Never-ending cycle

[WritersBlock]

I have started a new job. My anxiety has skyrocketed. Not least because I have been here before. The last 3 years have been hell for me and my family. Started a number of jobs and for whatever reason I have given the job up. External factors have played a part, bullying for example. Anxiety has always lingered. I am now on medication. I am seeing a psychologist. This cycle seems to never end. It's draining my wife who is supportive. I am trying my best but feels the waves are pushing me deeper and deeper

[Avo]

Hi there,

how is the new job going?

i understand how u feel and it is awful and exhausting and yes can feel like a never ending cycle. Is the psychologist helpful? I saw a few different psychs til I clicked with one.

Do you have much time out? For me when anxiety hits, I am physically and mentally exhausted. I need to take a step back from life and start to take care of myself. Meditation is a big factor for me. What things do you like doing for you that bring you enjoyment?

Things will get better and you are making a start at that by being on this forum, seeing a psych, medication etc. Progress takes time. I find I have to do a lot of ‘fake it til I make it’ and that can be exhausting but at the same time it keeps you going. Sink or swim as they say.

how long have u been on meds and seeing the psych for?

hang in there 😀

[WritersBlock]

Hi Avo.

Thanks for the reply.

The job is going ok. It is a high paced stressful job regardless of anxiety. For me it's a mid life thing where I have been pigeon holed in a certain industry. For financial and social pressure I push on. The meds are new, I have been on them before. Matter of time of how I go.

[Here_I_am]

Hi Writer's Block,

I can appreciate the feeling of being locked into an industry and having few options than to go for high stress roles. My biggest concern is that if I am not working and earning good money, what will happen to my family and their quality of life? How can we continue on with mortgage, car repayments, loans/credit card repayments, etc.?

My wife works, but I don't see how anyone survives on one income these days - plus I don't want to be on the fringes of employment. I am skilled at what I do and want to do it.

I was recently made redundant from a role I enjoyed, and have been offered another role quite quickly. Yet here I sit a week after the offer was made waiting for them to get back to me on a crim-check outcome (which should only take a couple of days in my experience!) and a contract. My anxiety is saying 'they've changed their mind and they're waiting for you to tell them you've found something else', but of course the reality is that once you have an offer, you kind of stop looking/interviewing.

I hope you find your rhythm in your new role, and that you're spared the ongoing chaos of 'what will I do now?' experiences that come from the mess of being in between jobs. 🙂

[Marie_W]

Hi Writer’s Block (and Avo and Here I am),

Thank you for sharing with us what is going on for you at the moment. I’m really hearing that it has been a difficult few years for you and your family. You said that your anxiety has skyrocketed since getting the new job and that you have felt this way before in workplace settings. Is it okay to ask whether you have always felt anxious at your jobs or if this is something that has started in the past 3 years?

I also just wanted to mention that despite how overwhelming things must feel for you at the moment, it sounds like you have taken some really proactive steps to manage your anxiety (by going to a psychologist and also commencing medication). You said that you will have to wait and see how the medication goes, but are you finding the sessions with a psychologist helpful at all?

It’s also great to hear that you have a wife who is supportive of you. Is it okay to ask what she does that makes you feel so supported?

Looking forward to hearing from you if you would like to reply.

- Marie (: