Depression

Depression affects people in Australia every day. Share your own story and learn about other member’s experiences with depression.

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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
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Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
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I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
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Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

All discussions

BlueFang Borderline personality disorder question
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Hi, I was wondering if anyone knew if Borderline Personality Disorder was something you can get a pension for from Centrelink? I'm from Melbourne Vic if that helps at all. I struggle a lot with it and my mum wanted me to look into seeing if I can get... View more

Hi, I was wondering if anyone knew if Borderline Personality Disorder was something you can get a pension for from Centrelink? I'm from Melbourne Vic if that helps at all. I struggle a lot with it and my mum wanted me to look into seeing if I can get any sort of financial assistance due to it. I know I should ask my doctor but I have my anxiety about it, like asking might seem like im using my disorder to be what everyone calls "a doll blugger".

bowlofcherries Being in the black, a poem
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It hits you like thunder funereal dread a dark mood’s arrived got stuck in your head It’s hard to describe the state that you’re in you can’t find the source of your power within The pain of defeat has led you to feel useless, unfinished your mind’s ... View more

It hits you like thunder funereal dread a dark mood’s arrived got stuck in your head It’s hard to describe the state that you’re in you can’t find the source of your power within The pain of defeat has led you to feel useless, unfinished your mind’s in a whirl The music has died surroundings seem dead your senses are dull where has your life led? It’s hard to define there’s no turning back you might as well face it and trudge down its track A new day is here you’re feeling much better a good night’s deep sleep has shattered the fetters Throw off the sheets Pour a nice cup of tea A song’s in your head Send the dog out to pee.

There This time of year triggers me
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Hey everyone, Does anyone else find this year triggers them emotionally? I’ve had a few bad things happen consistently in December and I thought I was doing well but I find myself here today feeling.. well pretty down and emotional. I say down which ... View more

Hey everyone, Does anyone else find this year triggers them emotionally? I’ve had a few bad things happen consistently in December and I thought I was doing well but I find myself here today feeling.. well pretty down and emotional. I say down which probably means depressed but I’ve never been one to want to admit I suffer from depression. I go through times in my life where actions make me depressed but today I’m not sure I have a reason other than it being this time of year. Does anyone else get that? Times of the year they feel triggered by past emotions and actions? I used to love Christmas time, like a watch Christmas movies, have carols on all the time, couldn’t wait to see my family, would have the decorations up super early, say merry Christmas to everyone one I’d see type of Christmas love and now I feel like the grinch. Could not care less about Christmas. I do care if I see my family but the rest of it you can have and I hate that I feel this way. My apartment block had a Christmas party last night which I was an organizer of. Came to yesterday and I felt flat and run down, so I didn’t go. I should have gone but I was quite achy and in this day and age I don’t want to chance being the person that went to a party and gave everyone COVID. So I stayed home. In bed on my own. Now I’m also dealing with FOMO fall out. I know my troubles are less compared to others and I know people are struggling with more difficult stuff I just feel I have no one to talk to. If I say anything to my family they’ll get worried, my partner is a very alpha male type person so I don’t feel like he wants to listen to my emotional stuff and I don’t want to talk to any friends about it either. I don’t know what I’m looking for, just to get it off my chest I guess. Thanks x

Tempest1609 I’m Spaced Out all the Time
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Hey, I really appreciate anyone who takes the time to read this, also I’ll be talking about my feeling about drugs and how they play a part in my life but I’m not trying to glamorise drugs because I’m really struggling to manage with and without them... View more

Hey, I really appreciate anyone who takes the time to read this, also I’ll be talking about my feeling about drugs and how they play a part in my life but I’m not trying to glamorise drugs because I’m really struggling to manage with and without them. I’m sorry. Im 21 years old and I’m a manager a maccas, I’m really struggling at the moment with depression, drug use, self harm and anxiety. I’m currently on antidepressants but I’m not sure if there working yet because it’s almost been a month. It’s fairly safe to say that I have been feeling really low for the last 6 months and I recently had a really big breakdown and I’m trying to help myself but it’s really really hard. Drugs are apart of my problem and I know they don’t help these feelings but I can’t stand reality I just want to be numb and care about nothing. It feels better than sex to me to just be numb. I want to stop as it had lead to physical health problems as well as adding to mental stress. But I rely on them almost every day and I just have no other way to manage my feelings. Im really bad at emotionally expressing myself and I feel like a burden talking to my friends and family but I just can’t like I physically can’t talk to them. It’s not a trust thing I just feel like they won’t take me seriously. I also don’t like doctors I just want to get in and get out so I don’t sit there and talk because I’m so anxious to be there and I’m uncomfortable, that doesn’t help when you are trying to get help. I have felt pretty worthless for a while I’ve never been skinny and it’s something that my family has always commented on and it’s always been made into this joke and that I know has played such a big part of who I am today because I never feel good enough. I pick myself apart every day, I just can’t help it. I just wanted a space that i could just say everything I want to. Thank you for reading and I hope your day is a positive one.

Tryingtounderstandmyself I feel trapped in my own head
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I don’t know what to do anymore, I feel like I’ve become my own enemy. I’m on edge or down most of the time and I can’t explain why. And when I think about how I feel it just makes me feel like crap even more as I don’t want to be passing on my negat... View more

I don’t know what to do anymore, I feel like I’ve become my own enemy. I’m on edge or down most of the time and I can’t explain why. And when I think about how I feel it just makes me feel like crap even more as I don’t want to be passing on my negative energy to my partner. He’ll ask me what’s wrong but I don’t have any answers. Then I overthink how I’m ruining my own relationships with the ppl I love most. I doubt myself all the time now as I can’t trust my own judgement of my emotions (if Someone actually upset me or if I’m just in a down mood). I overthink everything and I’m very forgetful. Making everyday decisions is a chore that I struggle with. How can anyone understand me when I don’t understand myself. I feel so alone

Mantec Finding a good professional?
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I have quite ingrained difficulties with many facets of life, which make it almost impossible for me to do more than stagnate without professional help. The main thing I just can't ever seem to make any progress with is getting out of social isolatio... View more

I have quite ingrained difficulties with many facets of life, which make it almost impossible for me to do more than stagnate without professional help. The main thing I just can't ever seem to make any progress with is getting out of social isolation and forming meaningful connections as it has been so long since I think I ever connected with anyone. I have a plethora of problems on top of that, including an inability to study or really commit to long-term goals, relapsing into states of nihilism, lethargy and trouble managing ADHD symptoms, but this has always been the underpinning factor that I can never make progress with and severely exacerbates all of my other symptoms to the point of finding life unbearable. I first sought professional help in late 2017, but the psychiatrist I was seeing was far from helpful. I didn't really like him from the start, and I didn't respect him, and he kept prescribing higher doses of medications that I don't think were ever going to work. Since I began seeing him, my social isolation and anger issues worsened, and being a musician, I completely stopped producing music or practicing my instruments for years while I was on medications earlier this year, I went straight back, despite how much skill I had lost. In hindsight, I can't believe I didn't stop seeing him sooner, and I am thus quite traumatized as I don't want to be stuck in the same situation of not knowing whether they aren't a good fit, or if my unhealthy tendencies don't like the feel of treatment. I know I never want to go onto any medications again, and thus probably want to see a psychologist/ psychotherapist, but finding one is really difficult. I have seen a sleep psychiatrist who has recommended some CBTi specialists, but the insomnia is nothing compared to my social difficulties, and thus I am hesitant to see anyone before I know how to look for psychologists. How do I find a good psychologist? I have seen a couple before, and to be brutally honest, they all just seemed like people who weren't intellectual enough to be a psychiatrist. I don't know if this is just an unlucky draw, but I don't feel particularly reassured that I am going to be able to find a useful professional online, and I don't know where else to find one. It feels the medical industry has become so insanely physicalistic as well, that I am hesitant to even listen to a GP's advise.

Infinite_Faith Compounded depression.
  • replies: 41

Hi, I've been a member of Beyond Blue for several years, although, it's been sometime since I have logged into my account. I have been battling my problems alone. Now I am back because, I'm really feeling a new low. Just when you think things can't g... View more

Hi, I've been a member of Beyond Blue for several years, although, it's been sometime since I have logged into my account. I have been battling my problems alone. Now I am back because, I'm really feeling a new low. Just when you think things can't get any worse and the only way from the bottom is up - bang something else in life punches in you face. This was another of those days. It would be nice to connect with someone on here that understands what it's like to suffer depression, someone that you don't have to explain why it's happening. If we knew why, we would fix ourselves and we wouldn't need such services. My partner often asks "what can I do to help?". There is no answer to that question. Some of use are susceptible to depression through many reasons, there is not just one single answer. I am a musician - and today we are the last on the list to find our new "Covid Normal". Musicians don't get a mention. The arts sector sits on the bottom of essential services, yet so many turn to music for comfort. Why is that? Why are we on the bottom of the pile while then called upon as the first to help and cure wounded spirits and sad and lonely souls? That's just the way it is. Today, my depression was compounded. To take my mind off depression and Covid (And the worlds problems) I purchased a secondhand electronic drum kit. The guy seemed honest. You see there is a shortage of such devices, everything is on "back order" or I would have purchased a new unit. I get it home and at first I was happy, over joyed, excited. "Wow what a get instrument, what a great honest seller. " That soon turned to despair when I discovered a fault in the unit and this great honest person turn out to be another rouge seller, palming off his faulty goods to the unsuspecting. Trusting people is a problem. Honesty is a dying commodity, integrity, to some, it doesn't matter. They just don't care. I asked for my money back, but no, apparently he was un-aware of the fault although the kit was only used a couple of times. So my new broken drum kit, that was to help me, distract me, sits as a reminder never to trust people. No mater how honest you are, mentally projecting your values on others, giving them your values is a mistake. Money is all that seems to matter. What a sad world we live in where money is valued more than ones on integrity. They don't loose any sleep, we do for being foolish and to trusting.

HanARGHH Grief, Loss and Depression all at once, losing too much weight but just have no motivation to eat or do anything
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Just over a week ago i found out the person i had been actively persuing for six and a half months who also happen to be the person i considered my best friend who i felt i could tell anything to and we would stay up all hours of the day and night to... View more

Just over a week ago i found out the person i had been actively persuing for six and a half months who also happen to be the person i considered my best friend who i felt i could tell anything to and we would stay up all hours of the day and night to talk, had an online ldr gf of a year and a half, neither of us (her and me) knew, i immediately confronted him and he told me he confessed to her, not believing him (which ended up being a intuitive thing cause i found out today i was right, he lied) i sent her 100s of screenshots of our conversations and a long message to explain my side, i never would have gone near anyone knowing they have a SO as i have been cheated on and i know how much it hurts, she still hasn’t seen them due to privacy settings on fb though but i told him i sent them too her as she has a right to know as well as told him to sort his life out an get help for doing this to people, i feel so betrayed, sick, upset and lost... i know i deserve better then this but i also am struggling with coming to terms with the loss, we have gone from talking for hours every day to nothing, I haven’t been able to eat, the thought makes me sick..i have been having dark thoughts and my depression has crept in (i have been battling it for 15 years) i just don’t know what to do, im losing too much weight (i am 58kg and) 5’9” mentally i am bothered by it but i just cant bring myself to eat or do anything right now, part of me is just like well if you die you die, ohwell. How do i get out of this? I feel so damn lost and I don’t know what to do, i miss having that person to talk to every day but at the same time i could never trust him again and I wouldn’t even try because i don’t think it’s appropriate while he is with her that we even talk and try to build it back up a friendship at all.. i just want to move on and be able to try to eat but everything is a chore, living even feels like one, i’m just so lost.

Warrierdown25 I thought I was coping and getting better now this
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So I have been dealing with depression self identified for about 4 years now. I have had periods of time when I'm great and periods of time when I have been so down that every single day felt like a marathon just to get out of bed. In the last week o... View more

So I have been dealing with depression self identified for about 4 years now. I have had periods of time when I'm great and periods of time when I have been so down that every single day felt like a marathon just to get out of bed. In the last week or two I have been coping really well. Been really happy and felt like I was back on track. One of the biggest sources of my depression is feeling not good enough or not doing things well enough. A big one as a mum is everything being in order for the kids and their school life. Being late to school is something that makes me feel like a horrible mum. The last few semesters I have been on top of it with only 2 Kate slips needed. This morning the kids were making Christmas cards I was helping them. From 6am to 730. Then I started to remind them it's time to get ready for school over and over and over again. They finished them at 8. I knew then we would be maybe ten minutes late. Then when we are in the car I realised I forgot to order the lunch orders for school. So I decided to go to subwy and pick up lunch for them there. I spent over thirty dollars on footlongs drink and cookies for them. I get in the car and one of my son's who suffers severe anxiety ocd says but I don't have my lunch box. I knew at that point it was over there was no way he would go to school he already had anxiety about doing the Christmas cards and now I have completely ruined their school day. When I'm driving past the school to drop my other son of I see the activity that I had paid for them to do today had already started so I have even more ruined their day. I started wailing in the car and crying uncontrollable. I pulled over and cried and cried and cried. I dropped my other son of who really wanted to go despite all the mess I had made of it. I cried nearly the whole way home when I stoppyand apologies to my children for crying and making them feel sad and scared. I'm now home but I'm staying in the car by myself until I can get myself together. I'm still crying. I don't know what's worse the way I am over reacting or the fact I have ruined their day. Or the fact that I tried so so hard and failed anyway. I feel angry sad and stupid and idk if I can forgive myself for ruining their day. I feel like committing suicide as the only way to punish myself for what I have done. I know that's an overreaction and the depression talking and wont do that to my kids.

The_lost_one Depression please help
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I'm really lost I haven't brushed my hair in like a month and keep plucking out my eyebrow hair Can't seem to keep a job as I have manic attacks and break down all the time. Someone please help me

I'm really lost I haven't brushed my hair in like a month and keep plucking out my eyebrow hair Can't seem to keep a job as I have manic attacks and break down all the time. Someone please help me