Terrified of losing teeth and extreme dental anxiety

[CMF]

I went to the dentist last November after not having been for many, many, many years. I have straight, white teeth so thought I didn't need to go however notices tartar build up and a slightly wobbly front tooth so the panic made me go.

I had x rays & full check up. I was told that my teeth are actually quite good, good colour and I have no bone loss however have gum recession from over brushing and a build up of plaque under the gums. I had a clean done and was to go back after a few weeks for another clean which I did not as xmas approached a things got a bit busy. I went back for another apt as a tooth was bothering me and saw a different dentist as my apt got mixed up. i told him my gum recession freaks me out, he assured me by changing how im brushing and by flossing it can be controlled and he has seen 10 times worse, not to worry. I felt he was very thorough in his explanations and decided to see him again when a tooth was bothering me. Upon examination he told I have gum disease which the first one didn't tell me. I was shocked. I had the choice of going to a periodontist who can perform a procedure to clean under the gums (this freaked me out) or have 3 monthly cleans a the dentist surgery to try and improve. if no improvement or it gets worse I will need a periodontist. i opted for he 3 monthly appts. I had the 1st clean a month ago. the hygienist was very happy he was able o get right under the gums and told me he could see no tooth movement and flossing has probably stabalised it. I told him of my anxiety over losing teeth, he told me I would not lose any in this lifetime! Last week my son had 4 wisdom teeth out, this caused some anxiety in me and my front top gums started to sting. I thought I flossed too hard. there is no redness, bleeding or swelling,they look fine. it is one area and I'm freaking out, thinking it is bacteria/plaque eating away at my teeth. it does stop sometimes ie when I eat or chew gum. out for dinner last night I had a panic that I wold need the periodontist procedure even though the dentist was happy a month ago. after having dinner it eased up and i relaxed as i spoke about it. I know someone who had painful stinging lips for months due to stress. I'm thinking of going back to dentist this week but don't want unnecessary things done. all this is giving me anxiety and panic. Its making me sick. I'm scared to go back and I'm scared to do nothing.

cmf

[pipsy]

Hey Paul, Don't be so hard on yourself. I've heard Synsodyne is suppose to be excellent. It's toothpaste isn't it, or is it a mouth wash/rinse? If it works great. Anything's worth trying. As I said the only thing I would walk away from is Bonjela. Cmf, the only thing that concerns me is whether you may have a slight gum infection. If you do, your dentist really is your best bet. Gums get infected by all sorts of things. Try not to panic (know it's hard), try the synsodyne by all means. If it doesn't work I would strongly suggest you see your dentist, to alleviate the possibility of it being an infection.

Lynda

[CMF]

This is the thing, I have no redness, swelling or bleeding. I feel a little tingle here and there but I also thought my lip was stinging earlier. My previous problem has improved. I'm just freaking out now that I used the aloe vera gel. I can picture it penetrating my gums and eatin away at the roots of my teeth.

At my local café I see the same woman with hr 2 kids every thuirsday. as we were chatting toda I mentioned my son having his wisdom teeth out, silly me. this started a conversation about the dental work her husband had done that went wrong and his whole jaw became infected and she needed something done as she fell off her bike and damaged her front teeth. she mentioned how people judge you when you have missing teeth. in one way I felt better as they have needed and had work done and survived. I don't need anything done so far,and hopefully wont.

I think the word disease just makes me feel worse. Gum disease, which can be controlled.Ive had my teeth professionally cleaned, maintain proper oral hygiene, haven't been eating sugar, in fact I'm scared to eat much at all. Disease - I picture something eating away at my teeth and gums. I'm sure if I had some other disease or illness I would be the same. ie if I had cancer I would picture it invading my body, killing healthy cells, if I had diabetes I would be scared of losing toes or something.

In the 10 years I didntgo to tge dentist I rarely had concerns. I didn't even notice my receeding gums. I jut smiled and went on with things. now I'm paranoid about everything I do, eating, smiling, drinking.

I need to remember that 1 month ago I let the dentists surgery happy with the outcome and feedback I got. they got right under the gums and were happy with what I was doing. they gave me confidence. I'm scared of the dentist now as he could be the bearer of bad news. if nothing hurts, no bleeding or redness or swelling why am I freaking out? my 12 year old this morning told me I have the best smile, she loves it. no one else can see anything wrong, why do see all these problems?

I'm babbling, I know. just thinking out loud.

cmf

[Guest_1055]

Dear cmf ( who is moving forward)

You are seeing all these problems through a pair of anxiety glasses. You can't see things clearly or see things for how they really are. It is the anxiety/fear talking.

Also when you were younger, were there issues there, in regards to going to visit the dentist, like were you frightened as a little girl? I know I was back then. But because I hardly ever spoke, no one was aware of the fear that I felt.

Also was there anyone that said something like this to you when you were a little girl......." If you don't brush you teeth probably they will fall out". Because if someone said this to you, and even if they meant well, and were really trying to encourage you to brush your teeth, well I think it can sow a bit of unhealthy fear into some children. And just maybe over the years, the tiny bit of fear you felt back then, grew and grew until it is almost overwhelming.

I don't know about this for sure, but sometimes I think it helps to look at where it all started or the root cause of some issues, including the one you are experiencing at the moment.

Anyway cmf, I just thought I would mention all that in hope it may help and because I care about you and long for you to be free.

In kindness

Shell xx

[pipsy]

Hi cmf. Perhaps you're one of these people who constantly need reassuring that all is well. It's better to be wise and know there's nothing to worry about, than do nothing and put up with not knowing. Unfortunately, there is always going to be someone with a horror story about how so and so lost his teeth or got sick from a severe gum disease. I think, in future when this happens, the best course of action for you is just to say, how sorry you are, how unfortunate for whoever and leave it at that.

Lynda

[CMF]

Thank you beautiful Shell,

I like this line "You are seeing all these problems through a pair of anxiety glasses. You can't see things clearly or see things for how they really are. It is the anxiety/fear talking." One month ago the discussion with the dentist/hygienist was that we would work together to get this under control. There was news and good news, no 'bad' news. Since then I got the call for my on to have his wisdoms out earlier than was originally booked as they had a cancellation. I think this has triggered everything and probably even the gum irritation I had as they look fine. Stress affects us in many ways.

As child I was terrified of the dentist. I could smell it from outside on the street. the wating room was small and dingy thn you had to walk up some steep stairs to get to the consulting rooms which again where dull and small. As a child I had all my back teeth removed by the dentist as they were rotten. I had a general anaesthetic and remember being in pain for so long afterwards with stitches in my gums that I could feel. they irritated me and hurt. As i was being put to sleep i was holding my mums hand. she told afterwrd that my grip became so tight they couldnt get her hand out of mine. I couldn't eat and I remember them bleeding and swollen. I remember lying on the couch at home in pain and it stung eve to just have broth. I think this is what triggered the anxiety with my son. He was in pain for a short time after the surgery but with pain killers and icing it, it subsided and I think he recovered quite well and quickly.

I guess my childhood experience explains why I'm son scared of needing anything done. it was so traumatic.

cmf (thinking of changing this to DaybyDay)

[CMF]

I remember popping into the BB café after my last dental appt. this was the appt where I had the clean done after my dentist told me I have some gum disease (that yucky word again), which can be controlled. I thought id go back and find my post as I remember it being positive. this is what it said:

"My gums are no where near as bad as I convinced myself they would be and the hygienist found no mobility in my front bottom teeth, possibly as I e been flossing and he thinks the extra care I've been taking has stabilised them. He says I shouldn't be losing any teeth in this lifetime, we will see but for now it was a good outcome. It will take a while for me to accept all this and not still be anxious, but that's just me."

cmf

Ill need to keep reminding myself of this.

[blondguy]

Hey cmf and Lynda and everybody

Synsodyne is a toothpaste. I have gum recession which makes for sensitivity and sometimes pain...it gets rid of the over sensitized feeling in the mouth and teeth...Expensive but rocks 🙂

Paulx

[Lost_Girl]

Hey cmf,

Paul mentioned listerine before. That's a mouthwash with a small amount of alcohol in it. You can get one for sensitive teeth too - my dentist gave me one last visit so you can know it is dentist approved cmf.

Cheers,

Carol

[CMF]

That's interesting,

my dentist mentioned they only recommend mouthwash with no alcohol...

hmmmm

cmf

[pipsy]

Hi cmf. Please, please don't take this the wrong way. It's possible your dentist told you there was no alcohol content in the mouthwash so you wouldn't be overly worried. Perhaps he realised your fears and anxieties and was trying to soothe you. I'm not saying for sure, but when professionals work with people who have anxieties, often they will try to eliminate unnecessary concerns. The dentist I used to attend was brilliant in that he never hurried me when I visited. I have top and bottom dentures which he made and fitted. I had to return to him several times and he was extremely patient, kind, understanding. He would always reassure me that anytime I needed to return, he would rather that than have me suffer unnecessarily. He did tell me that when dentists, technicians etc are undergoing training, they are taught also to recognise fear and anxiety in patients. The fear and anxiety is real to the patient and the dentist has to be aware of this as well.

Lynda