EMOTIONAL DISTRESS ABOUT MY MENTAL HEALTH

[Shivers88]

Hi there,,

im very distressed and anxious about my health 😞 basically having intrusive thoughts and ending in full blown panic attacks! Which ended me up in bed for weeks and crying like no tomorrow.. This is hard Journey for me, as the thoughts I've never really experienced like this, harming my children or thinking I'm a pedophile or something stupid like that, it freaked me out. So I started to fight these thoughts out of my head which didn't work, and it snow balled. I felt like I was going crazy!!

Anyway, since then I've been feeling guilty about these thoughts and can't quite shake it off, I'm seeing someone and it's helping but today in particular in finding myself like every other day googling my symptoms, to the point where I'm so anxious I'll keep going until I'm satisfied 😞 I hate it it sucks!! It's like an addiction constantly googling shit to "find" or "self diagnose" I've also been suffering some sadness, but j avoid those feelings and just "keep going" with life you know? I've adjusted to my partner doing FIFO 2/1 and it pretty much happened a week after that, which didn't help at all really... It triggered me off. Do I take meds if I'm feeling really miserable,? I have constant brain fog as If a black cloud is in my head, no clarity or anything 😞 it's debilitating 😞

[blondguy]

Hi Shivers88

Welcome to the Beyond Blue community

I have had severe anxiety and then depression for many years shivers. I do understand where you are coming from.It can be a mongrel of a place to be in. Google is a gold mine of information but with anxiety/depression I would'nt go near it as it can make your symptoms worse as the information is so very conflicting. Even with regular visits to a doc/therapist I wont go near it.

If you scroll to the bottom of this page you will find different topics that can be a huge help. Have a look under 'The Facts' and have a look at the Anxiety & Depression Checklist This checklist will save you much pain and provide you with a better understanding of your symptoms.

Meds can and do help if your doc suggests you go on them. They are not a 'total fix' .....They provide us with a platform on which we can heal and use the therapy/coping mechanisms to do so. They do take away the severe lows though. I have been on AD's since 1997 for my depression and have never looked back.

It is debilitating Shiver..I would get back to even your GP today and like you have done on the forums 'reach out' and say that you are stuck. You mentioned that you are seeing someone which is so great. Beyond Blue also have qualified counselors 24/7 on 1300 22 4636 if you need them .

The brain fog with dissipate..and your clarity will come back. Please stay away from the Google machine at the moment..Way too much conflicting info that may not even apply to you Shiver

You have great strength to post. You are more than welcome to write back as many times as you wish too!

There are many wonderful people on the forums that are sufferers just yourself..I hope you can let us know how you go

Kind Thoughts

Paul

[Fox_tail]

Hey Shivers88

I am pretty much like you, I believe many of the anxiety sufferers are like that too - we self diagnose to the point we think we are a doctor, walking in and out of the chemist where it becomes part of our groceries

I have been to many GPs to check my "illness" not believing many doctors until I found my psychologist.

My psychologist said it's the worse thing to do on googling illnesses and especially when you look at medication side effects (which is unlikely to happen) could be bad enough to freak yourself out. Find a trusted GP/psychologist and talk to them they will give you solid advise or as Paul said check out the Beyond blue website and ring them for advises.

You are not the only one here 🙂

[Shivers88]

Yeah in googling all sorts of craonits making me go crazy! And become very very distressed!

I think I had a full blown mental break down about 8 weeks ago. And I could feel my body was just running on nervousness/intense stress and anxiety, I knew i wasn't feeling great, to the point where I knew something was gonna happen, but I kept going, I literally pushed myself! And I've never experienced this sort of thing this bad, with the obsessions /intrusive thoughts, which were horrible. And they're now making me feel guilty for even thinking them!

Whats worse is today, I was constantly overwhelmed by how I was feeling I would cry evrery time, now feeling of guilt and blame have kicked in, and I'm being so hard on myself. I'm so exhausted I'm really tired of feeling this way.. 😞 I need clarity I need to be a fit mother my kids need me. I hardly have support only my mum.. Mans even still she nags and triggers me off ALOT! My partner who now works away is hardly here, I feel I'm becoming a broken record always going on and on about it.. But I want to get help and get better in dwelling in the things of the passed and also have chronic/ sever anxiety which is crippling too 😞

today a u I was tempted to take the medication prescribed to me, however haven't done so yet. I'm stuck. I feel as though in going to be addicted to them. So thinking of this makes my anxiety and exhaustion go through the ROOF! Someone please shed some light

[Shivers88]

Thanks dear.

Well. I've been run down for a while and find in probably in a mentor breakdown state. Where now, functioning is impossible I can't work ATM, due to it. So it must be pretty bad.

I have good day, I have not so good day, so it comes in waves, is this normal??

Can an youbtell me your experience on medication?? And what your worse was and your best was whilst starting out on them? I was prescribed a SSRI are these good for depression and anxiety...?

As said, from the start, obsessive thought were entering in my head when I broke down and had a massive panic attack, thinking I was going crazy and beginning to think I was a psychopath.. And for a week after felt so irritable as if I was going to act on these thoughts, it truly scared the hell out of me, uncontrollable crying and just anxiety all over I was a mess! Then I started seeing a psychologist and gave me tips which have been helpful... However it comes and goes, if it's not the thoughts, it's the past, it's feelings of guilt and blame, and constant anxiety over loosing my mind or being Bi Polar or Schitz - and for this hoodie doesn't help. Mum exhausted. I really am. I want to laugh again. I don't want these thought I want to function again.

[blondguy]

Hey Shiver

Anxiety/depression is a serious illness just like diabetes or a severe infection....I am not a doctor but have had severe anxiety/depression since 1983 when I was 23.

I am trying to help you Shivers...are the meds AD's or sedatives?

Please do post back...I can only help

Paul

[Shivers88]

No I'm not. They prescribed me a message I haven't got yet.. But it's just I am anxious in taking t as I fear the side effects and addiction.

[Lost_Girl]

Hi Shivers,

I have been on a few different antidepressants (ADs) and off them again easily without becoming addicted. Just make sure that you take them exactly as your GP prescribes and when you are ready to stop work with your GP on how to stop them safely.

Different people react in different ways to medication. If you were to have any side effects you would just chat to your GP and they will work through it with you.

What I can say is that for ADs going on them definitely helps in being able to manage your illness better. As Paul mentioned, it gives you a platform to work from.

I recommend trusting your GP and taking what they have prescribed. I used to consult dr google too but Paul here helped me stop that too. In my experience the meds allowed me to function and there was no problem stopping later on.

Kind thoughts,

Carol

[blondguy]

No worries Shivers....I was just trying to help...I know the anxiety is a mongrel...I used to fear the side effects and addiction too...I hear you...Your health is a gift....The meds arent always addictive....The benefits outweigh the negatives ....sorry...just my opinion....

Thankyou Carol.....xx

Here for you Shivers

Paul

[Shivers88]

Thanks Paul.

i suppose so, I just get things from my mother saying "DONT EVER GO ON MEDICATION" because it spaces you out. So I don't know what on earth to do basically.. Just taking naturapathic anitidepressants and magnesium to calm my panic and mind down. It helped but I stopped for two weeks cause of no funds and then went back on it.. I felt the crash. Can anyone recommend it tell me what their thought were on different medication?