'd start a new thread as the other one is getting a bit old now. I'm writing again because although I'm not crying in heap quite so much anymore I am still suffering with horrible depression, anxiety and now I've started feeling really angry. I'm not sure if others can relate to this. Sometimes I feel like my anger is a way of coping because it's easier than feeling debilitated and crying all the time. I think it is also a way of 'dealing' with the emotions of being let down by people. It's easier to be angry and close my heart than feel the horrible pain of being betrayed and abandoned. I'm also not eating much and am drinking and smoking more than I should. My partner is amazing and I feel so sorry for him having to deal with my issues. My mum is going through a lot of her own problems and is really busy so I find it hard to talk to her. I have always found my dad to be a great source of calm but again I haven't been able to talk with him. Every time I go over there's someone else there or something happening. I guess I just feel alone. I'm still going to the support group- some weeks are great, other times not so much but always worth going. I just feel like so many other people are improving and having breakthroughs and I'm still in this darkness. I'm still not 100% comfortable opening up as I'm not the best with talking to strangers but sometimes I manage to offer advice and it's good to just be around people. Still seeing the spiritual healer/hypnotherapist which is going ok- not sure how much it's helping. On the positive side I've started going to the gym most mornings. Even though it's so difficult to drag myself out of bed at 5am I still want to go. I do feel better for doing this but some days are better than others. I have cried a few times either at home or actually at the gym if no one else is there. Pathetic I know but it's getting some emotions out. I've also been trying to say hello to people I see in passing and even made a friend while sitting in the park. A nice lady came and had a good chat with me so that's something I suppose. Anyway I hope that everyone is keeping well. Speak soon, Laura xo

one_day Sick of my life
  • replies: 3

Hi I've never done this before, I feel like my spirit is broken. I worked for a pastor in a church as one of his lay pastors. He was meant to be a mentor not only on the job but for life. Turned out he was a narcissistic, controlling manipulator - wh... View more

Hi I've never done this before, I feel like my spirit is broken. I worked for a pastor in a church as one of his lay pastors. He was meant to be a mentor not only on the job but for life. Turned out he was a narcissistic, controlling manipulator - who did everything he could, passively or aggressively, to break my spirit. He used the other two staff there to do his dirty work aswell. My wife and I had moved back to australia for this job, but was the worst 18 months of our lives, and I'm speaking from experience. I battled cancer not that long ago, with six months chemotherapy. The following year after that was black year. But with a ray of Sunshine, the job offer working for this pastor. I fought my way out of there, he did everything he could to manipulate and control us into being stuck there. He also happened to be high up in the denomination hierarchy which wasn't helpful. Turned out a lot of the hierarchy know what he's like and watched me move there. Ringing for help, I received not much. Now I'm politically not a good person to talk to, soI've lost friends and more. I was ripped off of 8 thousand dollars aswell. I now can't get a job and feel completely as if my confidence and self confidence is completely gone. I almost committed suicide a few weeks after resignation. Have fought through the last few months, have a job in government lined up - but just can't see the point anymore. Disillusioned would be an understatement. I'm angry, depressed, stressed (with little money) and just want to call it quits. I have been to counselling but didn't do much. Just can't believe I'm here and feel like I won't get out. when i was at school, I was voted as the one most to succeed in life. I played in the first XV rugby team, was a captain and played guitar and sang at shows around the place. I don't see why I should bother with life anymorebeyondblue’s clinically-trained moderators often work online (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 224 636.

Tiger_lily Prisoner to sadness
  • replies: 5

I was officially diagnosed about 9 months ago, but have suffered with depression on and off for a much longer period. My 'black dog' presents itself as waves of crippling sadness, emotional outbursts and tears for no apparent reason. These instances ... View more

I was officially diagnosed about 9 months ago, but have suffered with depression on and off for a much longer period. My 'black dog' presents itself as waves of crippling sadness, emotional outbursts and tears for no apparent reason. These instances then make me think negatively about many aspects of my life, pulling me deeper and deeper into the darkness. I often have problems sleeping (nights are the worst for me) and rarely have much of an appetite. I have chosen to be very private about my illness, and have only confided in my partner. I've become very good at hiding my depression. However, my condition now leads me to doubt my relationship with my partner and second guess everything. I hate being so down all the time, I miss feeling joy and happiness in my life and I am scared I am losing the ones I love because sometimes I just can't face the day, and they confuse this with me being disinterested or choosing to be alone. I am finding it increasingly more difficult to be in social situations, as I struggle to find anything positive to say about myself, and I feel very uncomfortable when my friends talk about how happy their lives are. I no longer enjoy my job, and obsess over even the smallest negative situation. I want to escape this dark prison. I am sick of this constant weight bearing down on me. I want to enjoy life again. I do not want to take meds, but would welcome some suggestions for coping methods to get through the dark days.

PugsLoveHugs Undiagnosed for too long?
  • replies: 4

Hi there,Some of my earliest memories at 6 or 7 years of age include my parents yelling exhausted that "I'm only being miserable because I enjoy it" when I couldn't stop crying. I got stuffed toys when I didn't cry for a full 2 weeks after things wer... View more

Hi there,Some of my earliest memories at 6 or 7 years of age include my parents yelling exhausted that "I'm only being miserable because I enjoy it" when I couldn't stop crying. I got stuffed toys when I didn't cry for a full 2 weeks after things were too much. At high school I saw various psychologists in and out of school, only to be told by one "you definitely don't have depression" before they'd even assessed me, as I was in a rare good mood and able to be myself, and the others focussed on the typical teenager things like friendships and parents. I was really mad when a friend of mine got mild depression in year 12 so got to miss out assignments, when I was told I didn't, despite all the times I'd sat in the corner of a room bawling, trying to harm myself, or hid in a dark cupboard to cry. This girl was going through a teenager phase of dying her hair etc and had never even tried to kill herself, and there was me, with my fully formed plan but just the resolution "I'll wait and see what uni is like, just hang on a few months longer" to stop me. Now I'm 20, on and SNRI an SSRI and a mood stabiliser each day but I still have terrible swings of happy (lasting 4hrs up to 3 days) then flat the rest of the time and the occasional 5 day depression fit, complete with bawling my eyes out, inability to function, and again telling myself "You'll graduate in 2 years, that'll be better" (not that I don't like uni, but being unable to do what I want or have any people respect me iskilling me) I was only diagnosed last year, by a proper psychologist (first one i've seen). He reckons it has been unnoticed for so long that it will never go away, we just have to keep on top of it by rotating different doses and seeing what works, yet they all fail within 3 months or less, with usually disastrous consequences. Today I had SLSWA state championships, the greatest day of the year, and won a bronze medal which was damn good for our first season as a team. And yet I broke down several times because people were treating me unfairly, like I wasn't equal to them, that I was worthless. They don't mean too I know, but why do it?!? It has made me so upset that I don't think I can go to the after party which starts in 15 minutes, which I have been looking forward to all year. I just wanted to share in case it makes others feel better

happyface Not sure what to do
  • replies: 4

Hi There, I think I need to seek help but I've tried twice previously and both times ended quite badly. I just sucked it all up, got on with life and kept on sweeping feelings under the carpet, so to speak. I'm in a position where suddenly everything... View more

Hi There, I think I need to seek help but I've tried twice previously and both times ended quite badly. I just sucked it all up, got on with life and kept on sweeping feelings under the carpet, so to speak. I'm in a position where suddenly everything around me has come crashing down. My husband has just had some bad news at work, my small not-for-profit company I started has fallen apart, my career is all but over and my plan to retrain at university next year is pretty much in doubt because of my husband's work issues. Even when in the absolute throws of depression previously, I've always been able to (with much effort) claw my way out, see a light at the end of the tunnel - anything to hold on but this time, I just, there just doesn't seem to be a light. I still force myself out of bed every morning, do my work to try and fix everyone else's problems (because they become my own eventually), do what I need to but the whole day all I want to do is go back to bed, I'm exhausted yet at night time, I do everything I can to stay awake - watch tv, play on my phone, you name it, I'll do it. I guess I don't know what's wrong with me - I don't know how to move forward and I'm nervous of seeking professional help again after the last two experiences. I don't know if this will just pass and I'm being weak or whether I should accept I'm not perfect - heck, I just don't really know anymore. I don't even know what it is I'm looking for here to be honest. Thank you to anyone who does reply.