Struggling to move on

[Alel]

So I recently got diagnosed with severe anxiety and depression. I had to go into psychiatrist care and take medication. I'm now at the beginning of taking new medication and it is working well. I am still working on some fears of mine like emetophobia and agoraphobia. As well as working on my anxious and depressive thoughts. I still find it hard to do simple tasks that I am more than capable of physically doing them, just mentally draining for HOURS.

For the most part, I am doing really well. I stopped having panic attacks and major depression. But I'm finding it hard to move on from what I went through. I'm afraid it might happen again or that it's something so serious I shouldn't just continue with life. I don't want to revolve my anxiety and depression around my whole life but I'm also afraid that I won't be ready if it come back. I don't know what this feeling is. I still got so much work to do and to heal from so much, but all I feel like doing is sitting on my phone for the whole day. I can't stop thinking about what I went through and what was happening before. 

[Alel]

I'm genuinely feeling okay but it's scaring me. Why am I scared that I feel okay. I feel really on edge. Please someone help. 

[4CatWonder]

Hi Alel, I very much relate to this and those feelings are really valid and understandable and so is that need to escape and or, at least for me, to disassociate or detach... and it's really good you have shared your feelings too, I often find if I can just say outloud/or be heard in some way, my brain can start to accept those feelings with less judgement of myself...

I am not sure if I have any advice / or rather I can't make the right words come out of my brain right now.

I've found reading many of the resources online helpful, and sometimes the information resonates with me, or I'll learn a new tip (like washing my face with cold water to help me change my focus when I'm spiralling) and finding that just looking at some flowers in my backyard or a bird out my window while feeling the sun on my face. 

Best wishes

🐈

[Richju]

Hi Alel,

I can understand how scared you feel after what you have been through but I believe your anxiety and depression is less likely to return as you begin to develop some positive habits.

I know how unmotivated you must feel but I don't believe sitting on your phone is the answer. Perhaps if you made a list of other activities you could be doing and timed your phone usage, say to one hour after each meal then try to do just one thing on your list, say walking outdoors for a while and noticing the natural environment, playing your favourite music or taking a long hot shower.

At first, it will probably feel quite difficult to do these activities but after a while you might come to enjoy your surroundings and taking care if yourself more.

Overcoming mental health issues is just as difficult as recovering from a physical illness. It won't happen all at once but gradually I'm sure you'll find more pleasure in life and your worries about your mental health issues returning will lessen.

I hope this has been helpful and wish you the very best. I look forward to your further postings so that I can celebrate your gradual recovery with you.

Take care,

Richju