Worst Joke Wednesday

[Neil_1]

Hi all

I know a while back there was a thread with some jokes on it - just to try and lighten the load for folk and to provide a few jolly japes and spiffy spifferoons (those words etched in my memory bank from the late and great Kenny Everitt).  However, I was far to lazy to try and find the other thread, so thought I'd start up a new one WJW.

Here we go people, something to start you off with:

"When I was a small boy, I had a dog named Tax.  I'd open the door and "Income Tax""

"That very same year, I had a bird called Enza.  I'd open the window and "Influenza"

Now, they can't be done on any other day - for it is after all, Worst Joke Wednesday.

See if you can beat either of those?

[Ggrand]

Hello everyone...🤗..

Why was everybody so tired on April 1st?

Because they just finished a March of 31 days!

[Banksy92]

Did you hear about the street walker in Venice?

They drowned.

(sorry not quite Wednesday but this gave me a giggle)

[Croix]

First one says: So i heard that you're good swimmer.
Second one replies: Yeah, I was a postman in Venice for 4 years.

[Ggrand]

My friend was living in Venice, Italy. Neither-land Nor-way.

[quirkywords]

I was going to quit all my bad habits for the new year,

but then I remembered that nobody likes a quitter.

[Croix]

My New Year's resolution is to procrastinate. I'll start tomorrow.

[Croix]

What does the little Champagne bottle call his father?

Pop!

[quirkywords]

The older I get, the earlier it gets late.

[Croix]

The older I get the less answers I know

(I'm not sure if this is a joke or just life:(

[Ggrand]

Hello Everyone.....🤗🌹

You know you’re old when the candles cost more than the cake.......anyway....We’re not old… we’re recycled teenagers.🌹💚...