High pressure job and an overflowing feeling of Anxiety

[Powerful_mind]

Hi there, this is my first post so bare with me. Bit of background... I’m a social worker and in a very high pressured job. Most people quit in the first 3 months... I’m coming up to that 3 months and one day after the Easter long weekend I started to get IMMENSE feelings of anxiety about going to work. I wake up a few times during the night over thinking about something I have to do or about a meeting coming up that could be confronting or if I do something wrong what will happen to me? I think what this all boils down too however, is that my previous job started to make me feel this way in the end and it was at no fault of my own. The supervisor was OCD perfectionist about work and would niggle at every single thing I’d do, pull me in for a review meeting, tell me all the things I’m doing wrong (even when I’m doing exactly what I’m told) and then send me off my way with no support at all.... 8 people quit the same month I did so that gives you a bit of an idea...

My current job is very supportive... I get complimented on my work often and reassured that what I’m doing is the right thing, I just get super stressed that I’ll slip up and then it will all go down hill from There. Yesterday at a training I met another person in my same role who lived in a different city. She could relate with me and it made me feel so much better to talk to someone other then in my office. I can’t do that every time I get anxious though and I don’t know how much longer I can go feeling this way... waking up with a knot in my stomach and tight chest, going to sleep the same way. Over and over again. I also think because I am a social worker I should be able to deal with this. But nothing prepares you for shitty bosses that basically traumatise you into thinking your always going to be doing something wrong!!

i try and move past it by doing word finds... remembering that my supervisor wouldn’t be sitting in her lounge at 2am thinking about me and all the things I have to do and that probability of me being fired on the spot for ‘making a mistake’ is really really low and I’ll probably just get told how to do it right the next time. I’m so challenged and I’d love to meet some people that can relate to me!

Thanks!

[smallwolf]

Hi Powerful_mind,

not sure exactly where to start. But I think that doing word find games is a good start. Not sure what app you use, but I use the one that comes with virtual hope box. It was recommended to me by my psychologist.With that said, it sounds like you are trying to do the right things with the word find and challenging your thinking. But probably what happened at your last job is fresh in your mind and so your worry is natural.

I would not go to sleep in the same manner as you, but I would go to sleep with work stuff on my mind. Then I would wake at 2am with similar thoughts, stay awake for a bit before going back to sleep before the cat would wake me. In short broken sleep. And then when I started work I would get extremely anxious when opening email client thinking about the abuse I might receive. Putting aside the work changes with the help of my support I would use the tools in the virtual hope box to clear my mind of negative thoughts.

also having someone you can talk about your daily stresses can be helpful. And perhaps this space might be helpful fro you as well. When you said that you should be able to deal with this... are you referring to your former boss or something else? Remember that you are only human. I read and heard somewhere that therapists also see therapists. The work you would do is important so being able to talk to someone about those issues....?

I am listening to you,

Tim

[LizzieBaby]

Hi Powerful_Mind,

I'm in the same boat as you, I've just joined the forum for help 🙂 Work causes me a lot of anxiety too, and just like you I wake up with absolute dread about things that probably won't happen. I'm trying a bit of self talk (I'm awesome, people love me, if I do something wrong and they get mad and sack me then THEY are the idiots!) Just little things like that to try and boost my confidence. It's so hard when you look around and think, people are nice to me, it's not too bad in general, so why do I do his to myself? And then I remember it's not rational, I need to relax. I feel for you and I hope my rambling has helped you in some way. 🙂