Skeletons

[Whatsinaname]

Hi everyone,

I am going through a pretty rough time at the moment. Had a panic attack on sunday after a movie triggered a memory of something I regret.

Just wondering if anyone is haunted by skeletons that are well over a decade ago? And if so does anyone have any tips of loosening their grip on you?

Thanks as always

[missep123]

Hi Whatsinaname,

That must have been really challenging for it to creep up on you like that! How have you been feeling since? Unfortunately triggers can pop up from anywhere at any time it seems 😞

Can I ask, do you see a mental health professional like a psychologist?

I'm here for you. I'm really glad that you reached out to the forums because you'll find that you're not alone. Even for myself I know a lot of people who were recently triggered by things that happened a long time ago.

[Soberlicious96]

Dear Whatsinaname,

Welcome to Beyond Blue and well done for reaching out.

And yes, I can certainly identify with being 'haunted by skeletons' ..... both by traumas that happened to me, and by things that I have done.

I find that the most helpful thing is to bring your mind into the moment; the right here, right now. When the memories arise, bring your mind into the now by focusing on what you can see, smell, hear, touch and taste.

It helps too, that whatever it is that you did way back when, remind yourself that you are not doing it today.

We've all done things we regret. But as the saying goes, if you drive along looking in your rear vision mirror, eventually you're gonna crash right into something that you couldn't even see in front of you.

Anyway, perhaps too it could be time to get some counseling? It might help to talk to someone about it a bit more, yeah?

In the meantime, you can come back here as much as you like.

Take care, I'll be thinking of you. xo

[Whatsinaname]

Thank you both! I do see a psychologist on and off. Probably a couple of times a year. I managed to book to see him tomorrow, but it is via zoom which brings it's own anxiety.

I always try and tell my I'm not who I was then and I didnt know all the information etc, but sometimes I just cant stop the sinking.

Yesterday I thought I was coming out of it but today I'm back to square one.

I'm a guy, so crying always feels a bit uncomfortable, but tonight I broke down when my 2 year old son hugged me. I don't even really know why.

[pinwheel23]

Hi Whatsinaname,

I want to tell you that crying is okay, and a good way for us to release out emotions. I know guys are often told crying is not acceptable. But I hope it's something that overtime, you feel more comfortable with.

Unfortunately triggers don't seem to have a particular time frame and it must have been overwhelming for you to unexpectedly be faced with a panic attack. I hope your psychologist appointment went well today. Perhaps they were able to give you some more information and strategies to manage these feelings. Doing things via zoom definitely comes with its own anxious feelings, so great job booking it in spite of that.

-pinwheel23

[Whatsinaname]

Thank Pinwheel,

My anxiety is through the roof today, but I think that is simply due to the zoom app in about half an hour.

I usually come out of these appointments feeling better, so fingers crossed for that.

I've also prepared a bit better this time, I have written what triggered me, the following days and what happened. I hope that makes it easier for him to understand my struggles.

I will report back if he appreciated me doing it or if was bad to dwell on it.

[pinwheel23]

Writing it out is a great approach. You'll be better able to get all your feelings out and keeping track of what happened and when, will help you not feel too flustered during the session.

Looking forward to hearing how it goes 🙂

[Whatsinaname]

A bit of a delayed follow up, but he did appreciate my notes. Mostly because I outlined what triggered my panic attack.

He has pointed out that I catastropise a lot and then spend the following days/weeks trying to "fix" that worry.

My rational mind agrees, I just need my subconscious mind to leave me alone for a while.

It helped me stumbled onto "unwinding anxiety." I've only just started the free part but really like it.

Just wondering if anyone has any experience with it as it's very expensive and I dont want to waste money on it.

[missep123]

Hi Whatsinaname,

I'm really glad that you booked a psychologist appointment when you needed it! How do you feel after having the appointment?

I haven't heard of 'unwinding anxiety' but what I have found personally helpful is TED talks! I even have rented books fro the library about anxiety and mindfulness and they have helped too!

It sounds like you are learning a lot about yourself and growing.