A hopeful story. Depression and anxiety

[Niks85]

Hi there

Just wanted to introduce myself and share a brief story about my journey with bipolar, depression and anxiety.

At twelve years old I moved from South Africa to New Zealand. We were so poor at that time. It was then that I became a target for bullies. My parents were stressed and fighting alot at the time so I told nobody I was being bullied. Anxiety was something I started to experience when I was roughly seven years old because of my dyslexia.

After being bullied for years and moving from one place to the next because of dads work I was hit hard with depression at the age of nineteen. Back then I didn't know I had depression. I started to drink to try and numb some of the pain. By the age of 23 I was definitely an alcoholic.

When I was 24 I moved to Australia after being in an abusive relationship. I needed a fresh start. For five years after that I began to struggle with my mood, sleep and severe depression and anxiety. When I was twenty nine I just wasn't coping with life and I had a nervous breakdown and was taken to hospital. I was given the diagnosis bipolar disorder due to my mood swings.

It was during the darkest time in my life I realised how strong I am. I was put on so many medications with loads of terrible side effects that one day I tried to end my life.

I was hospitalized twice after that. Then I had CBT therapy and I did Art therapy. My psychiatrist finally found the right medication for me after so much trial and error. I quit drinking, started walking for exercise and eating healthier. My new partner proposed and I got married.

Then came the news that my husband couldn't have children. But I was determined to be a mum and stick by my husband no matter what. Where there is a will there is a way. We ended up having a donor child which was very stressful at first but now the best thing that has ever happened to us.

It has been one hell of a journey. I'm still learning every day. Today I have more good days than bad and I'm really enjoying life. I actually never thought I'd say that but here I am and doing well. I often think about if I had taken my life that day I wouldn't have what I have today. All I can say to anyone struggling is to keep going, stay strong, this will pass and tomorrow is a brand new day.

It's not a easy journey. When I came out on the other side I was so grateful to experience happiness again after years of struggle and challenges. I'm not completely cured but I have learnt how to cope.

Never give up 😊

[Ggrand]

Hello Niks85...

I would like to warmly welcome you to these forums...

Thank you for sharing your story..

You have been through so many hard times and have come out of it on top...Which does take a lot of hard work and a strong want to heal....Congratulations Niks85..

Your very inspirational story will help many people here that are struggling with depression, anxiety and other mental health issues..

It’s always so heartwarming listen to such a positive story..

Kind thoughts with care..

Grandy..

[Tay100]

Hi Niks85

Cheers for stopping by on the forums, it's great to have you with us!

Thank you for sharing your story and wellbeing journey- seeing other people's ups and downs, triumphs and challenges can provide other people with hope, guidance and insight into their own wellbeing journey, which we love on the forums. Most importantly, it lets people know that whilst no one is perfect or "cured", as you say, we aren't ever alone. Feel free to share some of your coping strategies that work for you in your day to day life, if you like, we'd love to hear them!

Sending kindness,

Tay100

[Niks85]

Hi Grandy

Thanks for your warm welcome and kind words. Yes it definitely does take work but worth it. I'm more than happy to share my story 😊

[Niks85]

Thanks Tay100 for your kind words

I would be happy to share what has helped me cope.

The first is always being kind to myself by avoiding negative self talk. As I mentioned I had CBT therapy which has changed the way I think. If I change the way I think about things it changes my emotions and the way I feel. I used to catastrophize. My therapist would say not to worry about things that had not happened yet and only worry about what I can control. The other thing is to avoid should's for example like I should have done this.

Some other tips I've learnt would be

No matter how bad you are feeling always get out of bed and have a small goal to achieve each day and be proud of any achievements.

Watch the foods I'm putting in my body I try to eat healthy

When I can I try to get some sunshine

I go for a walk each day for exercise while listening to upbeat music

Get a good nights sleep and if I'm not sleeping I make an apointment with my GP

Avoid or limit alcohol. It's challenging but alcohol has always made things worse for me

I like to always have something to look forward to even if it's in a years time

I try not to beat myself up over mistakes I make and I try not to compare myself to others

Two of the biggest things for me personally have been letting go in order to move forward and gratitude. Being grateful even for the small things in life helps

If I'm having a bad day I think tomorrow is a new day. I give myself time to heal. When I was going through a tough, hellish time I kept thinking life can only get better. Like the quote hitting rock bottom doesn't mean you have to stay there. The only way is up.

Something else that works is art therapy and you dont need to be artistic to do it. For people like myself who struggle with expressing myself it works. The bonus is that you can do it at home there's loads of ideas on google plus it's fun.

Talking to a trustworthy friend, support group or family member has helped

Avoid too much social media but stay connected at the same time and especially at the moment I only watch the news once a day

Being around nature and animals helps me too

I hope that helps in some way😊

[Tay100]

Hi Niks85

Thanks for sharing that lovely list, it will surely resonate with others and help them in numerous ways- I found it very interesting and appreciate your opening up here.

Feel free to use this thread to continue your mental health journey, we'd love o keep hearing from you!