Apathetic

[WithoutApaddle]

Hi all.

Thank you for the opportunity to share my tale of woe and dispair.

This thing is going to be whinier then a three year old banned from paw patrol so buckle up. I apologize in advance for spelling and grammar issues. The public education system has failed me.

Chapter one:

The man behind the tears.

I'm a 30 y/o male carpenter, no kids. I currently have a partner of 3 years and live with her family.

I've struggled with depression for most of my life. I haven't been to a therapist, I find speaking candidly with people face to face difficult.

lately i am feeling extremely apathetic. I work 50 - 60 hour weeks and am exhausted most of the time.

I rent with my inlaws and have no substance abuse issues (besides coffee). Still i am struggling financially. My partner has a chronic illness and is unable to work.

Living with my inlaws the last 3 years has been a real struggle. However we are unable to move out due to our poor financial situation.

i find myself increasingly at my limit and have full scale meltdowns over mild inconveniences.

This has been a particularly bad week as i have had some tools stolen.

Partners grandmother passed

And partners phone has bricked itself.

For those playing at home, Data recovery is around $250 / $500.

Seeing my friends marrying, starting families and buying houses is very difficult for me. Im just treading water while they move to the next stages of their lives.

My partner is my rock but my constant indifference and lack of intamacy towards her is taking its toll.

I don't see things improving any time soon. I hope you guys are doing better then me at this life business.

[blondguy]

Hi WithoutApaddle

Welcome and for having the courage to post too!

I understand you about speaking to a counsellor/therapist face to face....It is hard work for sure!

You have been through some serious pain and anguish...I would be just as exhausted...You have had so much happen within such a short period...Having your tools stolen is similar to you losing your livelihood...not good

Having full scale 'meltdowns' when having minor inconveniences is very understandable especially when you posted about feeling apathetic...This can be very draining and leave us with little or no energy. Can I ask if you have someone that you can lean on (a support person) in this difficult period?

The forums are a friendly and non judgemental place for you...any questions are always welcome....your privacy and well being are paramount here. Please dont underestimate the value of your GP at this time....even a double appointment will help...You have everything to gain and nothing to lose by doing so

we are here and listening

Paul

[WithoutApaddle]

Thanks Paul.

I appreciate you taking the time to respond to myself and others here.

My partner is my support person. Tho admittedly I do find it difficult to burder her further with my own difficulties.

I have avoided discussion my lingering depression with a gp. As i fear they will recommend anti depressants. I'm personally not a big fan of this approach to wellness.

How are things with you?

[blondguy]

Hi WithoutApaddle and thankyou for your kind post too 🙂

my friend is my support person as well...She has rheumatoid arthritis and I also dont want to burden her with my anxiety and depression....I feel the same..even though everyone's symptoms do vary of course..

Just for my own symptoms...I was stubborn and refused the help from my GP's back in 1983..when I was 23 as I thought I could self heal...I wasted 15 years of my life trying to do so and am still disappointed in myself even though the low dose meds have saved my job...my personal life and my general well being

In a nutshell.....

If our depression/anxiety has a continual detrimental affect on our ability to function on a daily basis...then we need to do take some type of action.

GP's can still be a huge help to our wellness just by having a vent...Their focus is our well being

To answer your question...I am doing okay..and thankyou for asking.. You are proactive with your health and good on you WAP! Any questions are always welcome

Paul