Freaking out about graduating

[Missberri]

Hi everyone,

I'm just freaking out a bit lately and would love to hear some support and advice if anyone has any! I'm about to finish my university degree and it has been a long time coming. I've always struggled with anxiety and depression and other problems throughout my degree and it's made getting through it extremely difficult! This past year though I've really worked hard and done the best I could and I'm happy it's finally nearly over. I'm freaking out though because I'm really worried about what it's going to be like in a proper work place and if I'll even get a job or if I'll even do well. Sometimes when I talk to other students at uni they've already got so much experience and are doing all these side projects and extra curricular activities and I feel like I'm just not good enough or maybe I won't do well. I don't even know if I really enjoy what I'm studying but it's a bit too late to change it now..

I'm not sure if anyone else experiences this but it's really starting to get to me. I'm supposed to be doing an internship soon for one of my last subjects but even that is freaking me out.. I just don't feel like I'm up to the standard that people want in the workplace and I don't know how to feel more confident. It's making me feel extremely unmotivated and depressed with these last few subjects I'm doing and that's really not how I wanted to feel! I would really appreciate any advice though or experiences anyone else has with this because I am just feeling so lost right now 😕

[MsPurple]

HI Missberri. I graduated late 2015 and had my ceremony mid 2016. I had the exact same fears and concerns as you. I was worried about getting a job and whether I would be able to cope with my anxiety. I made sure I looked after myself after graduation. I continued therapy and getting support from my team. I was also told to take in one step at a time. Finish uni and go to graduation. Look for work post uni (work casually where I had worked while doing my degree till I got a job). I eventually got a job and was a bit anxious but made sure I kept up with self care. If I was anxious I would go to the bathroom and do deep breathing.

The moral of the story is to try and take it one step at a time and to try not stress until you reach that road. Worrying made it worse for me. I also trusted my counsellor and followed what they said.

I know it is a bit nerve racking entering the unknown but trust me you will be able to do it. You have studied and worked hard to complete your degree. Be happy and proud of yourself for achieving this.

[bipolarbeauty]

Hello Missberri,

You are not alone. I have been through University - it can be a rollercoaster of a ride, but after I was academically excluded from my nursing degree in third year, I still kept on fighting for my education, but my symptoms always got in the way. I'm taking a break from studies now though. I found the academic/career counsellor helped with me with some things at the time on where I wanted to go with my career i.e. problems with keeping motivated, feeling anxious. In terms on counselling with very specific personal problems, I didn't find that particular counselling was very helpful at my then University, maybe for the fact it was the biggest University in my state population wise, and they wanted to push as many appointments as possible I felt.

Have you tried seeing a counsellor with feeling unmotivated/depressed?

Also for your information, there's the beyond blue 24/7 line 1300 22 4636 should you need extra support.

Keep us in the loop, Missberri.

Suzi

[Sophie_M]

Hi Missberri, thanks for posting again and great to see you've already received some replies from the community.

When you're next online, it would be good if you could pop back into your earlier threads and acknowledge the members there who have provided you support here on the forums previously.  It can be quite disappointing for members when they reach out to reply to someone needing support and don't hear back, and it makes it less likely you'll receive support in the future, so we hope you can post back in these threads even if it's just a few words of thanks:

Losing relationships

Feeling burnt out

[Missberri]

Hi so sorry about that guys I really do appreciate all the advice and I think you're both right that it would be good to go back to counselling to talk about these things as I haven't seen anyone for a while, and sorry for not responding earlier I definitely will in the future and thank you guys for taking the time to reach out 🙂 I am still feeling a bit lost about it all but I'm just trying to push through it and hope that everything works out okay. Thanks again for the advice!

[HamSolo01]

hey there missberri

i hope you are managing well so far so good.

Your situation is parallel to mine. I too feel that ive not got enough experience under my belt in life just generally let alone work experience. I was set to graduate in the middle of this year (and even that was an extension on my original graduation date by a year). I had to drop to part time because of my mental health. I was extremely hard on myself expecting so much from myself and constantly setting myself to an impossible standard. Why this is I'm still working on with my psych, who i have actually changed from very very recently despite only having seen her 4 times. Thats mental health i guess. I study arts, majoring in a bunch of things lol. But here's the thing.. everyone has a different path and it is unwise to expect everyone let alone yourself to be able to follow the same one.

I remember flicking through LinkedIn recently seeing all the people who were far more experienced than i and thinking it was all a waste. But then i remember the truth... no two people are the same. I think it was the philosopher David Hume who once said that we seldom compare ourselves to people who we know are doing worse.. but only to those whom we know are doing better. Its a strange thing we do as humans really.

My point is that we are limited by circumstances and we can only do so much. Comparisons to others are a guarenteer of misery and unhappiness and it holds you back.

I question my choice of course everyday haha. But i ask myself if i regret choosing it. No i dont. I think if you are this far into your course then you must be happy with it. Thats all that matters. Yes money is a worry but life is more than money. Happiness isnt condusive to money despite what people say.. they are normally deluded.

Anyway thats a long response haha.

My point is that its normal to feel this way. So long as you make some good decisions now then you will be sweet and set. If you have to decline some things due to your health then that's okay too. I had to knock back an internship in the premiere of nsw office.. was upset but it was necessary. Thats how it is. Glad i did in the end as i ended up at hospital.. again.

No opportunity is worth taking if it costs you your health.

Stick with it and ensure you are getting the help you need. Also check out the under 25s thread on the young people's forum. There are some people our age there who have great advice.

All the best 🙂

[Missberri]

Hi HamSolo01 thanks so much for your very insightful response ! 🙂 I know I definitely do compare myself to people who may have some things better than me a lot and I guess it is pretty silly and not helpful at all.. I've actually just graduated not too long ago and am starting a full time job really soon so I'm doing a lot better than I thought i would. It's crazy how much you can get in your head about things sometimes and then have things turn out not nearly as bad as you thought they would.

I still am unfortunately having some struggles with depression, I'm in a new place and feeling really unsettled, but i think it's just important to keep going and let my emotions come and go because there are going to be some bad days and a lot of good days too.

But yeah thanks a lot for your post it makes a lot of sense and I really need to start looking at where I am more than where I feel like I should be based on what others are doing. I hope things are looking up for you too though it's great that you're close to finishing your degree even if it's still gonna be a while it takes a lot of dedication especially with mental health problems so well done!!