Small business pressure -How do I keep pushing through when I’m drained physically and mentally.

[Loz_06]

I took over a hair salon business when I was 24 years old I’m now 31.

It started with myself, a close friend who was my business partner and 1 apprentice.

i was the hairdresser my friend who I went into business was the Bookeeper.

From day 1 it has not stopped with the challenges. My business partner was constantly taking money out aswelll as putting it back, i regularly voiced my concerns and it took me 2 years to finally have enough of the financial strain she put on me. I was already operating the floor, hiring staff, training them, doing clientele, working 44 hours with little to no lunch breaks. I decided to call the accountant to work out a buy out figure to which he told me he hasn’t done the books since we started. Turned out the tax and super that was being paid was straight to her personal account and got spent. I was in court for 3 years disputing it. First year into court, covid hit. Now I was fighting to keep the businesss I worked so very hard for. With lockdowns of a total of 9 months over 2 years without funding was stressful to say the least. I recently decided to put my business up for sale as my mental health has completely deteriorated the last 2 years, I was constantly getting sick, trying to still work and manage 4 employees that iv had since they where apprentices. 2 months into it being advertised and 2 months out from Christmas 2 of my employees handed there resignation in not for any bad reason other than it was time for them to explore a new direction. I was happy for them personally but on a Business level it left me with one hell of situation. It took me 5 years in total to train them up to fall apart in 2 months right before the madness. I’m worried I can’t keep fighting through all these obstacles that come my way with so little energy as it is. I’m having panic attacks during work, I’m run off my feet and I’m working more hours to cover the clients who where booked in with the 2 girls who are no longer here. I’m exhausted mentally and physically and I feel trapt till I can sell it. I’m having manic crying episodes nearly every night after work dreading each day that comes. I’m starting to loose control of my emotions within work and can’t hold back them tears. 
I can’t take time off now being so close to Xmas with only 2 partimers left and one being an apprentice.

financially iv ran at a loss the last 2 years and the pressures are suffocating me.

Any advice on how to manage the pressure and self care with little time to do so?!

[Croix]

Dear Loz-06

Welcome here to the Forum. Probably a pretty good place to come to get fresh perspective

I'm sorry all your work has been sabotaged by such a dishonest person, and that Covid hit at the worst time. I hpe you can sell up promptly and maybe work for someone else for a while.

From what you wrote your business is filling your who life with no respite, and naturally enough  that it is taking its toll on you with exhaustion and great emotional upheaval, even dispare

While the efforts to sell the business to sell on go may I suggest that you take steps so that all your life in not one ceaseless train of worry and gloom Do you think it is possible to take an hour of an evening to do something completely different and take you away from all your very real worries?

In order to make my mind stop and go in a different direction, leaving the ceaseless loop of worry behind I use a free smartphone program called Smiling Mind. This has umpteen exercises for all different sorts of people and is surprisingly effective -after practice.

I fine I come out of it feeling calm. Basically it consists of lots of exercises to make your  mind concentrate on the feelings around you, or else to watch a leaf in a stream, or something else. It caters to all levels.  I have the attention span of a gold-fish, but found an exercise that sited me, where a voice gently steers my mind back from wandering frequently enough to be effective.

The idea you will be able to get calm later in the day I find is something to look forward to.

I know this does not help with your business problems and overwork, however it may make things easier to cope with

Croix

[Loz_06]

Thankyou so much for your response, I really appreciate you taking the time to write such a thoughtful response.

I have felt so alone in dealing with all the pressures over the years and it’s felt like I’ve been in fight mode for so long!

I will most definitely give that app a go! I have ADHD so sounds like it will be perfect for me to take my mind off things.

i find myself so tired each day that i struggle to do something that will give me respite.

I find iv trained my mind the last 7 years to be time productive and from my business partner dispute I had to learn the payroll system and everyday bookkeeping admin, checking emails, paying bills, reconciling transactions outside of the physicalitys of the working role of hairdressing and it’s like if i don’t do it, everything will fall apart.

Im very much a people pleaser and I struggle opening up as I don’t want to burden anyone with my problems as I know what it’s like to deal with problems of your own and other peoples problems on top can be overwhelming to deal with.

I have seen counselors, psychologists, life coaches, reiki healers I just never end up sticking with it!  

Your advice has really comforted me and I will most definitely give it a try!

Thankyou kindly !

[Croix]

Dear Loz_06~

I'm please you will give it a trial. All the work you do , not only the actual hairdressing, but all those other complicated time consuming things can take over life.

The reason I find Smiling Mind helps me I believe is it is not passive like watching TV or a movie is. It needs activity to make it work, and I think that mental activity or effort in a strange environment removed from everyday life is the important part.

After you have given it a week or so you might like to say how you are getting on

Croix

[Guest_46079180]

i just wanted to let you know that you’re not alone. Running a small business is incredibly tough. And lonely. 

is there a female business support network in your area? It can help to have others who know what it is like to help and bounce ideas off.