I never thought anxiety would affect me

[Diamondback]

So to be honest I had always thought anxiety was a bunch of hoo ha and something people had made up.... Have a spoonful of concrete and harden up I had always thought I was a strong person and had the philosophy of shit happens move on.... I had my first anxiety attack around 4 years ago there was no real reason for it a little stress at work and that was where it had happened I literally left work thinking I needed to go to the hospital because I was having a heart attack me being who I am thought I was being stupid went home slept it off and had no other issues for approximately 2 years my next episode was driving on a road which I thought was unsafe not just a small amount a large amount. 2 hours. I ended up in tears with my husband and son I was convinced we were going to die in a car accident. We got to our destination I slept next day I was fine. The real start of my constant anxiety was approximately 6 months ago I was at work a bit stressed but nothing out of the ordinary and it started again I literally thought I was having a heart attack and going to die luckily enough I was able to go have a sleep come back thinking it would all be ok like it normally does but this time it did not go away.... The hardest thing I find is people asking what triggers your anxiety and to be honest there is nothing big mostly my anxiety is triggered by my fear of having anxiety....there has never been a point in my life before where I have been so scared and irrational the realisation at the time that it was real and I could not control it made it even worse. So over the last couple of months seeing a councillor it has finally started to help. I realised in fearing my anxiety it only made it worse.... Accepting my...hang on no! 'the' anxiety it separates it from who I am I wrote a letter to 'the' anxiety and I know it sounds weird but after that and accepting it rather than fearing it every day seems to get easier. Don't get me wrong I still have days where I don't want to get out of bed and do what I need to do but those days seem to be getting rarer and rarer and I feel myself getting a little more certain everyday about who I am and what I feel not trying to push everything aside which is probably how i ended up here in the first place. I am thankful for my friends and family that have supported me through this, talking to me everyday and I know now it's not an easy fix but eventually my life will feel some what normal again 😊

[blondguy]

Hi Diamondback

Welcome to you and what an inspirational post about what you have been going through and having such a clear understanding of this awful condition...Good on You Diamondback!

I understand what you have been going through and its tough....and scary. I had my first mega anxiety attacks when I was 23 and I had the same crap feelings too

You have just helped many people on the forums by your post Diamondback...You are spot on about the fear of having a panic attack triggering another one...

Diamondback Said "The hardest thing I find is people asking what triggers your anxiety and
to be honest there is nothing big mostly my anxiety is triggered by my fear of having anxiety"

Diamondback also mentioned " I know now it's not an easy fix but eventually my life will feel some what normal again 😊"

You also mentioned about not controlling the anxiety too....spot on again 🙂 Fighting or trying to control anxiety will only exacerbate the symptoms.

I really hope you can stick around the forums (if you wish of course) and share your ability to accept the anxiety thus reducing the severity of the symptoms that we go through

What a great post and thanks again DB

Great Stuff! 🙂

my kind thoughts

Paul

[strothers101]

Great ppst Diamondback,

I have just started my journey to recovery with a 6 year long battle with anxiety. At one point I couldnt even walk into a shopping centre without almost fainting. Ive taken steps to improve myself but am now seeing a professional. Well beyond the worst of it.

I still have days that i fixate on something and allow it to cause me anxiety but i think with treatment the worst is behind me.

Good to hear of your success story.

Keep on trucking.

Strothers.

[BballJ]

Hi Diamondback,

Firstly, welcome to the forums.

Amazing first post, it is a great success story I think. As someone who has suffered from anxiety for around 10 years, I can totally relate to what you were saying, for many years I brushed my anxiety off and never thought I had it, I googled symptoms and it came up as anxiety and sort of ignored it. It kind of builds up however and sort of just hit an impass and I knew something wasn't right. Best thing I ever did was seek help like you did, start seeing a psychologist and working through it.

I do hope you stick around the forums and offer your advice and experience to people who need it. We are all sufferers of a mental health issue just trying to help each other.

My best for you,

Jay

[Diamondback]

I can not even imagine having six years of feeling that way all I wanted every day was for it to be gone and every day I fought it it got worse. I was at the point where I could barely drive to work.... If I could not talk to someone on the phone one the way there I pretty much felt like I couldn't do it so came up with plenty of distractions which got me there but at the end of it I always felt like a mess. I kinda thought my home was a sanctuary And as soon as I got there I would be fine. Until I wasn't. Anxiety is a stalker no matter where you go... The first time it happened at the shops it took all my might not to lose it and the fear of going back scared the absolute crap out of me. At that point I decided I will not let this control my life (thus the support from seeing someone, the doctor, yoga and any other natural therapies crystals or whatever else that may help....and as always easier said then done but as I said before accepting this seemed to have helped....

[strothers101]

Its been an uphill battle in all honesty. Self medicated through my early 20s etc. Now im in my late 20s and need to start pushing forward. Im in the final 6 months of my degree and have some very difficult times ahead. In order to have the strength, conviction and courage to cope with the coming stresses I need to get my mind right.

So, i guess for me its sink or swim. Get treatment, promote a healthy mind and hopefully the rest will get easier.

Driving on highways became a huge issue for me until recently. I was afraid id have a panic attack and lose control of the car, which made me panic more haha.

[blondguy]

Thanks for posting back DB

Yes it is easier said than done. You have been proactive by having a good support mechanism with your doctor and the alternative coping techniques as well.

I neglected to mention that I never took counseling very seriously until my anxiety became worse after 13 years. I then understood that super regular therapy was a huge help to finding the way out of the dark place I was in.

I really admire your understanding of 'acceptance therapy'. This is a also a huge step where recovery is concerned.

My reference was a basic paperback without any jargon called 'Self Help for your Nerves' by Dr Claire Weekes.

Dr Weekes was a leading psychiatrist who also suffered anxiety attacks/GAD. She then wrote about 'acceptance' of the feelings of anxiety thus turning them into a memory.....after a heap of practice of course.

Great thread Diamondback 🙂

Paul

[BballJ]

Hi Diamondback,

I used to be exactly the same, literally couldn't drive in the car if I wasn't speaking to someone on the phone to distract me from my overthinking mind. Crazy how anxiety symptoms just are so similar across people.

Also, strothers101, please keep strong, I know it is an uphill battle but you can and will get through it.

My best,

Jay

[blondguy]

Sorry for highjacking your post Diamondback...just a comment for Strothers..

Strothers101.....I had the driving issues for years starting in my 20's..that can be a very scary place to be. I have a couple of things that work well if you want to ask me on any of my threads no no worries at all...My Best. Paul

Thanks Diamondback 🙂