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BeyondBlue Hello! Read this if you're not sure how to get started
  • replies: 0

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for ... View more

Welcome This section of the Beyond Blue Forums is for talking about our experiences with depression. There are lots of chats about how it makes us feel, what it’s like to live with depression and what has worked to help in these times. Thank you for coming this far, we know it can be really hard to take these steps if depression is in your life - we see you and think this is a great step. To get the most out of this space we have a few tips: Get involved. The Forums work best for you when you get active and post where you can. Now, we know that can be really hard, especially when you are experiencing depression. So, if you can post something supportive to someone else here, that would be an incredible start. Speak from the heart. This community wants to know how YOU feel and what has worked for YOU. We trust that you have something unique to say and we can’t wait to hear it. Check in. Lots of the discussions in this section of the Forums have been going for years and they are some of the richest conversations we have. Keep checking in to get new ideas and offer your support. We know it can be tough to start, but when you are ready we want to hear your thoughts. If you need some time to get to know the community, that's okay! Have a look around and see where you want to get involved. Thank you for being here! Beyond Blue

Jeriava How do I talk to my doctor?
  • replies: 9

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really ... View more

I’ve been struggling with my life for the past 7-8 years but I finally made an appointment with a doctor. I feel really scared though because I don’t ever go to the doctor for anything, and I havent seen this doctor for so many years that I’m really scared that they’ll judge me or won’t believe anything I say. I’m really anti social so I feel like I won’t be able to say what I wanna say or I’ll say the wrong thing causing them to just dismiss me and move me along without helping. I’m just tired of feeling alone, depressed and just worthless but I’m really scared to talk to them.

AGrace SELF HELP TIPS FOR MANAGING DEPRESSION
  • replies: 132

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the ... View more

Hi Everyone, Here are some ideas you might like to try for managing symptoms of depression. Of course everyone's different, so let us know what works for you, and please feel free to add to the list... Mindfulness – through breathing or engaging the 5 senses Distress Tolerance – Accepting Emotions and Self Soothing Distraction – Put the thoughts/feelings aside and come back to them when you are ready to deal with them Positive Affirmations – Have some affirmations written down repeat them to yourself daily Sleep/Exercise/Diet – All 3 aspects of our lifestyle can impact the way we think/feel Increasing Pleasurable Activities – Engage in at least one pleasurable activity per day

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Ijustneedhelp Is this depression or something else?
  • replies: 3

I cannot find the motivation to do anything other than gaming....and even that is becoming dull and a chore. I just don't care. About anything. Dont care about hiuse chores, my job which I really hate it's so incredibly mind numbing and I feel like I... View more

I cannot find the motivation to do anything other than gaming....and even that is becoming dull and a chore. I just don't care. About anything. Dont care about hiuse chores, my job which I really hate it's so incredibly mind numbing and I feel like I waste my time there. I feel so much anger too. Towards my life, past present and future I just feel anger when thinking about them. I don't know what this is but I posted it in depression just in case it is that? I'm unsure.

Guest_1573 So Upset About Foster Dog
  • replies: 9

I fostered a dog three weeks ago. I was told she was a bit boisterous but other than that she was great on lead etc. I was promised training, food, crate, halter etc...none of which was forthcoming. She finally was desexed and vaccinated one week ago... View more

I fostered a dog three weeks ago. I was told she was a bit boisterous but other than that she was great on lead etc. I was promised training, food, crate, halter etc...none of which was forthcoming. She finally was desexed and vaccinated one week ago. She popped her stitches Wednesday and had to go back to vet to be restitched. Again I rang the organisation and stated how upset I was about what had happened and how I needed help with her. Again they promised to bring some stuff around to calm her down. Never happened. Since then I have been injured (all by accident) due to her behaviours. She has peed on my son's bed and in the car. She has destroyed books and remote controls. I have tried to take her for walks and she hurt my shoulder. I am so distressed. I never would have taken her if they had been honest with me. Now she loves us and she has to go on Tuesday as I simply cannot stand it anymore. I rang lifeline to discuss as I feel like such a horrible person.

BabySteps MISS DIAGNOSED / MISS DIAGNOSIS
  • replies: 7

I had Compulsive Behaviour Fixated Thoughts Aniexty Mild Depression And than I was Miss Diagnosed Twice with Psychosis which became a Diagnosis of Schizophrenia Because I made 3 ON GOING Mistakes over 3 Years of a 5 Year Period of a Interpersonal Men... View more

I had Compulsive Behaviour Fixated Thoughts Aniexty Mild Depression And than I was Miss Diagnosed Twice with Psychosis which became a Diagnosis of Schizophrenia Because I made 3 ON GOING Mistakes over 3 Years of a 5 Year Period of a Interpersonal Mental Health Down Spiral I had a Bad Time at High School (and a Poor Father, than became Heart Broken and Irritable) (Plus being Un satisfied with my Life) I have been placed on Anti Psyhcotic Meds for 7 Years + For a Mental Disorders I don't suffer from I have contracted Pre Diabetes Type-2 and the Meds also made me Obese for a brief Period of my life, before that the Past Toxic Friends that I used to have blamed my eating habits for my Diabeties, When the Meds Induced It, as well as having my Father's Side of the Family with a Diabeties History I Intensely dislike my Dad most of the the time Plus having No Direction for Occupations OR Ideal Work Industries, Previous Payed Employment History, I don't even have my Driver's License and a comfortable Vehicle or even a Support Net Work of Friends, Never had Intimacy or a Girlfriend either and I am now 25 Years Old

Clues_Of_Blue Screaming into the void
  • replies: 16

Ever feel like the one post in a hundred with no response is always yours? Like the voice in a group chat that everyone talks around is always yours? Like so much of what you say is just screaming into the void, along with thousands of other voices a... View more

Ever feel like the one post in a hundred with no response is always yours? Like the voice in a group chat that everyone talks around is always yours? Like so much of what you say is just screaming into the void, along with thousands of other voices all needing to be heard, but going unrecognised, unremarked, relegated to the unimportant. It doesn't always happen, but so, so often. I feel incredibly isolated, and covid sure isn't helping. Those things above, and the way "friends" disappear without a word for months and say they thought I was fine and didn't need them, even when my last words to them were literally "I'm not okay". I really don't know how much more specific I can be. Mostly I'm used to it, even like being on my own for the most part, I'm an introvert after all. But inevitably that unfortunate human need for companionship, for friends, comes to the fore and mocks me. There are schemes involved here, a start in life bereft of parental affection or social support, all that soppy stuff shrinks like to ask about. In these moments I write things like this post, to get it out, but with no belief it will be anything more than another unheeded scream into that damnable void. My depression rubs its hands together in glee. I guess this is a space of solidarity for those feeling the same. Or a void of nothingness for my words to fall into. One of those. So help me, it all makes me so tired.

ImAllTalone Grieving about a relationship that could've been
  • replies: 6

I want to write here since writing is the only way I cope with hard times I'm in high school, 16, about average. There was a girl I really liked, she always brought me out of my comfort zone in a way that made me happy and I keep clinging onto her un... View more

I want to write here since writing is the only way I cope with hard times I'm in high school, 16, about average. There was a girl I really liked, she always brought me out of my comfort zone in a way that made me happy and I keep clinging onto her uniqueness. I then found out she was already dating someone and that person was one of my good friends I don't know how to feel, I want to cry but all I feel is emptiness. Sometimes anger helps me get over it but it's so hard to get angry like this, And it all had to start during exam season for HS so I've already got alot on my plate I don't know if I should tell a doctor about my current state, I've started eating less and pretty much only eating 8 hours after I wake up, even then I don't feel hungry. I share a class with them and force myself to look away every time they're near each other, I want to stay as friends and celebrate said friendship but I can't stand watching them together so I've pretty much isolated myself from that friend group And she was the only girl where I felt the urge to tell her my feelings, I usually just keep things quiet due to anxiety but I felt strongly enough to plan to do so after exams, only to have it ripped away. I want to get help but I don't know what to tell my doctor, I don't wanna tell him this story I hate this feeling, all it does it feed into my self hatred of being weaker than everyone else, including my height. I'm an introvert by heart but I end up valuing love so much that it breaks me. This wasn't even a rejection and I don't think they even saw me the same way, they were just being nice, And I was just overthinking stuff and was left feeling hurt in the process I desperately can't get her out of my head, all day it's just this and I've lost motivation to do anything, I'm just tired If you're still reading this, thank you, I don't know how long this'll take for me to get over but I'm glad you're here

Blue1556 Have ruined lives
  • replies: 27

Hi, I’m new here. I have struggled with depression a few times in the past 10 years but nothing like what I’m currently going through. I’m a 33 yr old female, married with a 6 month old baby. I have wanted a baby for years and when I found out we wer... View more

Hi, I’m new here. I have struggled with depression a few times in the past 10 years but nothing like what I’m currently going through. I’m a 33 yr old female, married with a 6 month old baby. I have wanted a baby for years and when I found out we were pregnant I was so happy. I really wanted to be an awesome mum and wife and I have failed dismally already to the point that I feel I have ruined all 3 of our lives. It all started when we came home from hospital with our baby. Everything had gone well so far. I struggled with breastfeeding but had some help in hospital and wanted to keep going. A week later, I thought I was being proactive getting help, but turns out it was too late. My baby had been getting virtually no milk and has likely suffered brain damage due to this. We have an appointment with the paediatric neurologist soon, but I am struggling to imagine how I can possibly look at my child each day, knowing I’m responsible for her suffering. I don’t know what to do because nothing can fix this. There’s no cure. I feel ashamed, complete guilt, and that I can never forgive myself. I wanted to give her away, to find someone better to look after her, but everyone is saying that’s silly. And I know it is- it’s incomprehensible to me that I would ever want that, but so is the fact that we are in the situation that we are now due to my failures. I have tried to get help, seen my GP, psychologist, called Panda, taking medications, voluntarily doing a parenting course. But I still feel completely distressed. And since everyone tells me I can’t give her away I just feel like running away and disappearing. Like I could hide, get a job and send money back for her care. I can’t see a way to beat this depression. If I leave, I would be depressed and lonely. If I stay I will be depressed seeing the suffering I caused on a daily basis. Either way, 3 lives ruined and other people hurt by whatever I do.

scaredanddepressed Losing the fight
  • replies: 2

A few years ago I had a accident at work, where someone got injured because of my mistake, and it literally gutted me that I had done it, and once workplace health and safety became involved I was getting charged for it, everyday I would wake up with... View more

A few years ago I had a accident at work, where someone got injured because of my mistake, and it literally gutted me that I had done it, and once workplace health and safety became involved I was getting charged for it, everyday I would wake up with it slowly killing me inside, knowing I had injured someone and also knowing my entire life would be turned upside down. With a impending court case next week, I have found I have spiraled more and more into depression, over the last 6 months struggling to find a way to do anything, sometimes just finding myself sitting in a corner or down by the river crying, and even though people keep saying they are there for me, I have never felt so alone in my entire life. You feel as though you are in a hole so deep that there is no real way out, trying to think of positive quotes, or people telling you to just not let it worry you, and you start to feel as no one is really listening anymore, that will to fight fades away.

Grogu22 Feeling trapped…and feel guilty for feeling that way
  • replies: 2

I’ve been married for 25 years, and while it’s not always plain sailing, generally still happy with my partner. They unfortunately can’t really relate to how I’m feeling or know the ‘right things’ to say so I feel a bit alone in that way. I have sibl... View more

I’ve been married for 25 years, and while it’s not always plain sailing, generally still happy with my partner. They unfortunately can’t really relate to how I’m feeling or know the ‘right things’ to say so I feel a bit alone in that way. I have siblings but we’re not close. So can’t talk to them either really. I don’t have a lot of friends - always preferred just one or two I guess. I have a well paid job and have progressed to management level over the past 10 yrs with the same company. The more I think about it the more I think it’s my job and the company culture that is contributing the most to my thoughts and feelings. Those are generally feelings of being rudderless, lacking in options or direction to move forward, being under valued, even misunderstood? I’m really tired of having to pretend and play along with the politics. The work is souless. Because of a lack of formal qualifications - having worked my way up on the job so to speak - I don’t feel confident in my ability to move on to something else, or even what that would be. And one major obstacle is that I feel guilty for feeling all these things…. firstly, I am the main bread winner so my income is key and me thinking of jeopardising that for my own benefit by changing jobs - especially as I’d probably prefer a job with less responsibility and stress (so less money) - makes me feel selfish. Secondly, I’m well aware there are probably many people who would like my job and the money that goes with it, so yeah.. major guilt again. i hate letting anyone down. I’ve probably been mainly focused on helping develop my team over the last couple years and doing whats best for them and what my manager wants from me. As a result I’ve been treading water for some time now with no one I can really talk to about it. I am having more days where I’m finding it harder to maintain and have had some darker thoughts that scare me. I haven’t seen a professional or even talked to my Dr about this, probably because the idea if it makes me feel like a failure. My upbringing responsible for some of that I guess… not sure if anyone out there can relate or has been through something similar, but any thoughts/suggestions welcome.

Guest015 I have no one and nothing, help and advice?
  • replies: 16

Let me start off with saying I'm a 20 year old trans-girl. I feel like.. a failure, not just at something specific, but at life and in general. I always blame things on bad luck, I do honestly think I just have bad luck, but I could turn things aroun... View more

Let me start off with saying I'm a 20 year old trans-girl. I feel like.. a failure, not just at something specific, but at life and in general. I always blame things on bad luck, I do honestly think I just have bad luck, but I could turn things around.. but I can't. My social skills and my ability to cope in certain situations is extremely poor. I don't have the money to help myself, or even get anywhere and find someone to help me.. I get money from Centrelink as I don't have a job and I am studying full time, but they have a horrendous system that won't even automatically update my details.. There are other details which essentially screw me over and I can't afford anything in life. I can't go back with my parents, I can't be accommodated there for very long, my mum is too far away from anything too. I have no one else to look for too, I've tried. I've lost my friends, well my only two irl friends because they weren't giving me the respect I deserve, keeping them wouldn't help. Tbh I never told them anything I just stopped talking to them but they haven't even asked if I am okay or if I wanted to play something, or even a simple question about something they wanted to know (I do plan on talking to them when I feel more comfortable). With everything that I have going on I just don't feel like it's worth it, if it gets to a point where I can't even enjoy the things I enjoy, and that isn't much. Then what's the point..? You might be thinking, well others have it worse, or that I only think it's bad because it's all in my head. If you decide that, then I don't want to hear your opinion because you're wrong, things are different for different people. Things are bad for me and nothing is going my way, even if I do try to change things, believe me, I've looked at jobs but nothing suits my capabilities and qualifications. I'm immediately outed as socially inept. I also think I have agoraphobia, and or bad social anxiety because I can barely even think when there are people and too many people overwhelms me a ton, just walking into any place alone stresses me out (I'm not diagnosed with anything though). It annoys me a ton when people say "well it's just something you have to get over" or "it's something everyone deals with", "you just have to face your fears", like it's something I can easily conquer and control, it's like saying to someone who can't walk to just practice walking and they'll get it, it's essentially built into me at this point, I can get by with someone with me, or alone with extreme discomfort, panic attacks and paranoia.. I usually have to have an exact plan of my route and and what I'm doing, listing off all possibilities of what could happen, so I know what to do in that situation, and how I can avoid it or escape it if I need to. The amount of things I have on my mind at once, the stress.. I'm losing track of what I'm think and my brain is scattering my thoughts, I'm need to repeatedly remind myself of things I have to do or things that are coming up so I don't forget, forgetting is gonna end up with me not really eating at all. I wish I could forget it all and just relax my brain but I just can't do that.. I just don't know what I should do anymore. Obviously, I feel extremely depressed and stressed, but it isn't entirely the reason I think I should just give up, it's just the amount of things I need to do, and that I'll never truly be happy, I'm scared to even be myself in public, I'm terrified to even tell people my pronouns, mind you, online is easier to get away with but once they find out, respect is gone... I don't provide anything to the world and I don't feel happy at all, I don't really have anyone, I know for a fact people won't care or even notice for quite a while if I was gone. I used to believe it, but that was in the past. I guess my point here is that, I have no one and nothing, I don't feel happy and that I'm worthy of a life. Any advice or legitimate help would be truly appreciated, I'm open to questions too so feel free. (PS. Sorry for the essay, low-key could write more but no one gonna read a book of this)

Exotic I don’t know what to do
  • replies: 2

Hi, It’s my first time posting here, I guess I just needed somewhere to let out all the sadness I’ve been feeling lately. I was with my girlfriend for 2 years before we ended things in December as she says she was unhappy. Fast forward 3 months and s... View more

Hi, It’s my first time posting here, I guess I just needed somewhere to let out all the sadness I’ve been feeling lately. I was with my girlfriend for 2 years before we ended things in December as she says she was unhappy. Fast forward 3 months and she reaches out saying she wants to give things another go. For 2 weeks we’ve been hanging out and going on what I would call dates, at times I’ve noticed her messaging other guys and being on dating apps but I didn’t think much of it as I guess we weren’t officially dating again. 4 days ago however I asked her to be my girlfriend again to which she replied “I want to be wowed with flowers and dinner when you ask me” so anyways 2 days later I took her out to dinner and bought her a promise ring which she accepted and she told me she wanted to be in a relationship again. A day passes and she says she had a confession to make. She says in those 2 days prior that she had had intercourse with 3 different men. She says it’s not a big deal because we weren’t actually together again even though we would’ve been had she accepted it straight away. It’s just brought up a heap of trauma from when I was a kid seeing my parents divorce and how my father cheated on my mother. How distraught it made her anyways i have been so sad lately, crying nonstop and I don’t know what I can do. I haven’t been able to concentrate on my uni work or do anything fun except lay in bed all day. I’m so paranoid that she is lying about not talking to any of them anymore. I’m really scared I’m gonna go down the path of having suicidal thoughts again to which I haven’t had since 2017. I thought I wanted her back but it feels so much like she cheated on me even though she keeps telling me I’m being paranoid and that we weren’t together so it shouldn’t matter that much. I just want to stop being so sad, am I overreacting?