OCD intrusive thoughts worse on SSRI

[Hylo46]

Hi there,

day 6 on SSRI (meds) and my intrusive thoughts are more prevelant and nastier - keep thinking I will act on the them due to the thoughts - anyone out there have a similar fear?

[MsPurple]

Hi Hylo46. I'm sorry you are struggling with intrusive thoughts. I know how terrible it has to have them constantly there. I know how scary it is.

SSRI can take up to a few weeks to take effect. They may not have taken an effect yet. I wouldn't be too concerned if the intrusive thoughts haven't decreased yet, this is normal on day 6. I would talk to your GP or counselor if they have increased. It could be due to increase stress or possibly the medication, as I am not a professional I can not tell you. Do not stop taking your medication unless you have been told to stop buy your GP or other dr/professional. It can actually make it worse taking yourself off them without medical supervision. I know it is frustrating. I have been there too, but stick at it and trust the dr. Unfortunately the first medication you get put on my not always be the right one. Mental illness medication works differently for different people, it isn't like antiobiotics and you can't tell how a person will react to it. I hope you get on the right ones soon, but just don't worry too much know. This is normal on day 6.

If you are really struggling with your intrusive thoughts feel free to call 1300224636. This is not just a suicide hotline, it is a generally counselling hotline too. If you are just needing someone to talk to help you through your intrusive thoughts they can help. I haven't personally called them, but my best friend did after a break up when she had intrusive thoughts and they really helped her.

Keep well and hope this has helped.

[MsPurple]

Sorry I just re-read this and I realised I had a fair number of typos. I used know instead of now and buy instead of by and buy instead of by. I am dyslexic so I do tend to miss these things until later.

[Hylo46]

Hi Ms Purple!

thank you for taking the time out to reply to me. I have been on them before but for some reason my intrusive thoughts have returned. My thoughts and obsessions are different off them, but when I go back on them they get nastier and I link the pills to me doing something horrible to my family etc... it's frustrating because I know the pills can help,yet they make the thoughts even more distressing because I think I'm going to harm someone impulsively, acting on a thought. Damned if I do, damned if I don't get!

thanks again.

[MsPurple]

Hi Hylo.

I know the struggle and frustration. My depression and anxiety didn't fully improve when I was on my meds. I had been put on them when I was 12, off again then on again at 15 then off at 19 then on again at 23. When I went back on them at 23 they weren't really working for me. They had to fiddle with my meds again. It does suck having to change meds or being worried they are not working as they should.

I would talk to your dr again about it. They may need to take another approach. It is ok to talk to your dr about your concerns. They more you discuss and the more open you are the more they can help you.

I know my advise is general and it can be frustrating to here but its the best I can give. When is your next appointment? Maybe see if you can get an earlier appointment

[geoff]

hello Hylo, our intrusive thoughts are always terrible, either using medication or not taking anything, but I've been on SSRI for longer than I can remember and had OCD for 56 years, and yes my intrusive thoughts are in my dreams, but as awful as they are, none of them have ever come to fruition.
Can I tell you years ago I always wanted to hurt my dear Mum, but I loved her so much, so it was very distressing but nobody else ever knew about, but it kept on happening for several years, until the day she was put into a nursing home and then they suddenly stopped, I suppose because then she was in helpless position.
I used to talk to myself why on earth would I ever want to hurt my dear Mum, I love her, but day after day it tormented me to the point of exhaustion, but since that day when she was put into the nursing home, I know that none of them no matter how ghastly they are, they would never come true.
I would love to see what I look like when I'm asleep and have them, but as soon as I wake up I dismiss them all.
I know how terrible they are for you, but please trust me none of them you would ever follow through with, but this won't stop this debilitating anxiety unless you learn to know they won't happen. Geoff.

[Hylo46]

Hi Geoff,

Thanks for sharing!

I feel like sharing a little more too after you opening up 🙂 My intrusive thoughts once upon a time, say 8-10 years ago were only about me, getting cancer, catching aids, it seemed easier to deal with... until I met the love of my life and it all did a 180 about 2.5 years ago, I started having intrusive thoughts that i would cheat on her, or that she would out something from my past and she would leave me. i agreed to go on meds, but then my intrusive thoughts went to another level, i read the side effects of SSRI and couldn't get out of my head that I might do something every bad, hurt my niece and nephew, poison a family member or someone close to me, it became so much more full on and criminal in a blink of an eye... a far cry from me just thinking I would get sick etc. The guilt that comes along with this is the hardest bit. I try to tell myself that I would never do these things but the images are so powerful and thoughts are so distressing. I lost my partner anyway because i couldn't handle my thoughts. What I would give to just rewind and have the intrusive thoughts of sickness, I could deal with those much easier!

Thanks for listening or should I say reading. oh and the dreams bit you mentioned - they freak me out too, they feel so real and are hard to wipe, they can be just as powerful!

Hylo.

[geoff]

hi Hylo, thanks for getting back to me, and I couldn't agree anymore than what you are saying, so it's a battle between what the thoughts are telling you to do and then your thoughts that there is no way on earth you could possibly do any of this, and yes this will go on until you can realise that it would ever happen, now that's easier said than done when you are struggling with these awful thoughts.
You know that people who don't have OCD may never understand why we have these thoughts or why we have to check the locks 3 or 4 times, because they ask themselves 'why', why does a sensible person have to do this, they must be crazy, hell no, believe me we aren't crazy, we have an illness that is so difficult to understand, so partners or spouses decide to leave because they think it's ridiculous that a normal person has to do any of this, if only they would understand that a chap aged 62 (that's me)has to touch objects 4 times, however I always hide it when doing it, so no one can see me.
You have to remember how you coped with having these thoughts about your sickness, how and why did they disappear or why were they overtaken by these other thoughts, it's an anxiety that is causing this, and sometimes we have them is because we feel insecure in ourselves, so we have these awful thoughts to then feel as though we are taking back control of our mind in a situation where you may not feel comfortable.
Have a battle in your mind between the thoughts of sickness and hurting someone, let them battle their way out of it, yes I know it will cause some problems but it maybe a way to help you accept that none of these are ever going to happen.
Write these two down on a piece of paper and keep looking at them, this will show you what you are struggling with.
If you don't understand what I'm trying to say then please get back to me and let me know it goes. Geoff.

[CheeseSlices]

My intrusive thoughts are also worst on SSRI and "low dose sleeping medication" aka antipsychotics

I am appalled at the responses on this site - OCD is a side effect of SSRI medication. It is awful people are telling you to put up with WORSENING of your symptoms to wait it out for a drug that might actually be making it worse. There are thousands of accounts online of OCD impulses being completed whilst on medication. It can be hard to find because they do not want it being mass knowledge - but the data is there back to the early 90's.

You do not have to put up with worsening symptoms. Medication can take affect mere hours after ingestion for some people, even SSRIs.

My ocd was easing as I dropped the dosage. But I cant drop the dosage further unless I want to live in the toilet the rest of my days with the damage long term medication use did to my stomach. I cant get off the drugs that are causing my symptoms. Its worse than what you describe now and imo not worth the risk.

Observation is an interesting way to look at intrusive thoughts - but I found this near on impossible while clouded by overmedication.

[Verita]

Hi, Its worth going straight to the doctor and airing your concerns about the medication if the side effects are a real concern to you. Fear is so crippling and finding an experienced psychotherapist to help talk you through dealing with your fear. and the right medication if necessary is important. Have Faith, if you want to see a doctor straight away then dont hesitate thats what they are there for, you want to get best possible advice for you and your situation. and they can refer you to a suitable therapist for your situation. Are you able to talk to your family about your concerns?