Left my job due to anxiety

[BlackCat90]

Hi guys,

This is my first post. I've been battling anxiety for about 9 years now. I'd thought that I really turned a corner when I finally got through my teaching degree and landed a job at the school of my dreams last year. I had a great time there last year but this year it just never felt right. There was a change to the leadership which brought a lot of changes to the school and our workload. I initially thought 'I love the kids, I'm happy to have a job and I can make this work'. I ended up being miserable though. I suffered insomnia, felt sick driving to work and always felt edgy/anxious while I was there. I got to breaking point and decided to take some time off to get better with the hope to go back. Today I made the decision to resign as I don't want to risk further damage to my mental health. I swing from feeling enormously relieved about this decision to feeling terrified and just wanting to hide under the doona. My family have been supportive but none of them have been through this. I guess I'm feeling a bit alone at the moment and was wondering if anyone else has had this kind of experience? I'm finding it hard to see how things are going to work out. I'm hoping it will be for the best because I'm putting my self and my health first but I'm just having a tough time coming to terms with my decision.

Thanks!

[BlackCat90]

Hi Homemaker Rae,

thanks for your post, it's good to know I'm not alone in this experience. I hope you're doing ok

[Homemaker_Rae]

Hi Extripated, I read your post last night and have been thinking about it since. I am so scared too. I am supposed to go back to work tomorrow, but am dreading it and feel trapped.

BlackCat90 - I am sorry to hear about what you are going through, but I am thankful you posted this thread. I don't feel so alone.

All the best for your day.

[BballJ]

Hi BlackCat90,

Firstly, I really like you profile picture about going to therapy. Very nice.

I know you can feel alone outside the forums, it is tough to talk about, do you have any kind of support network, friends or family anyone you can confide it and let them know what is happening?

My best,

Jay

[Grace888]

Hello BlackCat90

I do like your name by the way. My cat is sitting beside me as I write to you and I feel certain he approves too.

I resigned from my job today due to the increasing impact it was having on my health. I feel a little scared too and also a little relieved. And a bit guilty.

Mine is a similar situation to yours - overworked, many organisational changes and little support. Also elements of overt and passive bullying.

This resulted in insomnia over several months, panic attacks and a complete loss of confidence in my ability to do my work to my usual high standards. And terrible nausea!

I don't mean to hijack your post by mentioning my own situation. I thought it would help you to know that you are not alone in this.

I hope you are sleeping and feeling better this week, and enjoying a little more peace of mind.

All the best.

G

[White_Rose]

Hello Black Cat

You are right in saying part of your distress is grief. Often we ignore or forget that losing someone or something you love means we go through a grieving process. Anxiety and grieving do go together. I hope your psych will help you to talk about this.

You said you had a supportive family which is great. Are you able to talk them about your loss? It can help to talk to someone who does not try to 'fix' you. Someone who will simply listen to you. The others who have posted here are also a good support as they have been in your situation or similar. It does help to know you are not the only one with this experience.

Take one day at a time and try to only look at tomorrow, at least for a while. Looking too far ahead can make you anxious and does nothing useful for you. I understand you want to be looking for the step and that's great. For the moment live day by day and you will find your anxiety easier to cope with.

Mary

[BlackCat90]

Hi Jay,

my family has been really supportive and good to talk to. I hate worrying them though - it sometimes feels like all I talk about is how I'm feeling

[BlackCat90]

Hi G,

Thanks for your post, it really helps to know that I'm not alone in this experience. I'm starting to sleep a little better and though I still think about it a lot, it doesn't feel like it's dominating my thoughts as much as it was. I just want to move forward from this. I wish it was easier!

[BlackCat90]

Thanks Mary,

I've been really open with my family about this experience and it's helped. Ive been gradually feeling a little better this week. I'm sleeping better and not as much panic during the day. Thanks for your advice about taking it one day at a time - sometimes I forget to do this and get too caught up in worrying about the future. A few of my friends from work have been calling to see how I'm going and it keeps bringing the situation back to the front of my mind. I guess once things die down a bit and this is old news I'll be able to think about it less

[Grace888]

Hi BlackCat90

It is good that you are sleeping a little better - it makes such a difference, doesn't it?

I hope you are feeling a little lighter in spirits having made your decision. I am sure you will gradually come to focus more on the positive future opportunities ahead of you than on the painful past.

Give yourself some time to adjust and rest, and rediscover some neglected hobbies or interests. You deserve this time.

Look after you

G

[White_Rose]

Hello Black Cat

It is hard at times when events or people remind you of your loss. May I suggest that you concentrate on seeing the care and concern of your friends at work rather than your loss. Again not the easiest of things to do but one which will be a great help. Knowing you have people who care is a real bonus. Rejoice in being loved and think about how much that reflects your personality. You are brave and caring and your friends think of you that way. They can see your distress and want to help. It's a good feeling.

Mary