Physical symptoms, I fear I'm not going to see my kids grow up

[Mum02]

Hi, I am new to this, but since November, I have had sore chest, then. Progressed to me thinking about the worst, I now have got tingling all through my body, to the point, I feel like I'm not going to have long on this earth. In saying that, I have been to emergency room, all tests done. Nothing, then each week something else happens, my Dr sent me to a neurologist , all completely clear. I'm freaking out about cancers, sarcomas, as I am my worst enemy and Dr googled it. I went and got a second opinion, nothing except he thinks all my chest cartridge is inflamed. I have had test after test, my. Huge fear is that I'm not going to see my kids grow up. I am going for another mri for my spine. But both drs are both saying anxiety and possible fibromalgia, I am driving my family bonkers, my deepest fear is that they are going to come back and say sorry we misdiagnosed you and enjoy the time you have left. I cry at a drop of a hat, my body is in pain all the time with tingling. But this all started when I lost 2 members of the same family within 3months , all of a sudden and it bought back the memories of when my gorgeous brother passed away in 2009 from AML. I'm petrified, but my Dr has referred me to a psychologist.

[smallwolf]

Hi Mum02,

Welcome yo beyond blue.

Anxiety shows itself in different ways. There is the emotional side and worry. And then there is the physical side, Before medication my chest would feel tight and heart racing. While getting blood out one day, I mentioned this to the doctor and the feelings I was experiencing was similar to people who had heart attacks. Great, I thought, I cannot tell the difference.

Another time I was reading up something after having visited the psych, and like you went to Dr Google. Unfortunately it can paint a picture worse than reality. I mentioned what I had found to my psych, and she said, not to worry because you don't have that. At that stage, all I knew was that I had to go back to GP to get a mental health plan. It is "nice" to be able to have a label to associate with our pain(s). My dad had a tremor in his arm, and know (now) that is part of Parkinson's. Dad was anxious about what it was before hand because he did not know. And once you have some sort of the diagnosis you can work out what next steps might be? And the tingling feeling might be something and might also be anxiety.

Space won't allow to the tell the entire story here, but last year I was concerned between two blood tests if the possibility of prostate cancer. Left to our own thoughts we can (and will?) think the worst. So you are not alone, and certain that other members of the forum would have similar experiences to you.

You have said that you have been referred to a psychologist which will to look at the issue(s) from one perspective. I see a psychologist every 2 weeks and psychiatrist monthly and being able to talk about the things that are on my mind is helpful to me and we find way that I can use to cope with whatever negative thoughts I have.

If you are feeling stressed, there are threads on the forum for grounding and mindfulness that will give you ideas to help bring you (back) to the present moment. And if it helps to write these thoughts down, you can always write here? And people here will support you as we can in this space.

Peace and best wishes,

Tim

[Mum02]

Hey Smallwolf,

Thank you so much for your story and experiences. I wish your Dad well on his Parkinson's journey, I have had many friends with their parents with Parkinson's. It is amazing with all the treatments they have and are finding.

It is amazing what our minds do. My Dr said your mind is so powerful, and it can trick your body, if you let it. I apparently have always had anxiety according to my folks. But it has gotten extreme since all. These deaths of loved ones around me. Eveny gorgeous husband is saying the same thing.

I hope that seeing a psychologist and psychiatrist have helped you with your situation. Thank you again for sharing this with me.

Peace and best wishes to you too.

[Anxious_1]

Hi Mum02

I totally understand where youre coming from. I went through the same scary thoughts of cancer returning as I went thru breast cancer 3 yrs ago. I got anxious about constant reminders for mammograms and losing a close family member last yr to cancer a yr before in a short time as well as losing another family member of heart probs a yr later really can be scary and no surprise we let these real fears get into our brains and not be able to control our fears is terrifying for sure. I did counselling and found it helpful but lost anotha family as i finished my sessions to a heartattack- this really gave me anxiety that i was struggling to understand with wat was happening to me. I too felt i was losing my mind and felt my family just did not get what i was dealing with. I did not want ad meds but realised i had to try and stop the anxious feelings i was having daily. its only 3 weeks since i started, going ok and have started a new job and was scared anxiety was goin to affect my job but its going ok. There is Health anxiety when we have constant fears of death but with apps for mindfulness, seeing a counselor and meds this can just be a dealt with. It has been helping me so hope my story sheds light on your worries.

Take care and it would be good to talk to your gp as a starting pt and they can advise you on the best ways to deal with anxiety!