Hello Jo
I also am glad you spoke to your GP. Do you remember the old song "It's illegal, it's immoral, or it makes you fat". I would add or it makes you depressed. Not fair is it? It seems there is something wrong with most of the enjoyable options in life. Ah well, we struggle on.
You know I am so pleased that you are working through your difficulties. OK there are some wrong choices. I wish I could say I have never made any but I have, big time. Refusing ADs for ages was a biggy. Trying to manage on my own was another. But we learn and when things wrong we do as Wellington said, "Tie a knot and move on." Great advice I found. Read it too many years ago to reveal.
I have found that it's not the big things in life that trip me up, such as alcohol, as I have always known this did not make for a good time. It's the small things, or rather the smaller things. Forgetting or ignoring that someone loves me. thinking too much about myself instead of getting on with life, even though this can be difficult. The biggest of all is procrastination. I'll do it later, tomorrow, when I've done this, when I've had a sleep, and the list goes on. Causes me more anxiety than everything because it is hanging over me like a black cloud until I get off my backside and do it.
We all have our personal downfalls. I wonder how big a list they would make if they were all collected together. Not sure I really want to know.
Jo, you are sounding so much better every time you write. I know we all step backwards at times but on the whole there are at least two steps forward for one back, and on average more than two forward. Being so close to the action makes it hard to see the progress and we need to rely on others to point it out. So well done Jo. Go get 'em girl.
Mary
