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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Shiny Ashamed of my depression
  • replies: 8

I don't have severe clinical depression. I am able to get up and work part time in my own business, and cook most nights for three teenage boys. I am a single parent, my ex-husband having passed last year after four years of pain and suffering follow... View more

I don't have severe clinical depression. I am able to get up and work part time in my own business, and cook most nights for three teenage boys. I am a single parent, my ex-husband having passed last year after four years of pain and suffering following a heart attack. He was only 49. For four years the kids and I have been in a traumatic limbo with my ex having brain damage and DVTs and cellulitis and other issues. With his passing late last year so many people have said "Now you are all free to move on" etc. They mean well. And it is true we are now in a place to move on with our lives. After 4 years of carrying my children through this I am now exhausted. I find myself sleeping a lot. I'll get up in the morning and make my youngest breakfast and get him off to school with a healthily lunch etc ... then when he's gone I'll go back to bed until he comes home again. This happens at least twice a week. I feel ashamed.My life is not that bad. My boys are healthy and after a really hard time the two older ones are now in Uni. My business is doing OK. I have to be careful with money and I have learnt to budget! I have good friends and a dysfunctional but somewhat loving family in another state. I have even met a lovely man who has held my hand through this ordeal for some time now.So why do I go to bed. When I know I should go for a walk or do the food shop or wash the floors? I feel like I am just doing what I need to do to get through and I feel ashamed of my sadness ... I don't want to talk about it to people anymore because I feel like I'm just boring those who care about me. After last year hitting my rock bottom I started to see a psychologist and psychiatrist to help me. I went on anti depressants just after my ex husband's heart attack and put on 10 kilos in 6 months...one day I would love to come off them. Some days I feel fine and feel like I am going to be OK. And then there are days when I just feel so sad. Anyway ... thank you for letting me share.

pamela82 new and in need of some friends
  • replies: 3

My name is pamela and I need some help. I suffer with depression and no one around me understands what its like. I am married but my husband is not at all supportive he thinks its all a joke and that my Dr will just say its anything to get money. Whe... View more

My name is pamela and I need some help. I suffer with depression and no one around me understands what its like. I am married but my husband is not at all supportive he thinks its all a joke and that my Dr will just say its anything to get money. When I try yot tell him stuff he just rolls his eyes and go here we go again. I have 2 children and they are the only reason i get up each morning. They are the ones who hold me here on earth without them I don't think I would be here. I need people who knows how it feels tosuffer in silence Thanks pamela beyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636. Normal 0 false false false EN-AU X-NONE X-NONE /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0cm 5.4pt 0cm 5.4pt; mso-para-margin-top:0cm; mso-para-margin-right:0cm; mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt; mso-para-margin-left:0cm; line-height:115%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi; mso-fareast-language:EN-US;}

Xtron the struggle gets worse
  • replies: 1

hiive been suffering from depression for most of my life but didn't realise it until I was diagnosed roughly 3 years ago, since then I have been on medication and saw a counsellor at one point. it's getting to the point where I feel nothing helps and... View more

hiive been suffering from depression for most of my life but didn't realise it until I was diagnosed roughly 3 years ago, since then I have been on medication and saw a counsellor at one point. it's getting to the point where I feel nothing helps and I feel like imuseless, everyday feels like a struggle and ive found ive become very distant from family and friends avoiding any social interaction where I can. theres even days I cannot bring myself to go to work and even got fired from my previous job for that reason, I got a new job but still am finding it hard to get up to go. and the past few weeks I feel I have fallen deeper in the hole of depression, its a struggle to even be happy and it seems I have to keep a fake happiness appearance to not let people know. for the past year on and off I even turned to smoking pot to try and suppress these intense feelings even though I know its only making things worse. im trying to cut drugs out and seek real help, ive let this depression get out of hand and it wasn't until today I realised I really need to seek further help. I went to my gp to get help with a mental help plan but he didn't seem to want to do anything so im now searching for a new gp.is there any advise out there to try and keep it under control? its to a point where I have no control over my own feelings and found myself balling my eyes out today for no apparent reason and couldn't shake that feeling for a few hours until my wife came home from work to comfort me and help seek support. thank you 800x600 beyondblue’s clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636. Normal 0 false false false EN-AU X-NONE X-NONE MicrosoftInternetExplorer4 /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0cm 5.4pt 0cm 5.4pt; mso-para-margin:0cm; mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:10.0pt; font-family:"Times New Roman","serif";}

29fwa help, I'm just not improving.
  • replies: 3

I've suffered from depression and anxiety for a while now, I had really bad postnatal depression after my son. I just haven't seemed to get better. I take tablets and have tried multiple ones and these are the best ones so far. I've been having littl... View more

I've suffered from depression and anxiety for a while now, I had really bad postnatal depression after my son. I just haven't seemed to get better. I take tablets and have tried multiple ones and these are the best ones so far. I've been having little episodes alot lately like always being down, hate myself, my weight, my life. My oh does fifo 8&6 so its a great swing and we have a 2yr old. I'm really angry all the time and just not happy but I really don't know what's wrong with me. I have had several counsillors and speak to get things of my chest as I've lost my son in 2008 and had a crap time from about 14yrs old to 22yrs old as I was on drugs and in bad relationships and abusive ones. I have not touched drugs for at least 4-5 years am not interested in them. I just don't know what's the problem my past does haunt me as I'm an over thinker and a worrier and always have reoccurring worries about one of my exes. I used to be confident and happy but i could cry at a heartbeat. I drink alcohol because it makes me feel good (at the time) I've had a few episodes we're i actually drink too much and lose it, always in front of my loved ones. It's like I blame them I'm not sure at all. In saying that i drink maybe once or twice a week, but when i do i write myself off and wake up feeling sorry and saying sorry for what I've done. I'm going to stop it as its getting beyond a joke as over a fn ago i was so drunk i tried to take my life. I know I'm a good person and i want to be strong for my son and my partner but I'm just so sad. Thanks beyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636. Normal 0 false false false EN-AU X-NONE X-NONE /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0cm 5.4pt 0cm 5.4pt; mso-para-margin-top:0cm; mso-para-margin-right:0cm; mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt; mso-para-margin-left:0cm; line-height:115%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi; mso-fareast-language:EN-US;}

Alistairs Depression- makes it near impossible to be around others.
  • replies: 4

Ok just throwing words out on to paper.. Here goes. I have suffered from social anxiety for many years, since I was at uni when I was 18. Now I am 28 (eeesh). Sometimes I think it is the case of the chicken or the egg in terms of depression leading t... View more

Ok just throwing words out on to paper.. Here goes. I have suffered from social anxiety for many years, since I was at uni when I was 18. Now I am 28 (eeesh). Sometimes I think it is the case of the chicken or the egg in terms of depression leading to social anxiety or the other way around. For example, if I experience depression, it makes it very hard to be around friends or family because I lose interest in connecting. It is really hard to talk, string sentences together, laugh, keep up in conversation. And it is a drain, because cognitively you are not alert (really bad short term memory) and it is hard to muster the fake enthusiasm to have anything to say. I find that to be a real battle, when I am deeply depressed, I lose interest in most things and it is very hard to connect and feel passionate about these things. When it is so hard to talk, it places a big strain on relationships, significantly when meeting new people and when you are so low on energy, the likelihood of people not understanding why you are withdrawn (even trying as hard as possible to put on a happy face) is high, at least for me. I notice that my relationships are really strained when I feel depressed and it makes me embarrassed. I can't connect with my friends and family, let alone strangers. And then you become anxious about socialising because it often doesn't go very well, it's draining or you come across disinterested. This anxiety then makes you feel more depressed because you feel trapped in not being able to connect. I know this sounds quite defeatist, but this is what I am struggling with at the moment. I am experiencing depression because I am finding it hard to connect with people and this also fuels anxiety in knowing that speaking to people is often not going well because I am so clamped down cognitively by depression (not being able to concentrate or muster up excitement). I feel really trapped by this and it is hard to get out of this cycle of loneliness of wanting to connect with others, but knowing that you are not in the state of being able to truly connect because of the fog. This awkwardness leads to a lot of rejection. Which encourages me to stay where it is safe. Especially seeing as though I have pushed many people away and have caused myself to become quite isolated. Just thoughts on the page. Sorry if it is long winded but I got it at least out of my head.

MusicSciencelearn Work-Money-Family-Responsibilities
  • replies: 5

Hi - new to the forum - hope to get a few ideas from the group.I've was diagnosed with chronic depression about 8months ago and suspected of having it since late primary school (22years ago?). Due to severe bullying through-out school, I developed po... View more

Hi - new to the forum - hope to get a few ideas from the group.I've was diagnosed with chronic depression about 8months ago and suspected of having it since late primary school (22years ago?). Due to severe bullying through-out school, I developed poor social skills and was quick to anger; getting into fights regularly (more like me crying and swinging punches). I consequently used video gaming to hide from life's anxieties/fear of people [currently working on reducing gaming - taken a long time to connect with how problematic it is] Maybe took this long to get diagnosed due tochronic low-level depressionbut also having a child recently to really see how sensitive I was to stress (especially baby's crying).Managing better with medication for 3months now - might be due for a dose increase. Been very stressful lately with suicidal thoughts creeping back in - moving house for work (both of us) and low on money. I've been slow to look for short-term work -both out of fear of 'blokey' workplaces and my resume screams Temporary! I'm a new casual educator (looking for full time now) so I haven't had much work over the holiday, except working for my Dad’s trade business. Guess it's been a hard road coping with being a dad (love my daughter but living up to the responsibilities I've never really had before - both sustained work / income / family / relationship + my own time that isn't Gaming...Luckily I don't drink very much (2 drinks a WEEK) or use drugs very often or have ever of that matter (am I in the minority?) – someone accused me of being all straight-edge once J I guess I'd like to hear what others have experienced - I know comparing isn’t that helpful so I'll try not to 'measure up'.Also tips on managing gaming - motivating myself or goal setting as well - any ideas on that would be appreciated. Any advice I'd like to hear - I'm better now to have written it down (given my girlfriend too much stress already) so thanks for reading and hope to hear from someone. Cheersbeyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.

Guest_485 Feelings words aren't my forte
  • replies: 6

My name is Kait. I have a multitude of acronyms that go with my name, CDC, GAD, OCD,PTSD just to name a few. I am lucky, because I have incredibly supportive friends and family behind me, as well as a really good doctor and a fantastic psychologist. ... View more

My name is Kait. I have a multitude of acronyms that go with my name, CDC, GAD, OCD,PTSD just to name a few. I am lucky, because I have incredibly supportive friends and family behind me, as well as a really good doctor and a fantastic psychologist. I have access to all this help, but alas - I am lacking a fundamental skill. I cannot, in the 20 years I have been living this part of my life, talk about feelings. I'm not talking about struggling to establish rapport with someone, I mean that I can't actually recognize most emotions. Thank God for my support network. They understand that "it feels like wanting to throw a chair" means, "I'm angry", and "there's an elephant sitting on my chest", means "I'm anxious". Does anyone else have this problem? Like your mind has shut down completely to emotions, and you can only recognize physiological symptoms?Telling my story is difficult, only because I can never get the "feelings words" right. beyondblue’s clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636. Normal 0 false false false EN-AU X-NONE X-NONE /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0cm 5.4pt 0cm 5.4pt; mso-para-margin-top:0cm; mso-para-margin-right:0cm; mso-para-margin-bottom:10.0pt; mso-para-margin-left:0cm; line-height:115%; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:"Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi; mso-fareast-language:EN-US;}

Candy91 Do i need help?
  • replies: 4

Hello everyone. I am 23, female. I have never gone to a professional to say something is wrong or to ask if something is wrong with me. I talk to a friend and he tells me I need to talk to someone and seek help. But I cant seem to take that step. Par... View more

Hello everyone. I am 23, female. I have never gone to a professional to say something is wrong or to ask if something is wrong with me. I talk to a friend and he tells me I need to talk to someone and seek help. But I cant seem to take that step. Part of me doesn't want to go tell a doctor or someone else. I don't want to ask for help. I don't want something to be wrong. I have time lately where I feel I need help and want to call out for it. But then. I doubt myself the next moment. Do I need any help at all? I feel part of me is just making it all up or i'm making a mountain out of a mole hill. Even more so today when a close friend told me she has a tumor in her neck. I just feel like my issues arnt important. I have anxiety. and a few panic attacks. I get stressed out a lot. I get super frustrated at people and things if they don't go the way I want, with super simple things. I feel a bit up and down. I don't feel like im in a dark depression where I cant get out of bed. but im not happy. but then I can have moments where im suddenly excited like tomorrow is Christmas. where I smile and nearly laugh and im not sure why. My life is on the up. But im not happy, I feel like im getting more anxiety. I cant sleep at night with out the tv on, and get worked up at the smallest sounds. and other issues and feelings. I don't no what to do next. Are my issues nothing? If not, what are the first words you say? How do you ask for help? Is there a easy way? I feel sick to my stomach just thinking about it.

LewisJ Confused about love due to depression
  • replies: 5

Hi All, I will be brief although I could go on for ever as most of you probably know when you ask yourself one question more and more begin to fill your mind. I have had chronic depression for roughly six years however it was only diagnosed the past ... View more

Hi All, I will be brief although I could go on for ever as most of you probably know when you ask yourself one question more and more begin to fill your mind. I have had chronic depression for roughly six years however it was only diagnosed the past 6 months. The diagnosis was a huge relief as it explained why I felt the way I do and overall I am really positive about my future. However the one thing I am very confused about is the effect that my depression has had on my relationship with my now ex girlfriend. Our relationship has been a pretty volatile one and involved long distance. I broke up with her and she made many attempts to win me back but in the end we parted ways on good terms shortly before I finally went to the doctor, found a psychologist and was diagnosed with depression. Now looking back on or time together its clear that a lot of the problem was my behaviour however I am smart enough to see she was also at times less than awesome. But its hard to see whether I really don't want to be with her or if I pushed her away because it seemed all too hard. Now I just see saw between regret and a massive desire to win her back and then doubt because I still don't trust my judgement and I don't want to confuse her or waste her time. I was just wondering if anyone has found themselves in this situation and if they lost that person how they came to terms with it. Or if they went for it and it worked out and how it worked out. Thanks Lew

Lambie Lost and confused
  • replies: 4

What a crap day - a day I sit here and write about at midnight when once again I am wide awake. I am trying to make decisions - whether to live or die. I think the world will be a better place without me but then a small part of me wants to live, wan... View more

What a crap day - a day I sit here and write about at midnight when once again I am wide awake. I am trying to make decisions - whether to live or die. I think the world will be a better place without me but then a small part of me wants to live, wants to keep going but it is such a lonely trail - one that so many do not understand or even try to understand. Me, well now I have a new understanding of what depression feels like, I will never, and I mean NEVER scoff at someone who says they are depressed again. I now have an idea at how dark their hole must feel, at how different each hole must be in darkness, depth and in despair as it can change day to day. I now know what it feels like to be at the end with little if anything to look forward to. Once such a strong person, always in control, successful and respected - that has now all gone. Each morning as I struggle to wake, my body does not respond, hands and feet are puffy and my mind an empty space full of fog. . Your eyes refuse to focus and I find myself having to wear my glasses continuously. I stumble to the bathroom, mouth dry wondering what today will bring and how I will face it with only 2-3 hours sleep. I must say I have (or HAD) a lovely dr. She seemed to understand and I felt like I could be me with her. She guided me and made decisions for me that I could not make. But now I am faced with a new Dr, one I do not know and who will probably send me off to the mental home. If they have not gone on this journey with me then how do they know. My psychologist, lovely too, but when I hear her say 'it is just a job' about my work, I wonder if I am 'just a job' or a number too. I want to tell her I have a plan when she asks but am too afraid and I sit in silence, she will know what I am talking about. I wonder if she noticed I had been self-harming at our last appt. I have been thinking about suicide a lot. I take medication 3 x a day - I take and wait for it to work, they are suppose to stop the panic attacks but as I lie here I feel no effect at all. They changed my dose of medication too - it makes me tired, useless, out of control and now extreme anger. And that is what made my day so bad. beyondblue's clinically-trained moderators often work offline (invisible to you) on issues relating to suicide or self-harm. At the same time, general supportive comments from the community are encouraged. If you have concerns around suicide or self-harm, please phone our support service on 1300 22 4636.