Struggling to get by

[Gizmo83]

I was diagnosed with anxiety 18 months ago and it was such a relief to know that it had a name. I've always had to be strong. So many things have happened in my life and everyone has just expected me to deal with it, so thats what I did. It didn't help, it festered and became worse than ever. Now it's got to a point where I feel I'm spinning out of control. My partner and I are having issues because he doesn't know if he can handle it. I'm left in limbo because I have no control over my future, its all in his hands. I don't know what to do anymore. I can't eat or sleep properly, my emotions are out of control and the techniques I've used in the past are no longer working. Im having fewer and fewer times of calm and clarity and its killing me and my relationship. I don't know how to stop

[Blue_Jane]

Hi Gizmo

First of all welcome and thanks for taking the time to share what is going on with you. Its very brave to reach out and ask for support. Hopefully we can help - or at least show you that you are not alone.

You mention being diagnosed 18 months ago - was this by a GP? Sounds like it might be time to go back for another appointment and explain how you are currently feeling. The GP might have some new techniques for you to try.

I too was relieved when I was diagnosed with anxiety, it gave a name to my crazy thoughts, irrational outbursts and moods. Although even when I was diagnosed it took a while for my relationship to go back to what it was - as it wasn't an overnight fix. I can now say that nearly 18 months on, my anxiety is manageable (not perfect) and I have a few things that I do every day to keep my mind well:

- exercise, normally outside (even when it is dark and rainy, it still makes me feel good)

- eating fresh food where possible (not packaged)

- taking medication (this is a personal choice, I tried natural alternatives first)

- regular massage

- time out for just me time

- deep breathing exercises

- telling my husband when I feel the anxiety coming on, or overwhelmed or not handling things well.

I have also tried meditation, acupuncture and various apps - I still go to these methods but they are just not daily.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Blue Jane

[MarkJT]

Gizmo, welcome to the forums and as is said above by Blue Jane, awesome that you have reached out to seek some advice.

I was diagnosed with PTSD, depression and anxiety in 2013 and like you, it was good to put a name to the crazy thoughts i was having.

I fully agree with the great advice that is given by Blue Jane but i just want to touch on mindfulness. It is a type of meditation and once you get a grasp of it you can do it anywhere at anytime and it has helped me with my anxiety a lot.

If you could download the app, "Smiling Mind" or "Buddhify" (I have both) and start practising. Each track is only 10 or so mins, with some shorter and some longer. If you are consistant with this, you can start to control your anxiety.

So when i start to feel an attack coming on, i stop what i am doing and concentrate on something. It might be clouds, the stars or the engineering of a building. There is so many things you can bring yourself into the moment, which is what mindfulness is about.

Be assured that with the right treatment and work by you, you can get on top of it and learn to live with it. Getting to know your triggers is important and then working out how to combat them.

Look forward to hearing back and lets see if we can help guide you through your journey.

Mark.

[geoff]

hi Gizmo, when you are told to 'get over it and deal with it' was what people were told many years ago, simply because no one knew how to cope with depression or even what to say, so in other words, they didn't want to be involved.
It doesn't matter how big, strong or determined you are, depression can come through all of this, there are no barriers capable of stopping this illness until you start to get help either with medication, counselling or both, which is more preferable.
Talk to your partner and say that you are going to see your doctor for help, that's the first step, and perhaps if you download all the information about depression by clicking 'Get Support' at the top of this page, this will be able to help you as well as your partner to understand what you are struggling with, and please remember that depression is now rife in our society today, where nobody ever knows who else is being troubled by it, as it's a predominantly common illness.
Blue Jane has a list of very good ideas for you to try and break away from this illness, but I'm not sure whether you are having any treatment, as it was diagnosed 18 months ago, and one thing to always remember, is that once you start to fall back into the grip of depression, that's when you need to get all the help you can.
Please let us know how you are getting on. Geoff.