I have an irrational and crippling fear of... checking my mail

[CourtneyJ]

No this not the start of a joke. I am a GAD sufferer who is absolutely terrified of checking my mail.

The last time I checked my mail (late September) I had a GIANT fine waiting for me. Now I'm too scared to check it again. This isn't the first time I've had this reaction. A few years ago I got notice saying there was a letter/package waiting for me at the post office. I FREAKED out and assumed the worst. My top choices were fine from the tax department, fine from speeding or running a red light or someone serving me legal papers because they're suing me.

Now all my bills are delivered my email (I think) and I have no reason to believe there's another fine or "bad news" waiting for me. The really horribly thing is that if there is a fine/bill in the mail the longer it goes without being paid the more expensive it'll probably get.

I know I have to get past the fear and just do it. But even the thought of approaching my mail box makes me feel violently ill.

[Matchy69]

Hi CourtneyJ i have had that fear of checking my mail.The first time was when i got a sumons to do Jury duty which i was petrified to do and after that i was scared to check my mail for ages after thinking it will be something bad but adventually got use to chrcking again but allways a bit weary checking it.I to have all my bills come by email and the only mail i really get is from the hospital for appointments.

I hope this improves for you.

Take care,

Mark.

[quirkywords]

Courtney,

I have a fear of phone calls either answering or making them so I can understand yours.

So email does not scare you?

[CourtneyJ]

Thank you Mark. It's nice to know I'm not alone.

I've decided to take baby steps. Tomorrow morning I'm going to retrieve my mail, throw away the junk but not read the rest. Just put it in my handbag.

And that's as far as my plan goes. Just one small step forward.

[CourtneyJ]

Oh I hate phone calls too. I don't answer or return calls from unknown numbers if they don't leave a voicemail with a damn good reason why I should. Unknown numbers freak me the hell out!!!

I hadn't really thought about it, but no email doesn't freak me out.

I feel like letters are more official and more likely to be horrible news.

[blondguy]

Hi CourtneyJ

Emails can be a pain especially when we are anticipating one we dont want to read...At least in our street letterbox we have the choice of whether or not to open a letter! After spending time in the family court I used to dread checking my email too...yet not anymore

Just a note on incoming calls.....If anyone calls you using a private or withheld number it cant be that important not to mention if they dont leave a message. I dont answer any incoming calls from people or organisations that dont have the courtesy to show their number

great profile pic by the way 🙂

Paul

[CMF]

Hi CourtneyJ and welcome,

I too get anxiety about mail. I feel anxious if i hear the mailman's bike and on my way home from work. Calls from numbers i don't know make me anxious and i too do not bother with calls that do bot leave a message. Sometimes i call the number back to see who it is, often telemarketers, i then block them.

Take care

cmf x

[Croix]

Dear CourtneyJ~

I have had the same fear of my mailbox, it started before I was invalided out of my occupation with anxiety and some other conditions. For a long time I would simply not go near the thing, and left it up to my partner to field the contents.

Like you notifications from the post office there was something to be picked up left me in great fear of what might be the . The part I used to hate worst was receiving such a message late Friday and having to wait until Monday to find out what it was.

Although I now do empty the mailbox myself I'm still a bit nervous of it, but nothing like before. I manage.

I guess the improvement has come from two areas. firstly my general anxiety and other conditions have greatly improved, to the extent that nowadays I lead a productive life with love and achievement, and support my family as well as being supported.

The other thing was my hobbies reading and movies. I found a site on the web that sells ex-library books very cheap, plus I look for used ex-rental DVDs on eBay or similar sites.

By making small purchases spaced out so they arrived singly I eventually found I'd approach the box actually hoping something pleasant like a book or DVD was there. A pretty drastic change in thinking. Sometimes apprehension still, but nothing like it was.

So I guess I've treated myself like Pavlov's dog, using reward. Is it possible you might try something similar? It does not have to be purchases which do add up, it could be a pen pal or something else.

Croix

[CourtneyJ]

Thanks to everyone who has replied. It's interesting that this doesn't seem to be a really rare point of anxiety!

So this morning I bit the bullet and checked my mail.

There's only a few actual letters and 2 with government markings (but I'm pretty sure I know what they are).

Nevertheless I'm too scared to open them just in case it's not what I think it is. I'm actually planning on opening them in my next therapy session (which is in a few days).

[Matchy69]

Thats good you checked the mail that is a great first step.

Yes these types of anxiety are more prevelant then you think.I also hate answering the phone or checking text msgs.I have a panic attack if their is a knock at the door.

Take care,

Mark.