Immediate support
Immediate support

Depression

Depression affects people in Australia every day. Share your own story and learn about other member’s experiences with depression.

Start a discussion

FAQ

Find answers to some of the more frequently asked questions on the Forums.

View the FAQ

Forums guidelines

Our guidelines keep the Forums a safe place for people to share and learn information.

View the guidelines
Categories
Start a discussion

Pinned discussions

BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

All discussions

Start a discussion

Vanda Lost, lonely scared and relationship in crisis
  • replies: 1

I’m so alone and just don't know what to do. After a life of ups and downs that I’ve prided myself on my resilience to get through but over the past years I have had a horrible bullying experience at work that has absolutely broken me. I used to be i... View more

I’m so alone and just don't know what to do. After a life of ups and downs that I’ve prided myself on my resilience to get through but over the past years I have had a horrible bullying experience at work that has absolutely broken me. I used to be intelligent and strong but now I just want to hide from life, I cry every day and feel so alone. I’m trying for another job, but that's not proving a successful search, just another thing to keep knocking me down. I cry in silence, I’m trying to be brave and hide how broken I am from my family, but I don’t know how long I can keep this up. I don’t know how to escape or break this horrible cycle I’m in. The worst thing is the effect this is having on my family. My husband just wants to avoid all conflict/emotions/reality and says everything is ok. He always has struggled with his own feelings and emotion due to his shit childhood. I know he is like this but at the moment he goes for days without talking to me or just leaves me crying my self to sleep and goes to another room. I understand he doesn’t know what to do and how to handle me but I really need him to be there for me now. I’ve tried to tell him but he either doesn’t listen, doesn’t care or just doesn’t get it. I can’t handle him ignoring me anymore. It’s like he just wants to take from me but won't give back. What is the use of being in a relationship when you are not there for each other when you need it the most? I’ve been going to counselling for months. I asked him to see a counsellor to deal with his own feelings - he had one appointment. I can’t make him love me or care. I know he just wants me to “fix” everything and “tell him” what to do. I need him to want me broken or not. I need him to want to listen, try to understand and be there because he wants too. I know I’m hard to live with right now; I’m trying not to be. I just don’t know I can keep putting up with my husband when he is not in this for better or worse. And I don’t know how to deal with everything else, these people from work are in my nightmares every night I don’t want to sleep, I can’t sleep. Every day is such a struggle and I just don’t know how much more I can take and I don’t know how to get out of this. I’m scared I’m lonely I can’t be strong anymore.

Callie_F Do i have depression?
  • replies: 1

I’ve been really curious about both my mental and emotional health lately. I don’t know whether i have depression or anxiety. I have completed the checklist and i’ve gotten high as the result but i’m not sure what to do. This has been going on since ... View more

I’ve been really curious about both my mental and emotional health lately. I don’t know whether i have depression or anxiety. I have completed the checklist and i’ve gotten high as the result but i’m not sure what to do. This has been going on since mid end last year till today. I’ve had complications with relationships, friendships and family. I have tried finding multiple things that would make me happy for the specific issue but i dont think that has been the solution. I’ve also been distancing from both myself and people. I feel sad and depressed majority of the time. I often cry myself to sleep, overthink about both past and present issues. Physically, I’ve been having troubles sleeping, i don’t enjoy the things i usually enjoy/ lack of energy and I’ve stopped taking care of myself which have caused me both internal and external problems. Regarding school, i’ve been losing confience with that too. I’ve been skipping and i don’t know whether i will achieve what i want. I stress about getting things done. My grades have dropped a ton. I don’t know who i can talk to, i’ve been losing self confidence. I have lost a lot of friends meaning i can not talk to anyone from school nor trust anyone to talk to. I want to tell my Mum what i’ve been going through and how we can perhaps solve the issue but i have two thoughts going on in my mind if i tell her. 1 being if i told her it would cause her more stress since she has severe depression. On the other hand, if i told her i keep thinking she wouldn’t be understanding and she might think im exaggerating because she’s always known me as that bright happy person i used to be. I don’t know whether this is depression or not since I’ve never experienced it. However if it is, what can i do?

ziggdtd I hate my bipolar for making me useless
  • replies: 4

I need to vent a little. I have bipolar and lets just say it’s absolutely horribe. I cant hold a job, i rely on centerlink, i rely on my mum and i feel like a stupid adult child. At the age of 19 i should be studying or working but im too useless to ... View more

I need to vent a little. I have bipolar and lets just say it’s absolutely horribe. I cant hold a job, i rely on centerlink, i rely on my mum and i feel like a stupid adult child. At the age of 19 i should be studying or working but im too useless to even do that. My 17 year old brother thrives at life. He has a great paying job, has just bought his first (very nice) car and has great friends and a great girlfriend. I cant even go outside without having a full blow panic attack. Im so useless at living. All i do is sit around all day and do nothing. Not because im lazy but because my brain is so fried from the multiple anti depressants/ anti psychotics/ mood stablisers ive been put on. My memory is horrible, i have very poor social skills, i cant concentrate on anything and heck i cant even drive anymore. Everyone else around me is constantly doing better and making sure i know theyre doing better than me. I shouldnt feel like im trapped in this never ending cycle of stupid crazy mania and crippling depression. All i want is a normal life like everyone else my age but instead im stuck feeling like a dumb child who constantly needs their nappy changed. Why does this illness have to take so much from me? All of my teenage years were spent extremely depressed and anxious and now im coming up to my 20s and i feel like its going to be the same old cycle. Im such a burden on everyone around me and ill probably be the only sibling still stuck at home living with their mum even though im the oldest. I hate being bipolar and as much as i try to accept it, it just takes so much away from my life. I cant do the things i want to do because im dirt poor and i dont ask my mum or brother for money because once again ill just look like that stupid adult child who cant get their life together. Im so tired of being looked down at for being lazy and useless. I dream about having a normal job and a normal life but its likely never going to happen and ill be that one kid who never left town after school and turned into deadbeat scum while everyone else moved and fulfilled their hopes and dreams. I hate what bipolar has done to me.

stressyspaghetti a little sad, a little lonely, and a whole lot confused
  • replies: 7

Hi everyone, My life lately has gone from bad to worse, i as of late have no friends (due to cutting them all out after they spread my personal secrets and mocked me behind my back for years), a mother who "hates" me and cant wait for me to "get out ... View more

Hi everyone, My life lately has gone from bad to worse, i as of late have no friends (due to cutting them all out after they spread my personal secrets and mocked me behind my back for years), a mother who "hates" me and cant wait for me to "get out of her house" (her words not mine), no extended family, flopping grades, no interest in anything, i struggle eating a whole plate of food, and constant exhaustion. My family and i have never had a great relationship, now its just my younger sister, mother, and i. my mother gets angry a lot, and although she doesnt physically abuse me or anything like that, she leaves me feeling really bad about myself and i spend a lot of time crying in my room. I feel really stupid about everything, like logically i know lots of people have it worse but life just feels really bad at the moment and its like my life is going downhill rapidly. I've tried self help guides, doing things that i use to love, tried meditating and running and that kinda stuff. none of it made me feel better. ive even tried the whole "love yourself" method of spending time with me and taking myself on adventures and stuff. It just makes me sad seeing everyone else with their friends and knowing i have nothing like that. When i go to school everyones always making fun of me and pushing me over in corridors and kicking my face into my locker (that was my old best friend). I tried going to the councillor and he told me "everyone has a right to feel safe at school" and i was being paranoid. I dont struggle meeting new people but i feel the worlds against me. Any advice would be great, i feel trapped in a bubble of sadness and i want to get out. Thanks!

Garfield2020 Feel like im living double life and I might be depressed?
  • replies: 5

I've realised an issue. I feel emotionless alot. I do have emotions. When I feel cry over something that doesn't have anything to do with me, I feel relief that I can feel emotions (so empathy). I used to be scared im a psychopath or something but th... View more

I've realised an issue. I feel emotionless alot. I do have emotions. When I feel cry over something that doesn't have anything to do with me, I feel relief that I can feel emotions (so empathy). I used to be scared im a psychopath or something but that was irrational. I think i was 10 or 11 when I realised that it was a good idea to start like faking normal responses to stuff. Some parts of my life don't feel completely real or like they feel like a haze. I just feel like im drifting. The word for it is "indifferent". I also feel like im rotting. I can't get anything done. My brain can't do basic maths, I have to consciously think about what my name is when I have to do x or y. I can't read anymore. My brain sees the words and doesn't like process them. Things dont go in one ear and out the other. They don't even go in. I can't really listen to thinks anymore. Can't focus either. I do feel love and contentness and care about others. They're just stunted. Theyre not there all the time and I feel like I should be loving my family (my family have done nothing wrong) or caring about this but I just can't. But then I really admire my dad and think he's super cool. I experience happiness but its vapid happiness if that makes any sense. I can laugh with my friends and still feel miserable and anxious. I know i'm living a double life but I don't know how to describe it. I am living a double life. I have more to say but the word limit is stopping me so I'm just going to comment it or something idk

nobodeee Jobs you can handle? Bipolar / Anxiety / Depression
  • replies: 3

Hello, I know there is no perfect job for people like us but I am wondering if anyone out there has found a job that works for them, or at least that they can handle better than another. I've been out of work for a year and am feeling stuck. Thanks i... View more

Hello, I know there is no perfect job for people like us but I am wondering if anyone out there has found a job that works for them, or at least that they can handle better than another. I've been out of work for a year and am feeling stuck. Thanks in advance.

ssmithyy My long distance boyfriend is suffering depression
  • replies: 1

Hi, my boyfriend and I have been together about 18 months, however 8 of those have been spent long distance as I came to Australia for 10 months travelling whilst he stayed in England. We have had our ups and downs during this time as long distance i... View more

Hi, my boyfriend and I have been together about 18 months, however 8 of those have been spent long distance as I came to Australia for 10 months travelling whilst he stayed in England. We have had our ups and downs during this time as long distance is obviously very tough but we have pulled through as we know that soon we will be back together again. However, recently he has started to feel incredibly down and not wanting to leave his room or shower or eat as much as he used to. We had a conversation yesterday that he feels the whole world is against him (he is currently taking exams at uni he feels very unprepared for, has had recent surgery on his knee so can't play rugby for 6 months and just generally misses me). He hasn't seeked professional help or spoken to a doctor but we both think it is likely that he is suffering some degree of depression. I have suggested that he talks to someone at uni or his mum perhaps as maybe the physical conversation may help but he said he isn't ready to talk to anyone but me and even admitting his feelings to me is difficult for him. I also suggested writing his thoughts down just to help maybe try and organise them to work out exactly what's going on in his head (he says that he will often just burst into tears with no apparent cause) as a few years ago I experienced a similar thing triggered by exam stress and found that it really helped me. I am struggling with what else to say to him as we are so far apart so I can't give my physical presence as support. It should hopefully be easier in 2 months time when I go home but until then, does anybody have any suggestions on where to go from here?

vex666 Patheticism
  • replies: 5

I'm not sure what to write, but I am sure it will come out when I type. I've been in a dark hole since my mothers demise; this was in 2012. It was very sudden death and in no way (at the time) I could predict it. I was at the stage of my life when I ... View more

I'm not sure what to write, but I am sure it will come out when I type. I've been in a dark hole since my mothers demise; this was in 2012. It was very sudden death and in no way (at the time) I could predict it. I was at the stage of my life when I was finding myself as a teenager of 14~. I have had about six deaths of family and friends and it's gone to the point that I avoid being close to people--this is a conscious thing. This developed hatred, especially when people 'promised' to be there for you, but instead they use you or forget your existence. I avoid all dating and relationships because I fear they would hate me. I am now 22 and finally getting my life back together. I have been jobless since 2015, and luckily I have a family that endures me. For once in my life, I'm handing out resumes. I studied I.T and Networking in 2018 and my goal now is to study a degree in Computer Science. I'm incredibly self-conscious and I'm always thinking of failure and how pathetic I am. My knowledge of anxiety is that it's normal; balance is key, apparently. Anxiety [fight or flight] is normal with the evolution of Humans. To counter this, I set up an experiment and say 'Yes' to most things I would say no to. The problem is, I still feel down, I feel pathetic because I have to do these experiments and that must affect my pride or something. Is this normal? Is there any other way to self-improve? I've been trying but it feels I'm not getting anywhere.

Steve Feeling very trapped in life
  • replies: 9

Hi.. I've been and gone on this site for many years now as I have suffered intermittant depression, anxiety and various other symptoms. I'm lost now. I've burned through a handful of psychiatrists, a larger handful of shrinks, and been on all sorts o... View more

Hi.. I've been and gone on this site for many years now as I have suffered intermittant depression, anxiety and various other symptoms. I'm lost now. I've burned through a handful of psychiatrists, a larger handful of shrinks, and been on all sorts of medication. Have also had a stint in a private psych hospital last year for 'depression'. Um, so I'm male, 35 and have had depression since my late teens. I've been on anti-depressants for years but it seems like my moods stablise for a while..then I go back to where I was. I think the depression is a result of all my other problems, things that I've only started to notice, such as mood swings, anxiety . My current psych diagnosed me with an "undetermined mood disorder", I've been snapping at my partner for months for no reason, I've turned away the last remnants of my friend base and I really dislike social circles. I'm only just coping at work - I am in technical sales consultancy so need to act like an extrovert - and do - but it's all a scam. I'm empty, confused, agitated and lost inside, both professionally and personally. I sit at work and pretend to act busy because I am just sick of trying to create smalltalk with people. Social situations scare me a little and I can't trust anyone and a lot of social interactions and building relationships with people doesnt make sense to me, I have felt like I was meant to be born on a different planet for most of my adult life. I'm intermittantly more depressed and anxious at times than others. I have a really bad image of myself in my mind and cant shake it, I vomit some of what I eat up nearly every day because it feels so good afterward (the feeling of punishing myself) especially when I eat unhealthy stuff. My psychs (normal one and the one at the clinic) both know this and they havent done anything about it, they seem to think it's just a anxiety thing. Did I mention I have like, hardly any interests? I suppose that's a 'feature' of depression. I go to the gym and have been obsessing over property investing at the moment but that's it. I dont have any friends either to share these interests with, so do them myself. Its as if I don't even exist and I'm not sure I like it that way or not. I keep thinking about myself at 60 looking back on my life and seeing what I could have done differently. What little friends I do have that I do talk to are all on Facebook adn are in different cities, and for some reason they're all female (?). I often have low (no) sex drive but occasionally get huge bursts of sex drive for some reason. As I've got no friends or family to talk to about any of this stuff and I don't think my girlfriend/partner understands all of this really, here I am again. I sure as hell dont I just feel like I'm suffering and sick of it. Trapped is how I feel. And resigned. I can't stomach the thought of going back to my psychologist again so soon after dealing with one praticular subject to go around what I feel is like a huge cycle through my life again. I went to my psychiatrist recently and told him everything was great on my current med, and at that moment in time it seemed to be. I feel like a hypocondriac and a total waste of resources going to yet another different psychologist or doctor. Going to more of these people, or the same ones again, just doesn't seem to possibly achieve anything. The power of positive thinking seems like a huge disillusionment right now. I'm angry at the world for abandoning me and leaving me to fend for myself. I've been trying to communicate my feelings for years and it feels like nobody's interested in listening anymore. I thought I had dealt with issues about growing up an overweight, only child in a dysfunctional family with little support network and years of bullying but obviously I'm just coping, I haven't dealt with them, I want to burn down my old school and physically harm people from my early life. I wrote a horrible email to my old high school recently accusing them of not exerting a duty of care and turning a blind eye for when I was at school. I have no idea what the poor person thought when they read. I've completely disconnected emotionally from my last immediate family member, my mother, and I dont know if its because I am blaming her deep down for that stuff or if I am angry for something else. I called her last weekend because it was Easter. It was the first time I had since Xmas. Life with my partner is on ice. I feel like I cant live without her and cant decide whether I truly love her - I thought I did but really I dont think I know really what love is. She wants to have kids with me, I think she's mad but I'm going along with it anyway because secretly I am dying to have kids but I am absolutely terrified of bringing kids into this world and treating them the same way I was treated when I was little. Suicide, you betchya. I fantasised it a lot last year and that's how I ended up at the clinic. Now I'm fantasising about it again. And I feel trapped. I want to abandon everything in my life and run.. but I don't know where...or to what.

robinr Exhausted
  • replies: 3

Hi, This is my first time posting on the BB forum, so forgive me if I get something wrong. I've had this problem for a while, but only recently has it singularly made my life difficult (usually it exists in combination with procrastination, sadness, ... View more

Hi, This is my first time posting on the BB forum, so forgive me if I get something wrong. I've had this problem for a while, but only recently has it singularly made my life difficult (usually it exists in combination with procrastination, sadness, self-isolation or something like that). I currently attend school and have enrolled in mostly difficult classes, which means that not only am I receiving more difficult work, I am also getting dramatically more out-of-school obligations than I've had previously. It's worth mentioning that every person I've asked has had trouble adjusting - the learning curve isn't unique to me, but the continued effects are. I had to complete a fair amount of work over the weekend that had me working from 8am to 6pm with the inclusion of lengthy breaks to make sure I didn't totally burn out before I had everything done, which I nearly did. However, now I feel like I can't do anything at all, and was totally unable to focus during the day. I also feel that in general I am unable to do the same amount of work in a day as someone else (maybe I'd get half done). I don't want to quit any of my classes, and not completing the required work would earn me a detention and potentially being kicked out as well as put me behind, but I don't want to feel like this every Monday. Is this a normal symptom of depression? What can I do to regain my energy? And do you have any other advice on how to manage my workload?