Worst Joke Wednesday

[Neil_1]

Hi all

I know a while back there was a thread with some jokes on it - just to try and lighten the load for folk and to provide a few jolly japes and spiffy spifferoons (those words etched in my memory bank from the late and great Kenny Everitt).  However, I was far to lazy to try and find the other thread, so thought I'd start up a new one WJW.

Here we go people, something to start you off with:

"When I was a small boy, I had a dog named Tax.  I'd open the door and "Income Tax""

"That very same year, I had a bird called Enza.  I'd open the window and "Influenza"

Now, they can't be done on any other day - for it is after all, Worst Joke Wednesday.

See if you can beat either of those?

[Croix]

Hooray -I'm early:)

What do you call a spider with 20 eyes?

Spiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiider

[Whatsinaname]

Did you hear the one about the circus fire?

It was in tents!

[Eagle Ray]

Hehehe, very good Croix and Whatsinaname.

Why did the human cannon-ball have to leave the circus?

He got fired.

[sbella02]

Here's a little bit of a dark one I heard today (trigger warning - death/remains):

I heard glass coffins are making a comeback: remains to be seen.

[sbella02]

Croix, your spider joke cracked me up!

[Croix]

A man tried ot sell me a coffin today,

I told him it was the last thing I needed.

[Eagle Ray]

Why did the funeral home employee take a throat lozenge after the back door of the hearse fell open going up a hill?

Because the coffin wouldn’t stop.

[Eagle Ray]

What kind of vegetable thinks it has sophisticated humour?

An arty-joke (artichoke)

(Sorry, that’s terrible 🙈)

[Croix]

An even worse one 😞

What vegetable do you need when you get a flat tire?

A-spare-I-guess.

[Eagle Ray]

Hehehe, I like that Croix 😀

What kind of vegetable makes chickens happy?

Bok Joy! 🐔