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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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J774 Hi I’m new :)
  • replies: 7

Hi there, my name is Jess and I’m here hopefully to seek advice and understand my mental health a bit better. I struggle with BPD, anxiety and depression and things have been pretty dark for a while and also being medication resistant

Hi there, my name is Jess and I’m here hopefully to seek advice and understand my mental health a bit better. I struggle with BPD, anxiety and depression and things have been pretty dark for a while and also being medication resistant

Michelle34 How manic is manic in bipolar two?
  • replies: 5

I have suffered severe anxiety and depression for a very long time (first panic attack eight years old). I've seen plenty of psychologists ect but nothing seems to help. Sometimes I am normal and even feel up but then I seem to come crashing down aga... View more

I have suffered severe anxiety and depression for a very long time (first panic attack eight years old). I've seen plenty of psychologists ect but nothing seems to help. Sometimes I am normal and even feel up but then I seem to come crashing down again for no reason. I've quit studies and work at times just because my mental health was getting too full on. I also seem to have PMDD and go into fits of rage unexpectedly and I can't control it. Lately I've been thinking it may be bipolar 2? my Mother and Grandfather had bipolar but I don't get extreme mania where I dont sleep. Sometimes I just feel up and excited for no reason and super chatty and everything seems easy and then I don't want to face anyone at all other times. Question is how up do you get if you get with bipolar two?

Leisa68 How do you get past it?
  • replies: 5

Hi there, I am a middle-aged woman. As I have previously written, last week I was diagnosed with Bi-Polar Disorder. I trying to get my head around it and will do what my psychiatrist tells me to do to stay well. One thing really is affecting me is th... View more

Hi there, I am a middle-aged woman. As I have previously written, last week I was diagnosed with Bi-Polar Disorder. I trying to get my head around it and will do what my psychiatrist tells me to do to stay well. One thing really is affecting me is the fact that I was not diagnosed earlier. Would it have made a difference in my life? I have lost so much through my behaviour, and even I could not understand why I was behaving the way I was. I have suffered a very serious depression early last decade that almost took my life. I have lost friends and jobs. I now to get better, but I cannot help but feel like I've lost something important in my life. I am sure that others are going through this as well. How do you accept this? Thank you Leisalou

SamonFish Need help out of a mental hole
  • replies: 2

Hi guys, it would be nice if you could give your 2 cents on this. Thanks in advance. I have been struggling on how to show my emotions in a concise yet orderly manner. Currently I am completing my HSC. As a normal year 12 student, I know that it is n... View more

Hi guys, it would be nice if you could give your 2 cents on this. Thanks in advance. I have been struggling on how to show my emotions in a concise yet orderly manner. Currently I am completing my HSC. As a normal year 12 student, I know that it is natural for you to feel stressed about your final year in school. My mom has been the sole cause of my depression and dark thoughts. She screams and swears at me for being an idiot. I am trying to improve my grades in which I have successfully have in Economics and German to an 88% and 85% respectively compared to my 65% average in year 11. However, she only focuses on the subjects that are still bad (Math Ext 1 and English Adv). She tells me she wants to see results but that isn't possible since I only took 1 assessment due to our pre-trials being canceled by the coronavirus. I thought that she would see an increase in my Economics and German and encourage me but that never happened. She constantly tells me that I am not going to be able to go to university. Other day when I told her I want to go overseas for university and that I would take out the student loan and sort it out, she just laughed at my face. Then she kept on putting me down with her comments and when I told her I was still going to apply she got physical and screamed at me. Other day she told me she'd be dipping and leaving me to fend for myself for the rest of the year and my life. She also blames me for her horrible marriage relationship (btw don't know if this is tmi but my dad cheated on her in the past and found out). Even though she's dipping, I have to move out on the day of the final HSC exam because by then the rent would be done. I wanted to bring this up with my other family members however, there was a rant couple days ago about mental health in which they believe that mental health only effects the weak or the mentally ill or psychopaths. This made me think that I was abnormal. Thus, I felt uncomfortable to share my thoughts to them. I have had dark thoughts comeback to me from the past. I am scared about how I would support myself after my HSC financially. I feel insecure about my future. Btw if you have any knowledge on student loan or youth allowance leave your suggestions. Thanks a lot again.

Slippers My mothers mental health (I am concerned)
  • replies: 2

My mother’s health has been a concern for a little while. Earlier this year she fell in the backyard and was not found for 4 hours. The ambulance was called but she refused to go to hospital for an overnight check-up. I found out last week that she h... View more

My mother’s health has been a concern for a little while. Earlier this year she fell in the backyard and was not found for 4 hours. The ambulance was called but she refused to go to hospital for an overnight check-up. I found out last week that she has bursitis; I think she got this from her fall. (Mum wears a vital call alarm around her neck and she can press the button if she is in trouble and the ambulance will turn up) My sister and I went to my Mums doctor last Wednesday; my family had a number of questions to ask the doctor as Mum does not fully answer questions about her health status when asked. One of the questions was should Mum be driving. I live with Mum and she sometimes borrows my car, in the five years, that I have had the car there has been a 4 or 5 accidents, Mum was driving each time. I am concerned that Mum’s reflexes are not as good as they once were. The doctor said to Mum that she should not have been driving six months ago. Mum has a full licence though she can only drive up to 10 km distance from home. Last Saturday I could tell that Mum was unhappy, she told me that she had a sleepless night and that she felt like jumping off the gap since she was not allowed to drive anymore and that she felt like she was being rail roaded. This took me aback. After a minute to compose my thoughts I said to Mum that she was being unfair and how would she like it if I was to tell her that I wanted to jump off the gap (cliff). I think Mum is using emotional blackmail, and it is unfair on my immediate family and me. Mum is on a department of veteran affair pension so the doctors, specialist can organise a taxi to take her to, and from doctor’s appointments and I can do all her shopping needs for her. It worries me where Mums headspace is, my sister and Mum goes to the doctor this coming Wednesday. I do not know whether I want advice on this or not, I had to share this.

IceWizard9000 I've fallen so far from where I was
  • replies: 4

Two years ago I was doing very well for myself. I'd pulled myself out of nearly lifelong depression. I managed to do this by a combination of factors: - Getting on the right medication. - Successfully quitting alcohol, drugs, and tobacco. - Pulling o... View more

Two years ago I was doing very well for myself. I'd pulled myself out of nearly lifelong depression. I managed to do this by a combination of factors: - Getting on the right medication. - Successfully quitting alcohol, drugs, and tobacco. - Pulling out of bad relationships and cultivating new ones. - Getting plenty of physical exercise. I became so enthusiastic about exercise that I managed to become a hiking group leader. I was in excellent physical and mental condition at the time. I managed to find a wonderful girlfriend who I still live with. I managed to retain full-time employment and get a raise for the first time in my life. However, a number of things happened and now everything is falling apart. A year and a half ago I tore a ligament in my shoulder, which has prevented me from doing any strength training since then. Last year I began to think that maybe I had successfully beaten depression and didn't need medication anymore. I stopped taking it and was off of it for six months. I stopped going on hikes or otherwise socializing much at all. I stopped visiting my family, and any attempts at visiting them since then have been extremely distressing for me. Towards the end of that six months I was diagnosed with irritable bowel syndrome. This was another problem that was difficult for me to cope with. I was due to have a colonoscopy and endoscopy in March to help treat my irritable bowel syndrome, but the pandemic caused all those appointments to be canceled. This was a huge setback. I thought I should start taking my antidepressant again. However, about ten days in, I had a massive panic attack and ended up in the emergency room. We switched to a new antidepressant that I have been on for about six or seven weeks now. Adjusting to it was extremely difficult and I missed collectively about two weeks of work. My employer has been very patient with me. Lately, the next blow came when I injured my knee running a few weeks ago. My body is all banged up now and I can't exercise anymore. I have daily knee pains. I have to be careful with my shoulder when doing my manual labour job. Everything feels broken. I have a broken shoulder, broken knee, broken tummy, broken brain. Yesterday I broke down and cried. I told my girlfriend I don't know if I can work right now. I got zero sleep last night. I didn't go in to work today and I think my employer is losing patience. Exercise was a major key to my previous recovery. Now, I don't know how to recover.

Emilyp____ I feel as though it’s only a matter of time before I lose my job and everyone around me.
  • replies: 9

So, this is something extremely new for me and makes me super uncomfortable (but I hope I actually post it). I have suffered with severe mental health issues since I was about 13 or so and I’m now 22. I thought this would just be a “phase” and that O... View more

So, this is something extremely new for me and makes me super uncomfortable (but I hope I actually post it). I have suffered with severe mental health issues since I was about 13 or so and I’m now 22. I thought this would just be a “phase” and that O would “get over it” like so many told me, but that could not be further from the truth. I have not been able to work a full time job in a few years and I am currently only doing casual work. I’m grateful that I have a job especially during a time like this but I’m struggling to find the motivation to do anything, especially go into work. My family think this is a joke but have no idea what it’s like to wake up everyday and hate the person you are. Hate everything about yourself to the point where you just don’t care anymore. If I get out of bed I usually don’t want to talk to anyone because I already know that no matter what I try to say it will be disregarded and I will be told to “wake up to myself” or “get over it”. I feel like I’m going to lose my job because this week I just have not been able to physically move. It’s been like this all weekend and now it’s Wednesday I really don’t want to do anything except sleep all day. I don’t know what to do! If I try to talk to someone within my family (which is so difficult to do), they just think it’s because of covid etc or it’s just a phase, but I have been like this for most of my life and it really annoys me. I hate it so much. I thought my self harming would stop when I became an adult but sometimes I really can’t help it and that’s the only way I find a moment of relief. Nothing I do brings me happiness. I truly hate this. I can help others when they are in crisis, but I can’t do it for myself! I really hate this. I apologise for being all over the place with that but I just have so much on my mind that I don’t know how to articulate things properly at the moment.

JayneS I can't believe the level of my lonliness
  • replies: 3

It has lead a very private person to spilling her guts online as she has no one left in her life. This is so embarrassing it must be my therapy! I have long term treatment resistant depression and was previously a superwoman caring for 4 others now r... View more

It has lead a very private person to spilling her guts online as she has no one left in her life. This is so embarrassing it must be my therapy! I have long term treatment resistant depression and was previously a superwoman caring for 4 others now reduced to someone who can only get out of bed to pay the bills. At 57 I know I will now remain single as I'm a recluse due to lack of confidence. I don't know what else to say really I wish I could turn my mind off and not feel the painful memories of the past as that's your only company. I wish everyone all the very best, I feel every waking minute of your pain, with love xx

Doofus2505 Depression and Anxiety
  • replies: 5

Hi Everyone, I have been suffering with this since 2012. My boss subjected me to 6 years of systematic bullying ( Abusing me in front of the other employees and general harassment and a lot lot more). This lasted until 2018. In 2016 i was harassed by... View more

Hi Everyone, I have been suffering with this since 2012. My boss subjected me to 6 years of systematic bullying ( Abusing me in front of the other employees and general harassment and a lot lot more). This lasted until 2018. In 2016 i was harassed by the police in a case of mistaken identity which lasted for 3 years. I left my job in 2018 and am in a happier work environment and the Police thing ended this year. I just cannot get my life back on track, I am on Anti-Depressants and they dont seem to work. I get panic attacks and i cant even spend time with my friends as i feel like i am worthless. 2012-2018 destroyed my life and i even had many thoughts on ending my life and more so on how to do it. My wife and kids are the only thing that keep me going. fed up with feeling like this. just dont know what to do

felix mendelssohn why hello hello hello pls help
  • replies: 19

Hi everyone, I'm only just working up the courage to say what I'm dealing with. Having read lots of posts over the last few days from people in much worse situations I can't help but feel like a whinging brat, but at the same time I am very tired of ... View more

Hi everyone, I'm only just working up the courage to say what I'm dealing with. Having read lots of posts over the last few days from people in much worse situations I can't help but feel like a whinging brat, but at the same time I am very tired of keeping everything to myself and things don't seem to be getting better. I'm a 20yo old uni student, living away from home, completing an arts degree in music performance. I come from a stable and supportive family, no traumatic events, decent friendships from an early age that I still maintain. Hell, I don't even have to work during my degree thanks to scholarships and money from my parents. Objectively quite an enviable life. So what's the issue? Pretty much everything + depression. Oh, I also have T1DM which sucks. I'm very homesick and miss my family - but if I stay at home nothing improves, I stagnate. I have lots of acquaintances, very few friends, and at the moment I'd say no close friends. I feel that the more people know me, the less they come to like me. So I'll just keep it brief and say I struggle with forming intimate connections with people, and I blame no one but myself for that. I generally have a pessimistic world view. Not so much that we're all doomed, but rather that we are powerless to dismantle the structures that perpetuate injustices, and that in order to do so would cause even more harm in the short term. Moreover, I see so many smart and politically engaged people with absolutely no interest in understanding the other side of the debate. Everyone is polarised. I see no meaning in life on an existential level. I am not religious and my life philosophy is probably one of hedonism at the moment. Yet at the same time my depression and social ineptitude mean that I cannot even explore that. As for uni, whilst I find playing and listening to music enormously helpful, the highly competitive environment and heavy practical workload is not healthy for me. I feel mediocre at best in comparison to my peers, and despite lots of focused effort to better myself the progress feels negligible. Of late, I have come to drink a LOT of alcohol. Binge drinking several times a week, normally on my own. I don't fully understand why, but I feel it 'dumbs me down' to a point where I can actually relate with other people (and oh yes I know how pretentious that sounds and hate myself for it!). Alcohol, music, and my cat at home, are the only things that I feel bring me genuine pleasure. Out of characters F