social anxiety: help me!

[bec126]

idk what to do. i have been doing a lot of research online and online tests for social anxiety and they have all said i suffer from social anxiety. I'm only 13 so i can't go to a GP because that would involve me telling my mum and i am way too scared to do that. i know a lot of people will say "just tell your mum it will be worth it" but i just cant bring myself to do it. yes i trust my mum and i know i can tell her anything but just the thought of talking to her about this is too daunting. i would love it if someone could please help me. it would be awesome and super helpful.

[white knight]

Hi Bec. Welcome

Its good you have done some research. It helps us identify with the possibles.

However, often we, the unprofessional, are wrong in our assumptions.

For example for years I thought I had adhd, I took medication for that for 6 years. Turned out I had mania...similar symptoms, different meds!

In your case your age plays a vital role in diagnosis. There's o getting away from a proper diagnosis. That means a visit to your GP.

Ask mum if you can have a check up. Or can you visit your school nursewhen you restart school?

Thanks for posting. You can use the search feature here too.

Tony WK

[Sad_Mushroom]

Hi Bec,

Wow, you certainly are organised for 13yo. Good on you for researching and reaching out.

Do you have an aunty or bigger sister, someone older that you trust that you could talk to or that could take you to the doctors?

If there was someone, you might be able to talk to them and then approach your mother together so that it wouldn't be so daunting.

One thing I would like to suggest is to try keeping a diary of how you are feeling and what is making you feel that way. Even if you write it in your own code so that no one else would understand it. I say this because when I was young and finally tried to open up about how I felt, I panicked and it all came out wrong. If you keep a diary of how you feel and what makes you feel that way, then you can read from it later or just hand it over without having to say a word.

You've taken a big step by researching and seeking help. You should be proud of yourself!

SM

[Shellz__22]

Hi Bec

First of all, Thank you and well done for recognising that something is not right and seeking help. It is a really brave thing to do.

I would recommend talking to someone - even if it's not your mum. I would suggest a school chaplin or guidance counsellor, these are people that you can talk to that are required to keep your confidence unless your safety is at risk. You can usually make an appointment by emailing them (its way less daunting than asking face to face!) if you are comfortable I would also suggest explaining a little of why you want to see them.

Writing down what you are thinking and feeling is also a good idea, during times like these everything tends to get a bit jumbled and sometimes it can help to get everything a bit straighter.

While you are working on telling someone else, other things that can help are breathing exercises, or creating certain strategies for situations that make you nervous - for example exiting the room for 2.5 minutes every 1/2 hr when it's crowded.

Last little advice - the internet is great but try not to get sucked into the "great vortex of doom" as that can often make you feel worse. Sites like beyond blue are great as they focus on solutions and strategies but I would stay away from the medical sites, for now, it will only make you worry even more!

S.

[bec126]

hey

thanks for your help, i understand that i really should go to a GP but i havent had a check up in so many years so if i said that out of the blue my mum would just be like "what?". My mum works at my high school and so she knows both the nurses really well and so does the school psych and they all know me and they would think it would be weird and they would probably talk to my mum the second i told them. thanks for the advice though

blessings

-Bec

[bec126]

hi there

my mum is the person i trust the most so it would be even harder and more scary for me to tell someone other than her. i like the idea of the book, thanks for the advice

blessings

-Bec

[blondguy]

Hello Bec126

You are strong for having posted and reached out! Good on you!

Researching is commendable but please be careful with the internet as there are so many variations and different opinions where anxiety/social anxiety is concerned.

Shellz__22 wrote a great post just above that was very accurate when we are trying to figure out what wrong...

Shellz_22 mentioned "the internet is great but try not to get sucked into the "great vortex of doom" as that can often make you feel worse. Sites like beyond blue are great as they focus on solutions and strategies but I would stay away from the medical sites, for now, it will only make you worry even more"!

I understand that your mum works at a high school but any school counselor is not allowed to repeat anything you say as then they would be in serious trouble by not abiding by the privacy act....and school counselors/GP's are very aware that they cant breach your trust no matter what you say to them

You are an achiever and proactive with your health Bec and thats great.

A face to face appointment with your GP/School Counselor will provide some joy and peace of mind.

You have everything to gain and nothing to lose by giving it a go!

You are always welcome to post as many times as you wish. There are gentle people on the forums that can be here for you.

You do possess great strength Bec and thankyou for being a part of the Beyond Blue forums too!

My Kind thoughts

Paul