Worst Joke Wednesday

[Neil_1]

Hi all

I know a while back there was a thread with some jokes on it - just to try and lighten the load for folk and to provide a few jolly japes and spiffy spifferoons (those words etched in my memory bank from the late and great Kenny Everitt).  However, I was far to lazy to try and find the other thread, so thought I'd start up a new one WJW.

Here we go people, something to start you off with:

"When I was a small boy, I had a dog named Tax.  I'd open the door and "Income Tax""

"That very same year, I had a bird called Enza.  I'd open the window and "Influenza"

Now, they can't be done on any other day - for it is after all, Worst Joke Wednesday.

See if you can beat either of those?

[Croix]

What do you call a dream about paint?
A pigment of your imagination!

[eight]

i can make an earthy pigment out of beef but its pretty meaty ochre

[Ggrand]

A rich guy hires an out of work Mexican to do some work...
The guy hands him a 5 gallon bucket of green paint and says..... "Go around the side of the house, and paint my porch."

The Mexican knocks on the door a few hours later and says, "I'm finished mister......but I have to tell you, that was no porch, that was a Mercedes."
👍🏼

[Russian_Red_Foxx]

Eating a clock is very time consuming.

[Croix]

How can you tell when your clock is hungry?
It goes back four seconds.

[Ggrand]

What did digital clock say to Grandfather clock?

"Look Grandpa, no hands!"

[Croix]

I’ve just been fired from the clock making factory after all those extra hours I put in.

[Ggrand]

Hello everyone...🤗

I just quit my job at a can crushing factory....

It was soda-pressing...

[Ggrand]

Hello Everyone.....🤗..

I just got over my addiction of Chocolate, marshmallows and nuts.....

I won’t lie.....It was a rocky road..😁

[Croix]

Oh dear 😫 - O well, 2 for the price of one😋

I heard a joke about chocolate bars, and it wasn’t that funny. So I just snickered.

and ...

If Bob has 30 chocolate bars and eats 25, what does he have?
Diabetes.