Panic Disorder/Anxiety When Not Working

[Nicki_85]

Hi All - I was wondering if anyone else gets this. Everytime I have time off from work my anxiety sky rockets, I recently had a baby and have taken a year off, 3 months into it and my anxiety and panic is getting difficult. Another new symptom I am getting is, I will be walking along the street and all of a sudden I feel like ive forgotton how to walk, also that my legs aren't mine or I don't feel connected to my legs?! This seems to happen on the days I'm tired if the baby had a late night. I also have been getting thoughts of 'is this real' like the feeling you get when your really engrossed in a movie and when it finishes you sort of 'come to' and everything feels a bit surreal. I never really experienced this much before, my history is of having a big panic attack once a year then go back to feeling like my normal self. I am on and SSRI medication 7 years and have a therapist. I have spoken to him about these symptoms and he has assured me its just a symptom of sever anxiety where your brain kind of 'shuts down' and that's why you feel disconnected. Please tell me I'm not insane and this might go away!!

[Franklin88]

Hi Nicki_85!

The symptoms you refer to are more common than you'd think in anxiety sufferers. It is called 'depersonalisation' or 'derealisation'. I've suffered with anxiety for nearly 20 years and about 5 years ago I had really bad depersonalisation for about 2 years. It was really scary and I developed pretty bad health anxiety thinking I had something really bad going on inside me. These are some of the things I'd felt;

• Floor dropping out from under me when I was standing
• Couldn't feel my legs when walking
• Felt like I was outside my body watching myself
• Laying in bed sometimes felt like I was floating
• Walking in bright places like supermarket aisles felt like there were spotlights on me and I couldn't even register what I was doing in there
• Talking to people and not feeling like I was able to understand simple concepts or even how I had replied to them

You're definitely not insane! I found reading up on what other people were experiencing in this regard was really helpful. As it often is the case with anxiety sufferers my anxiety shifted to focus on other areas and then one day I realised I didn't have those symptoms anymore. Id had them for so long I sort of forgot they were there and then one day they were just gone. Its very hard but just try to accept the feeling and allow yourself to be in the moment. It wont last forever!​

[MarkJT]

Nicki, you are not insane!! You have anxiety and it is a case of learning to ground yourself and learn to live with it, which can be done.

Have you ever practised mindfulness? If not, I well recommend taking it up. There is an awesome app called, "Smiling Mind" which is guided so it teaches you basically. Once you have a good grasp of it, you can do it anywhere. This helps when you are feeling very anxious to bring you back to being you.

When you say you have spoken to your therapist, how long ago was that? Just wanting to see that you are talking of the latest symptoms you have been having?

I cannot say that i have had that "disconnected" feeling but anxiety comes in so many shapes and forms, i do not doubt it!

Is the anxiety worse when you have nothing to do? With not being at work, we miss the structure in our lives and this could be contributing to it.

Mark.

[Nicki_85]

thanks for the message. yes I spoke to him just last week so he is in the know about whats going on. I have tried guided meditation but not mindfulness specifically. will def get that app!

[Nicki_85]

I really relate to those symptoms especially the floor! I have had to sit down before as I left I could just fall over. like my equilibrium if off. I'm so glad it got better for you !!

[MarkJT]

Nicki, great to hear that you are currently being treated. A tip for the app to, it is a learned skill so you will need to persist with it. Once you grasp the idea of mindfulness, you can do it anywhere without needing the app.

Cheers

Mark