Moving house anxiety

[Tash]

Hi all, I've been in my rental for 8 yrs by myself & last week was told I need to vacate. This has triggered a lot of panic & fee in me as it was unexpected & I have a dog so the rental market is challenging. I've been unable to do simple things like concentrate at work & basically not cry several times per day. I yesterday found somewhere to live, with my partner but I still have anxiety about leaving my home & also living with someone which I haven't done in 10 yrs. Every time my landlord contacts me I get triggered & my friends haven't been supportive at all, just placating me while they live in huge houses & don't offer any way of helping. My partner is great but  I of course think of every way this all might go wrong despite having a great relationship for 4 yrs. I'm so down, lonely in my thoughts & just feel hopeless & lost.

[Croix]

Dear Tash~

Welcome here to the Support Forum. It certainly most upsetting and overwhelming to have to move after so long. There are lots of thngs to arrange and move and that is a worry, as it all the day to day shops and travel that are gong to be different.

The prospect of livng with your partner of 4 years is also unknown territory and after 10 years on your own will no doubt mean adjustments by both of you.

Even so it may not be anything like as problem-filled as you are imagining. You may find living together is fun and brings you closer together. Your travel and nearby facilities might be easier to get to, and your new residence may have better conveniences such as heating and laundry.

I guess the idea is to recognize there will be changes, and to start with they will take  practice, however it is not necessarily bad. It is after all a two person job, and I'd hope your partner will make it as easy for you as possible, just as you will.

As this is obviously getting to you and reaching the stage where you are worrying excessively perhaps it might be a good time ot see your GP in an extended consultation and say how this has been affecting you -then see what happens.

You may be surprised at how smoothly things work out

Croix

[Tash]

Thank you so much for your kind words. I've been worried about whether I'm making the right decision when I guess I won't know until I go for it. I've been having some counselling and he said my partner seems to be a good person who's leaning in right now so it looks very positive. I keep looking at properties for myself & then wondering why I would do that, its fear I think. Just the unknown. 

[Croix]

Dear Tash~

Of course the unknown is unsettleing, even scary, however giving it a  try sounds sensible, particularly if your partner is good and impressed your counselor.

Looking at places just for yourself (and dog) can always be done if things do not work out, however I suspect it may simply be nerves giving you reservations and that everything will end up fine.

Can you take your partner into your confidence about being worried? You may find you have an ally to lean on

if you wanted you could let us know how you get one, we'd be most interested

Croix

[Guest_40112537]

It is stressful moving house.And moving in with a partner is a big move.We are all standing with you.

[Guest_9989]

I’m sorry you’re going through this. It’s understandable to feel panicked and anxious with such a big change. Moving is stressful, especially with a pet, and adjusting to living with someone again after 10 years can be daunting.

It's great that you have found a place and have a supportive partner. Try to focus on the positives and take it one step at a time. It’s okay to feel scared, but remind yourself that you’re not alone in this. Maybe talk to your partner about your fears—sharing them might help ease your anxiety.

Hang in there. You’re stronger than you think.

Take care,